So laying eggs all your life and then getting plucked, stuffed and roasted is good enough for you, is it?
It's a livin'.
Scenes with Bunty
26 scenes Bunty Face it ducks; the chances of us escaping from here are a million to one.
Then there's still a chance.
Mrs. Tweedy
Chickens go in; pies come out.
Mr. Tweedy
What sort of pies?
Mrs. Tweedy
[sarcastic]
Apple.
Mr. Tweedy
My favourite!
Mrs. Tweedy
CHICKEN pies, you great lummox!
Morning, Ginger. Back from holiday?
I wasn't on holiday, Babs. I was in solitary confinement.
Oh, it's nice to get a bit of time to yourself, isn't it?
Listen. We'll either die free chickens or we die trying.
Are those the only choices?
But you're supposed to be up there - you're the pilot.
Don't be ridiculous. I can't fly this contraption.
"Back in your day"? The Royal Air Force?
644 Squadron, Poultry Division - we were the mascots.
You mean you never actually flew the plane?!
Good heavens, no! I'm a chicken! The Royal Air Force doesn't let chickens behind the controls of a complex aircraft!
You see, flying takes three things: Hard work, perseverance and... hard work.
You said "hard work" twice.
That's because it takes twice as much work as perseverance.
First of all, we sneak in all quiet, like...
Yeah, like a-- [pauses] Like a fish? You stupid Norbert.
[aboard the flying machine]
The exits are located here and here. In the quite likely event of a emergency, put your head between your knees--
And kiss your bum goodbye!
Mr. Tweedy
[being attacked by chickens]
Mrs Tweedy! The chickens are revolting!
Mrs. Tweedy
[not paying attention]
Finally, something we agree on.
Eggs from heaven.
No, from her bum.
Increase velocity!
What does that mean?
Bunty It means PEDAL YOUR FLIPPING GIBBLETS OUT!!!
Oh, yes how rude of us it's just that we're very exci- This is a chicken farm.
And we're the chickens.
[Fowler is forced to share his bunk with Rocky]
ABSOLUTELY OUTRAGEOUS! Asking a senior officer to share his quarters?! And with a non-commissioned Yank, no less! Why, back in my day, I'd never...
Hey, you weren't exactly my first choice either. And scoot over, your wing's on my side of the bunk--
"YOUR SIDE OF THE BUNK"?! The WHOLE bunk is MY side of the bunk!
So that's it! You're from the circus.
Shh!
You're on the run, aren't you?
I should turn you in right now!
You wouldn't!... Would you?
Give me one reason why I shouldn't.
Because I'm... cute?
[Ginger squawks loudly] [muffles her]
What are you doing?! Do you know what will happen if that guy finds me?!
It's a cruel world.
I've just decided, I don't like you.
I've just decided, I don't care. Now show us how to fly.
With this wing?!
Teach us then!
No!
[Ginger squawks again] [muffles her again]
Now you listen here, sister. I'm not going back to that life! I'm a lone free ranger! Emphasis on FREE!
And that's what we want! Freedom!
Teach us to fly, and we'll hide you.
And if I don't?!
Time to make good on that deal, doll--
The name, is Ginger.
I thought you were going to teach us how to fly.
That's what I'm doing.
Isn't there usually some flapping involved?
Hey, do I tell you how to lay eggs? Relax, were making progress.
Really? I can't help feeling were going around in circles.
[Ginger points to the chickens, who are indeed, spinning around in circles]
Whoah, woah, cut it out! You're making me dizzy! There, I think they're ready to fly now.
Good, because they certainly can't walk anymore!
You know what your problem is? You're... difficult!
Why, because I'm honest?! I care about what happens to them! Nothing I expect a lone free ranger to know anything about!
Hey, if this is the way you show it, I hope you never care about me!
I can assure you, I never will!
Good!
Fine!
Yo! baby doll!
Rocky!
I'm coming! [He begins slipping on the metal] I'm still coming!
Come on! Stop this thing!
I'm getting there!
ROCKY!
Don't worry! I'll be down there before you can say...
Bunty [Mr. Willard Tweedy walks with the dogs by a flashlight, then shakes a lock, then continues walking with the dogs. A hen named Ginger has just dug a hole with a spoon to get under the fence. She signals Bunty, Babs, and three other chickens to come over to the fence. But they make a loud noise once they come to the fence] [loud whispering]
Shush!
[whimpers]
Bunty [Bunty tries to get under the fence. But she is too big. Willard Tweedy hears this and turns around.]
I'm stuck!
[Ginger rolls her eyes and goes to help Bunty get under the fence. But Edwina, Babs and the other chickens are making too much noise trying to push Bunty under. Once Ginger arrives to the rescue, she puts her wing over Bunty's beak so that Willard Tweedy doesn't hear her. Unfortunately, the noise of Edwina, Babs, and the other chickens trying to push her under the fence attracts the attention of the dogs. Ginger hears the dogs and sees Willard Tweedy trying to hold them back]
Get back!
[They all pull her out of the fence, with Ginger pushing, and then lie down. Ginger runs away from the dog, followed by Mr. Tweedy. The dog continues running at Ginger, then another dog runs at her, chasing her by the door. The dogs walk up the stairs and then touch a gnome. The dogs walk up. Ginger she grabs a garden gnome to fend them off. The dog bites the gnome's head off. Then suddenly the doors open. The dogs cower. Ginger spins around to find Melisha Tweedy, Mr. Tweedy's wife, her face icy and expressionless]
Eh?
What is that chicken doing outside the fence?
Just deal with it. Now!
[Melisha slams the door. She goes back to bed. Willard cowers and carries Ginger to an old coal bin near the side of the barn] [to Ginger]
I'll teach you to make a fool out of me. [He throws Ginger inside, then closes the top and turns to the other chickens] Now let that be a lesson to the lot of you! NO CHICKEN ESCAPES (clenches his right fist) FROM (with point) TWEEDY'S FARM! [He walks away & ready for bed]
[Edwina has been sentenced to the chop after she fails to produce any more.]
Oh no. Edwina. Bunty, why didn't you give her some of yours?
Bunty I would have. She didn't tell me. She didn't tell anyone.
Think everyone, think. What haven't we tried yet?
Uh...
Bunty We haven't tried NOT trying to escape.
What about Edwina? How many more empty nests will it take?
Bunty Well, perhaps it wouldn't be empty if she'd spent more time laying and less time escaping!
So laying eggs all your life and then getting plucked, stuffed and roasted is good enough for you; it is guilty?
It's a living.
Do you know what the problem is? The fences aren't just around the farm; they're up here [Points to head]. There is a better place out there, beyond on the hill, outdoors, trees and grass. You imagine it. Cool grass green.
Chicken
And who feeds us?
We feed ourselves.
Chicken
Where is the farm?
There is no farm.
Then where does the farmer live?
There is no farmer, Babs.
Is he on holiday?
He isn't anywhere! Don't you get it? There's no morning head count, no farmers, no dogs, no coops and locks and keys, and no fences!
Bunty In all my life, I've never heard such a fantastic... LOAD OF TRIPE. [The chickens start murmuring] Let's face the facts, ducks. The chances of US getting out of HERE are 1,000,000 (Million) to 1.
Then there's still a chance.
[The chickens are finding out on a poster that Rocky can't fly.]
Oh, a cannon. Aye, that would give you thrust.
Bunty I knew he was fake all along. In fact, I'm not even certain he was American.
So, what's the next plan, hen?
Perhaps he just went on holiday.
Bunty Perhaps he just wanted to get away from your infernal knitting! [angrily snatches Babs' knitting and stamps it in the mud]
You were always the one that was always hitting him. See how you like it! [pushes Bunty]
Bunty Don't push me, four eyes!
[They start fighting, but Fowler enters.]
Quiet there! Quiet, I say! Dissension in the ranks. Precisely what Jerry would have wanted. The old divide and conquer. A proper squadron works together, like we did in my R.A.F. days. Jocko at the stick, Flappy at the map, and old Whizzbang at the tail-end Charlie. WingCo would give the call, hop in the old crate, chocks away! Wizard show it was. [shows Bunty his air-force medal] That's how you get medals.
Bunty [enraged]
Oh. Will you shut up about your STUPID, BLOOMING MEDALS?!?!
[Bunty furiously slaps the air-force medal out of Fowler's hand and it lands in front of Ginger in the mud, the chickens gasp at it.]
HOW DARE YOU! [angrily hits Bunty with his cane, but then quickly retracts his actions, realising what he's done] Madam, forgive me. A-As an officer, I offer my most-
[Bunty punches Fowler, and all the chickens start fighting in the mud. Ginger sees the Air Force medal and picks it up.]
Fowler. [turns to the chickens fighting in the mud] Everyone! SHUT UP!
[All the chickens stop fighting, with Babs holding on the leg by the mouth, long pause] [clears throat]
Fowler, what exactly is the R.A.F.?
[pulls his face out of the mud]
What do you mean, what is it? [salutes] The Royal Air Force is what! [chuckles]
Then what's the "old crate"?
[Mr. Tweedy, sweating bullets, is once again trying to start the machine.] [under his breath]
C'mon. [groans] Please.
Oh no. He‘s fixed it.
[Mr. Tweedy steps away from it, admiring his handiwork as the machine is now fully functioning.] [enters]
Get the chickens.
Which ones?
All of them. [switches to max level on the pie machine]
[The chickens' plane-building has just been discovered by Mr. Tweedy.]
Me tools! Why, you thieving little buggers!
Bunty [as Ginger is doing literally that]
Nice plan!
[the chickens looks as they drop their tools. Cut to all of them swarming Mr. Tweedy.] [being attacked by the chickens]
MRS. TWEEDY! AHH! MRS. TWEEDY, THE CHICKENS ARE REVOLTING!
Under the hut! [The chickens shove him underneath a hut.]
Alright, Fowler! Ready for take-off!
Behind you all the way!
But... you're supposed to be up there! [points to the cockpit] You're the pilot!
Don't be ridiculous. I can't fly this contraption.
But... but back in your day. The Royal Air Force.
644 Squadron, Poultry Division! We were the mascots.
You mean you never actually FLEW the plane!?
Good heavens, no! I'm a CHICKEN! The Royal Air Force doesn't let chickens behind the controls of complex aircraft!
Hen
[The chickens hear this and start chattering in a panic.]
We're all gonna die!
You have to fly it. You're always talking about back in your day. Well, today is your day!
Bunty You can do it, you old sausage.
[Fowler pulls himself together, stands and salutes.]
Wing Commander T.I. Fowler reporting for duty. [The hens cheer; Fowler impatiently talks over them, heading for the cockpit.] Come on, what are you waiting for? Let's get this crate off the ground!
Fowler, NOW!
[manipulating levers]
Roger! Contact! [Chickens start peddling and the propeller starts spinning, saluting] Cleared for take off! [Three chickens hoist a ramp into place just in front of the fence, then scamper back toward the plane, calling down] Chocks away!
Chickens
Chocks away!
Full throttle! [pulls a lever]
[The wheels bounce along the rocky runway, lifting slightly, then touching back down. On the flying machine.]
We need more power!
I cannae work miracles, Cap'n! We're giving her all she's got!
[The plane continues, wheels bouncing, getting closer and closer to the ramp, picking up speed, when all of a sudden. Willard Tweedy kicks the ramp down.]
Gotcha!
Hard right!
[The plane banks a hard right.]
Oh, mother! [But the tail knocks him in the head and knocks him to the ground. It’s now heading down the opposite direction on the runway.]
Turn it around. I'll get the ramp!
[Ginger leaps off the plane, runs down the runway to the ramp. She struggles and strains to lift it.] [coldly]
Put the ramp down. [ She swings her axe and it wedged into the ramp] You are going to be a pie! [hears a sound of a trike bell ringing] Huh?
[Loud nose occurs, the crate is pulled down slightly and the chickens scream]
Great Scott! What was that?!
A cling-on cap'n! And the engines can't take it!
[rumages through her handbag, throwing out a knit, a toothbrush, a lipstick, before finding the scissors]
Bingo!
Lower me down.
But... Ginger...
Just do it.
Increase velocity!
What does that mean?
Bunty It means PEDAL YOUR FLIPPIN' GIBLETS OUT!!
I'm trying!
GINGER! [She raising her axe. But then Rocky starts firing eggs at Melisha Tweedy]
FIRE! FIRE!
Oh, me eggs. [Ginger loses Babs' scissors]
MORE AMMO, HURRY!
WE'VE GOT NO MORE EGGS!
GINGER! LOOK OUT!
[Snarling. Melisha Tweedy breaks the wire with her axe, and seemingly beheads Ginger]
NOOOOO!!! [after a moment of silence, she ducks and cover Ginger looks up at Melisha Tweedy, completely unharmed]
[Groans. Ginger reveals the severed Christmas lights in front of Melisha Tweedy]
HUH?!
Bye-bye! [Melisha Tweedy screams after her side of the wire is lets go]
BOMBS AWAY!
Oh, that was good, that was GOOD!
The Old Bird bought it! [laughing]
Mrs. Tweedy!, Mrs. Tweed-- [He then sees Melisha Tweedy shrieking and flailing in the blocked-up safety valve; inside, Melisha Tweedy sees the boiling gravy rising. As the machine begins malfunctioning, Willard Tweedy slowly backs away while closing the door, and the pie machine explodes in the distance, creating a mushroom cloud of gravy]
Rocky and Ginger
WHOA!
[Gravy leaks down the door, Willard Tweedy then opens the door to see Melissa Tweedy injured while the two guard dogs are happily licking up the spilt gravy] [his last words]
I told you they were organized. [Melisha Tweedy soon begins growling, and before she's about to reprimand him, she lets out a yelp as the now unsupported door falls flat on her.]
[The chickens continue to celebrate, Mac gives Fowler a big kiss on the cheek, Bunty hugs Babs, Nick tearfully hugs Fetcher, and Ginger grabs Rocky and finally gives him that big kiss. The pedalling chickens stop pedalling.]
KEEP PEDDLING! We’re not there yet! [The plane rises again and sails off toward the sunset] You can’t see paradise if you don’t pedal! Put your drumsticks into it. [hand-flying the plane through the air] That's what I told them, what what. We were losing altitude, you see, and heading for a fearful prang.
Safety is at all times imperative. Now, wind her up and let her go.
