(As Sebastian) Eunice! HANDS! hands Eunice, HANDS!

(As Sebastian) So, uh, you play the beautiful game... bros... brothers... brethren?

(As Sebastian) What does you heart tell you?... I mean which one would you rather see NAKEDD!!!

(Blocks goal) That's right. Didn't score on me last half, won't score on this half! I'm a ninja. Ninja Goalie.

(to Viola at kissing booth) Beware the old guy chewing gum...it's not gum.

(To Viola, as Sebastian) Why, why do you always talk about girls in such graphic terms?

'[Viola as Sebastian teaching Duke how to talk to a girl]
Viola Ask me if I like...cheese!
Duke Cheese? Okay...do you like...cheese?
Viola/Sebastian (In girly voice) "Why yes I do, my favorite's gouda

(sees Olivia switch kissing booth places with Viola)
Duke: Just my luck.
(sees look on Viola's face)
Duke: No, no, no, no. I didn't mean it like that. I just mean, she's... you know... Okay. Um, on the other hand you're also...
Viola: I am? Thanks, I guess.
9 Year Old Boy: You don't have to flirt with her first, okay, genius? You're paying for it.

(Soccer Ball hits lower area)
Coach/Duke/toby/Soccer Team:Ohh
Viola/Sebastian: (looks Around) Oh right, owww! ahh! For the love of God! It burns!!

Duke: Okay, why do you have tampons in your boot?
Viola(as Sebastian): Um...I...get really bad nosebleeds?
Andrew: So, you stick them up your nose?
Viola: Yeeeeah, what...you...you've never done that? Oh my, Beckham does it all the time.
Toby: Seriously?
Viola: Look, let me show you how to do it. Take that off, and...whatever that is. And you stick it right in. It absorbs right up!

Sebastian: (indicating Viola's false sideburns) Are those real?
Viola: Oh yeah, I'm growing sideburns now- NO!

Toby: (to Viola as Sebastian)Is you're sister...hott?
Viola: Well, um... she has a GREAT personality.
Duke, Toby, Andrew: Ew.

Toby: I got lady troubles
Viola/Sebastian: I got a lifetime of knowledge

Andrew: Oh my god, Sebastians with Unis! She must be hotter than we thought!
Toby: Ok how come when i wanted to go out with Unis everyone made fun of me and now that sebastians going out with her suddenly Unis is cool? Screw you guys, i hate high school.

Viola/Sebastian: High five, nicee.

[in the dorm room with Duke and Viola as Sebastian]
Viola (as Sebastian): Your the guy... um the bigger guy