Aardvark
Ever mated with an aardvark? It's a rare opportunity, you know. We're scarce.
Fritz the Cat quotes
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Aardvark
I'm a failure as a pot smoker.
Al (Pig Cop #1)
[in a Synagogue]
You're not supposed to dance, Ralph, 'cause you're not Jewish!
Al (Pig Cop #1)
Now, you have the deeper voice so on three, you yell "Open the **** door". Now, say the word "****" because you got—that makes you sound tough.
Al (Pig Cop #1)
Shh. I think we're here. Do you hear anything, Ralph?
It sounds like a bunch of degenerates in there.
Al (Pig Cop #1)
Alright Shh. now, listen, Ralph, now, listen, you got the deeper voice. you see and I want you to yell, Open the **** door. now say the word **** because that makes you sound tough. When I say three, you yell, Open...
I'm even gonna ad-lib. I'm even gonna ad-lib.
Al (Pig Cop #1)
No ad-libbing, Ralph. No ad-libbing.
Let me call 'em preverts!
Al (Pig Cop #1)
What's a "prevert"?
A prevert is a degenerate! Didn't you know that?
Al (Pig Cop #1)
A prevert's a degenerate?
Didn't you have no bringing up?
Al (Pig Cop #1)
I got bar mitzvahed.
Al (Pig Cop #1)
[Ralph laughs]
You ain't supposed to laugh, Ralph! This is a serious job and we're getting paid for it. Cut the **** shit out. Let's go.
All right. Open up in there! It's the law! Hippie bastards!
Al (Pig Cop #1)
Good, Ralph, do it again.
Open... [Ralph laughs] okay, open up!
Al (Pig Cop #1)
What the ****'s your problem? Cut it out!
I won't laugh! I won't laugh! Open the door, you pre-verts!
Al (Pig Cop #1)
Open up! Law and order's here!
Open up!
Al (Pig Cop #1)
All right in there! All right in there!
Okay, Open up! Here we are!
Crow
[effeminate]
I ain't no jive-ass black ****, honey. Who do you think I am, Geraldine?
You think being a crow is a big mother**** ball? All you cats the same, man! You don't know where it is, and you don't have somebody to tell you where it is. You have to be where it is to find out what's happening!
Revolt! Revolt! Revolt, you thick-skulled idiots! You have carried heavy burdens for the bosses! You have sweat your lives away for the bosses! The bosses! They ride around in limousines!
Crow
Get the **** off my car!
The Bosses! They're eating strawberries and cream!
That's funny! Cats are real boss!
Cool it, officer. He's just blowing hot air. No one's paying no mind.
Come the revolution, there gonna be no more limousines! Come the revolution, there gonna be no more strawberries and cream! See?!
Al (Pig Cop #1)
[laughing]
Hey, Ralph, you know how these dumb kids are. They don't know what they doing.
**** "A" right.
[pointing at the pigs]
There he is! He's the one who keeps the bosses in power! HE'S THE ONE WHO'S HOLDING YOU DOWN!
Al (Pig Cop #1)
Who, me?
You!
Al (Pig Cop #1)
No, no, not me, YOU!
Al (Pig Cop #1)
No You!
You, You, You!
Al (Pig Cop #1)
Me!
Not me, YOU!
Al (Pig Cop #1)
Yeah you!
You!
Al (Pig Cop #1)
**** you!
Ralph (Pig Cop #2): YOU FIRST!
THE SPIKED BUDDHA CAPITALISM! THE IRON THUMB ON THE HEADS OF THE PROLETTERIAT!
Al (Pig Cop #1)
[The crows slowly and angrily surround and close-in on the pigs] [to Ralph; scared]
They're gonna kill us.
[As the crows inch closer, Ralph pulls out a photo of his family] Ralph (Pig Cop #2): [to the crows; smiling nervously] Would you like to see a picture of my kids?
[One of the crows throws a glass bottle at Ralph in his left eye. Ralph starts shooting at the crows, but this only angers them even more. Pig Cop #1 gets on his knees and prays, while Ralph continues shooting frantically before the crows pounce on them and brutally kill them. Horrified, Duke watches the scene turn into chaos before rushing to Fritz.]
Come on, man! You'll get killed up here!
[Duke is suddenly shot and starts bleeding excessively as he slowly dies. His corpse collapses onto the road.]
Son of a bitch.
Winston
You're so clever. so clever. big mechanical genius. here's a bucket, smart guy. good luck.
Hey, this is for shit! you made a big bourgeois deal out of everything. and ruined it completely. I was gonna bug out and be free from all this bullshit and roam around and dig everything and really have a good time.
Winston
Your naivete is astounding. You'd be completely lost without me, Fritz and you know it.
You're a mother**** bitchh!
Winston
I see the hard facts of life! I am realistic, something you're incapable of! You'd be better off with one of those stupid little morons like Charlene who you could just sleep with and throw away when you're done! You can't cope with a mature woman! You haven't the faintest idea how lucky you are that an intelligent woman loves you and wants to give you something of value something that will inflame your creative potential! Now, get going and hurry up!
We'll see who gets lost without whom.
Lizard Leader
I think I'm gonna ride that goddamn whore!
Narrator
Hey, yeah - the 1960s? Happy times, Heavy times.
Newscaster
We interrupt the Israel-Arab war for this special announcement! The President, after conferring with Israel Prime Minister Golda Meir, has agreed to send more arms to Israel - based on the return of New York city and Los Angeles to the United States.
Officer
[last lines]
Eh, poor cat. He was a - he was a kind a tough kid at that, wudden he?
[attempting to keep a group of crows from tearing him and the other pig cop to pieces]
Would you like to see a picture of my kids?
[in a Synagogue; referring to the Rabbis]
They all got long hair. They all got long clothes. Must be a hippie church!