Claude Oh my stars and strips, Leuben! I cannot believe it is you!
This is Polly.
Claude Hi Polly. I am Claude.
Along Came Polly quotes
Claude Claude
Irving Feffer
It's not about what happened in the past, or what you think might happen in the future. It's about the ride, for Christ's sake. There is no point in going through all this crap, if you are not going to enjoy the ride. And you know what... when you least expect, something great might come along. Something better than you even planned for.
Polly Prince I'm not going to marry you Reuben.
I don't want to get married. I just want to take you to dinner...sometime this week.
Polly Prince Can I pick the place?
(yelps)
Rat! Rat in the house!
Polly Prince : Oh, no, no. This is Rodolfo. He's a ferret.
No, Lisa. I never should've asked you to come down here. I'm not going back together with you.
Lisa Kramer What are you talking about? Why?
"Why?" You screwed a scuba diving instructor on our honeymoon. I mean, what kind of cold heartless bitch would do that to someone they love. I'd have to be an idiot to get back together with you after that. Oh, and by the way, I destroyed all your little throw pillows. Yeah, because throw pillows suck, okay. They serve no purpose, they're purely decorative.
So whose party is this again?
Sandy Lyle It's an art opening for this Dutch guy, Jost. His art sucks, but he used to sell me really good pot. [pause]
Sandy Lyle Oh, man, I'm so friggin' horny.
You're on the non-plan plan!
Polly Prince I am NOT on the non-plan plan!
Sandy Lyle Reuben, I'm in a situation here. We have to leave now.
No. Can we stay a couple more minutes, please?
Sandy Lyle Dude, no. This is serious. I just sharted.
I don't know what that means.
Sandy Lyle I tried to fart and a little shit came out. I just sharted. Now let's go.
You're the most disgusting person I've ever met in my life.
Stan Indursky Good things.
Claude [after Reuben has caught Lisa having an affair with the scuba diving instructor]
It's like zee story of zee heeppo.
I'm not familiar with that story.
Claude Zee heeppopotamoose, he is not born saying, "Cool beans. I am a heeppo." No way, Joesay. So he try to paint zee stripe on him to be like zee zebra, but he fool no one. Then he try to put zee spot on zee skin to be like the leopard, but everyboody know he is a heeppo. So, at certain point, he look himself in zee mirror and he just say, "Hey. I am a heeppopotamoose and zere is nothing I can do about it." As soon as he accepts zis, he live life happy. Happy as a heeppo. You understand zis, Luban?