20th century man, doubt.
What are you talking about now?
You me, everybody ... this is why we aren't sure of anything. this is why we feel cut off, drifting. this is why we can't make a commitment .... nothing means anything to us. You see what I mean?
You are saying you don't want to get married?
No, I am saying what I am saying.
I used to do that all the time, you know? I used to ask people stuff like if they were happy or stuff like that. I don't do it any more because it's stupid and none of my business.
We are supposed to be talking!
No, we are not talking.
Ok, we'll talk, talk! ... talk! talk!
Aaaah!
You really make me sick.
Oh, thank you very much!
If I eat, I wanna throw up. If I don't, I get a headache. If I sleep, I have nightmares. If I don't sleep, I get depressed. I can't move. I am stuck on a chair, just going over every word, and it just makes me even sicker.
This is your idea of a conversation?
You think you have free will. You make decisions, you make things happen. According to Marx, this is just behavior, superficial behavior. Underneath this behavior, there are patterns determining our destiny. And, here's the killer ... we have no control over them. No matter what we do, it makes no difference to the path of history.
Want to try and take a house in the beach this summer?
Can we afford it?
... It changes everything.
It's supposed to change everything, Steve.
Love, right? ... But suppose it doesn't last? I got to hang on to what I have besides this ...
I used to wake up ... I'd fall asleep and then I'd be wide awake and I just had to get out of here.
Why?
Not coz it was bad, ok? Coz being here with you, everything else was far away, just gone ... me and my life and everything I do and what I am. I was losing that here. I'd wake up and think "it's gone, I'm gone." I got to get back and see if it's still there. Coz here ... I don't know who I am here.
I'm going crazy...
See, that's different! I thought it was your everyday garden-variety existential crisis. But crazy is different.
Maybe dull is the answer. Maybe dull will last.
Something happened to the world and nobody understood it. It was confusing and people started jumping to conclusions. There are no more absolutes. Time, space, good, evil - the things we know the things we believe in the things we see we thought we understood these things. But maybe we don't, maybe they're all relative.
There used to be reasons for people to be together, like stability, security and maybe even a kid. But you see, I don't need you for the those reasons nowadays. I mean, I can get them on my own now if I wanted to. So ... if there are no real reasons for two people to be together, then you are into unreal reasons, fantastic reasons, like happiness, good company and comfort and understanding and emotional support ... God, you wouldn't ask that much from a saint. So you look at this person and you say ... what the good is this person for anyway?
Who says we want what we think we want? We want what we think we are supposed to want? Like what the books tell us to want. And the movies. That's what I wanted. Happy. Happy, happy, happy. Shit like that, ok? We didn't get that. That's the end of that. Ok? It's not ... the end of us. It's the end of a dream, that's all. You wake up in the morning, the dream's over, so what? We're still here ...
