Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby

Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby quotes

142 total quotes (ID: 564)

Cal Naughton, Jr.
Glenn
Jean Girard
Lucius
Multiple Characters
Reese Bobby
Ricky Bobby
Texas Ranger Bobby
Walker Bobby


I'm Ricky Bobby. If you don't chew Big Red, then **** you.


Dear 8 pound 6 ounce Baby Jesus, or as our brothers to the south call you J?sus...we thank you so much for this bountiful harvest of Domino's, KFC, and the always delicious Taco Bell. I just want to take time to say thank you for my family, My two beautiful, beautiful, handsome, striking sons, Walker, and Texas Ranger, or T.R., as we call him. And of course my red hot smokin' wife, Carley, who is a stone cold fox (Cal: MMMMM!), who if you would rate her ass on 100 it would easily be a 94. I also want to thank you for my best friend and teammate, Cal Naughton Jr, Who's got my back no matter what (Cal: Shake and Bake)

Hey losing is never fun but here's a little something to keep your spirits up.... (flips bird) its real nice... got it at Target.... It's on sale.

We missed you at the wedding. It was really classy. We had a Styx cover band, and a nacho fountain. Check it, it was a nacho fountain.

Anarchy! Anarchy! I don't know what it means but I love it!

[getting thrown out of Applebee's] I'm a veteran! And a diabetic! Applebee's has rats! I found a whole rat in my Cobb salad!

Please don't let the invisible fire burn my friend!

[Looking under the hood of his race car] Hot dog! I mean, that's like lookin' up Yasmine Bleeth's skirt!

And now, the matador shall dance with the blind shoemaker!

[driving his first race] Hey, Lucius, I just wanted to share a piece of personal information with you. I've got a...a chubby right now because THIS IS ONE OF THE MOST AWESOME EXPERIENCES OF MY LIFE!! I'M GETTIN' TO DRIVE A RACECAR I CAN'T BELIEVE IT OH MY GOD!!!

We go together like cocaine and waffles.

Hold on a second, Mr. Fancy-Pants Foreigner. You just broke my bro's arm. Now you're gonna get tasered. Say hello to Dr. Watts!

I sent in my application to The Real World, so I'm hoping to hear back from that. I'm putting a lot of my eggs into that basket, the MTV basket. I'm also thinking about getting a gun, and dealing crack. Being a crack dealer. Not, like, a mean crack dealer, but like... like a nice one. Kinda friendly, like, "Hey, what's up guys? You want some crack?". I'm just waiting on those two things to just kinda flesh themselves out.

Ricky, this car is like your Excalibur, the mighty sword King Arthur used to bring together the knights of the roundtable, until Lancelot betrayed him by laying with his queen [whispering] in the biblical sense.

Hi, I'm Ricky Bobby. Christmas is just around the corner, and what better gift to give a loved one [pulls out knife] than the Jack Hawk 9000? Available at Wal-Mart!