Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory quotes

View Quote Oompa loompa doompadee doo / I've got another puzzle for you / Oompa loompa doompadah dee / If you are wise you'll listen to me / Who do you blame when your kid is a brat / Pampered and spoiled like a siamese cat / Blaming the kids is a lie and a shame / You know exactly who's to blame / The mother and the father / Oompa loompa doompadee dah / If you're not spoiled then you will go far. / You will live in happiness too / Like the oompa loompa doompadee do.

View Quote [singing] I want the world. I want the whole world. I want to lock it all up in my pocket. It's my bar of chocolate. Give it to me now.

View Quote Willy Wonka: Well, fortunately, small boys are extremely springy and elastic. So I think we'll put him in my special taffy-pulling machine. That should do the trick.
[to an Oompa-Loompa]
Willy Wonka: To the taffy-pulling room. You'll find the boy in his mother's purse. But be extremely careful.
Mrs. Teevee: To the t-t-t... taffy-pulling room? What's he saying?!
[Oompa-Loompa whispers to Wonka]
Willy Wonka: No, no. I won't hold you responsible. [to Mrs. Teevee, who has started babbling incoherently and then fainted] And now, my dearest lady. It's time to say goodbye. No, no, don't speak. For some moments in life there are no words. Run along now.
[The Oompa-Loompas drag her out]

View Quote Bubbles, bubbles, everywhere, and not a drop to drink...yet. [A reference to Coleridge's "The Rime of the Ancient Mariner".]

View Quote Interviewer: So you like the killing [on television]
Mike Teevee: That's what life's all about! But my dad won't let me have a real gun yet, will you, pop?
Mr. Teevee: Not 'till you're twelve, son.

View Quote Willy Wonka: Don't you know what this is?
Violet Beauregarde: By gum, it's gum!
Willy Wonka: Wrong! It's the most amazing, fabulous, sensational gum in the whole world.
Violet Beauregarde: What so fab about that?
Willy Wonka: This little piece of gum is a three course dinner.
Mr. Salt: Bull.
Willy Wonka: No, roast beef. But I haven't got it quite right yet.

View Quote Mrs. Gloop: My son! He'll be made into marshmallows in five seconds!
Willy Wonka: Impossible, my dear lady! That's absurd! Unthinkable!
Mrs. Gloop: Why?!
Willy Wonka: Because that pipe doesn't go to the marshmallow room, it goes to the fudge room.
Mrs. Gloop: You terrible man!

View Quote '[From William Shakespeare's Merchant Of Venice, Act 5, Scene I - Portia - That light we see is burning in my hall. How far that little candle throws his beams! So shines a good deed in a naughty world.

View Quote Veruca Salt: I wanted to be the first to find a Golden Ticket, Daddy.
Mr. Salt: I know, angel. We're doing the best we can. I've got every girl in the bleeding stockroom hunting for you.
Veruca Salt: All right! Where is it?! Why haven't they found it?
Mr. Salt: Veruca, sweetheart. I'm not a magician! Give me time!
Veruca Salt: I want it now! What's the matter with those twerps down there!?
Mr. Salt: For 5 days now, the entire flipping factory's been on the job! They haven't shelled a peanut in there since Monday! They've been shelling flaming chocolate bars from dawn to dusk!
Veruca Salt: Make 'em work nights!

View Quote Computer Inventor: I am now telling the computer exactly what he can do with a lifetime supply of chocolate!

View Quote [singing] Don't care how, I want it now! Don't care how, I want it [plummets down the "bad egg" chute] noooooooooowwwwwwwww.....

View Quote Mr. Salt: Wonka, how much do you want for the golden goose?
Willy Wonka: They're not for sale.
Mr. Salt: Name your price.
Willy Wonka: She can't have one.
Veruca Salt: Who says I can't?!
Mr. Salt: The man with the funny hat.

View Quote All I ask is a tall ship and a star to sail her by. [From "Sea Fever" by John Masefield.]

View Quote [singing] I want a party with roomfuls of laughter, / Ten thousand tons of ice cream, / And if I don't get the things I am after, / I'm going to SCREAM!

View Quote Invention, my dear friends, is 93% perspiration, 6% electricity, 4% evaporation, and 2% butterscotch ripple. [A reference to Thomas Alva Edison's famous aphorism.]