All That Jazz quotes

View Quote Sometimes, I don't know where the bullshit ends and the truth begins.

View Quote [Katie just finished setting up a dinner date, probably to make Joe jealous.]
Joe Gideon: Who was that?
Katie Jagger: Michael Graham.
Joe Gideon: Who is Michael Graham?
Katie Jagger: A dancer in my ballet class.
Joe Gideon: Straight or gay?
Katie Jagger: What do you mean?
Joe Gideon: I mean, is looking to get laid or is he looking for Mr. Right?
Katie Jagger: He's straight.
Joe Gideon: And tall. [turns to leave] Michael Graham is a very tall name. [leaves his room slowly but comes running back] Ho ho ho... Goddamn you, how dare you use my phone! My telephone! To call someone who is not gay!
Katie Jagger: [laughing] I see! You can go out with any girl in town. Any girl.
Joe Gideon: [pointing] That's right! I go out with any girl in town. I stay in with you.

View Quote Deborah Geffner - Victoria Porter

View Quote [to Audrey] If I die, I'm sorry for all the bad things I did to you. [to Katie] And if I live, I'm sorry for all the bad things I'm gonna do to you.

View Quote Ann Reinking - Kate Jagger

View Quote Ben Vereen - O'Connor Flood

View Quote [repeated line] It's showtime, folks!

View Quote Stop smiling! Lay back! Lay back! Hold it, hold it, hold it. Candy, Casey, very good. You're gonna do it again, Victoria. Gary, Danny, let's go. Stop smiling, it's not the high school play. Count! Hold it. [to Victoria] Stand on your right foot. Point your left toe. Drop the shoulder. Now, that's not too hard, is it? Again!

View Quote Max Wright - Joshua Penn

View Quote Jessica Lange - Angelique

View Quote [last lines, Joe is dying] Hey, at least I won't have to lie to you anymore.

View Quote Leland Palmer - Audrey Paris

View Quote Do you supposed Stanley Kubrick ever gets depressed?

View Quote Roy Scheider - Joe Gideon

View Quote The pain is gone. I'm OK. Nothing wrong with me a rewrite of the show wouldn't cure. A couple of good jokes is what I need.