School of Rock quotes
35 total quotes
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Ned: [as he opens his mail] What are you all dressed up for?
Dewey: Uh, I got a hot date.
Ned: That's weird. I got a check from Horace Green Prep for $1,200. I've never even worked there. [picks up the phone and starts dialing Horace Green]
Dewey: What are you doing?
Ned: Calling the school. [speaks into phone] Hi, this is Ned Schneebly. Um... [Dewey breaks the call; Ned eyes him suspiciously] Dewey? What's going on?
Dewey: I told them 15 times, make it out to cash!
Ned: [hangs up the phone] Dewey?
Dewey: I did something bad, Ned.
Ned: No...
Dewey: Yeah. They called, looking for a sub, and I said I was you, just to make some money. But then I got there, and the kids--they rock, man! There's this kid, Larry, who's like, "I'm not cool," but now he's like... [scatting] And there's this other girl who can sing like... [humming] But then she thought she was too fat to sing, so they were all dying of this rare blood disease, and then the principal got drunk. And now, we're playing tomorrow at Battle of the Bands! Isn't that great? It's the coolest thing that ever happened! One day, that's all I ask, Ned. And then I will come clean. I'll tell everyone it was my fault, you had nothing to do with it, you'll be fine, one day!
Patty: [walks in] Ned, home.
Dewey: [lowers his voice] Don't say anything to her. Please? She'll blow it. She'll blow everything. Please?
Patty: [walks into the room; looks at Dewey and Ned suspiciously] Hey. What's going on?
Dewey: [casually] Nothing. I got a hot date, that's what's going on. [mouths and makes gestures at Ned to keep quiet] See you later. [leaves]
Patty: What's going on, Ned?
Ned: [grins sheepishly] Nothing.
Patty: Nothing? Well...
Dewey: Uh, I got a hot date.
Ned: That's weird. I got a check from Horace Green Prep for $1,200. I've never even worked there. [picks up the phone and starts dialing Horace Green]
Dewey: What are you doing?
Ned: Calling the school. [speaks into phone] Hi, this is Ned Schneebly. Um... [Dewey breaks the call; Ned eyes him suspiciously] Dewey? What's going on?
Dewey: I told them 15 times, make it out to cash!
Ned: [hangs up the phone] Dewey?
Dewey: I did something bad, Ned.
Ned: No...
Dewey: Yeah. They called, looking for a sub, and I said I was you, just to make some money. But then I got there, and the kids--they rock, man! There's this kid, Larry, who's like, "I'm not cool," but now he's like... [scatting] And there's this other girl who can sing like... [humming] But then she thought she was too fat to sing, so they were all dying of this rare blood disease, and then the principal got drunk. And now, we're playing tomorrow at Battle of the Bands! Isn't that great? It's the coolest thing that ever happened! One day, that's all I ask, Ned. And then I will come clean. I'll tell everyone it was my fault, you had nothing to do with it, you'll be fine, one day!
Patty: [walks in] Ned, home.
Dewey: [lowers his voice] Don't say anything to her. Please? She'll blow it. She'll blow everything. Please?
Patty: [walks into the room; looks at Dewey and Ned suspiciously] Hey. What's going on?
Dewey: [casually] Nothing. I got a hot date, that's what's going on. [mouths and makes gestures at Ned to keep quiet] See you later. [leaves]
Patty: What's going on, Ned?
Ned: [grins sheepishly] Nothing.
Patty: Nothing? Well...
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[The kids have arrived to find No Vacancy, Dewey's old band, on stage]
Dewey: Guys, you don't have to listen to those hacks! Come on, band meeting, right now, gather round. Alright. Frankie, how's security?
Frankie: We're set.
Dewey: Gordon, what about the lights?
Gordon: The light board's up in the balcony. I'll patch it up there.
Dewey: Alright. Okay, now, Billy, how's beautification?
Billy: Are you kidding?
Dewey: Okay, listen up, you guys, we only have one song to let these guys know who we are...so I think we should play Zack's.
Zack: But why? I mean...really?
Dewey: Yes! The thing is, you guys, I ain't that good. I'm not, I can admit it, but, dude, you're ten years old, you're already better than me, your song rocks harder, so let's play it! But hey, you know what? That's just one guy's opinion. This ain't my band, it's our band, we all have a say.
Summer: We haven't practiced that one as much. I mean, we might not win.
Dewey: Hey. We didn't come here to win, we came to play one great show. And on Zack's song, you guys really rock. You know my vote, who else is with me?
(He lowers his hand into the middle of the circle, and the kids place theirs atop it)
Dewey: Alright, let's pray. God of Rock, thank you for this chance to kick butt. We are your humble servants, please give us the power to blow people's minds with our high voltage rock. In your name, we pray. Amen.
All: Amen.
Dewey: Now let's get out there and MELT SOME FACES!
All: Yeah!
Dewey: Guys, you don't have to listen to those hacks! Come on, band meeting, right now, gather round. Alright. Frankie, how's security?
Frankie: We're set.
Dewey: Gordon, what about the lights?
Gordon: The light board's up in the balcony. I'll patch it up there.
Dewey: Alright. Okay, now, Billy, how's beautification?
Billy: Are you kidding?
Dewey: Okay, listen up, you guys, we only have one song to let these guys know who we are...so I think we should play Zack's.
Zack: But why? I mean...really?
Dewey: Yes! The thing is, you guys, I ain't that good. I'm not, I can admit it, but, dude, you're ten years old, you're already better than me, your song rocks harder, so let's play it! But hey, you know what? That's just one guy's opinion. This ain't my band, it's our band, we all have a say.
Summer: We haven't practiced that one as much. I mean, we might not win.
Dewey: Hey. We didn't come here to win, we came to play one great show. And on Zack's song, you guys really rock. You know my vote, who else is with me?
(He lowers his hand into the middle of the circle, and the kids place theirs atop it)
Dewey: Alright, let's pray. God of Rock, thank you for this chance to kick butt. We are your humble servants, please give us the power to blow people's minds with our high voltage rock. In your name, we pray. Amen.
All: Amen.
Dewey: Now let's get out there and MELT SOME FACES!
All: Yeah!
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[Billy has just showed off his completed stage outfits for Katie and Freddy]
Dewey: I dunno... They might be a little distracting...
Billy: It's glitter-rock, and it's glam, and it's fabulous!
Dewey: Billy, it's just not the right style.
Billy: Style? You're gonna talk to me about style? You can't even dress yourself! Look at that bow tie!
Dewey: Don't you be talkin' about my bow tie!
Billy: You know what? I give up, they can just wear their uniforms.
Dewey: That's not a bad idea...
Dewey: I dunno... They might be a little distracting...
Billy: It's glitter-rock, and it's glam, and it's fabulous!
Dewey: Billy, it's just not the right style.
Billy: Style? You're gonna talk to me about style? You can't even dress yourself! Look at that bow tie!
Dewey: Don't you be talkin' about my bow tie!
Billy: You know what? I give up, they can just wear their uniforms.
Dewey: That's not a bad idea...
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Dewey: [half asleep] How'd you guys get in here?
Freddy: Front door was open.
Dewey: Why aren't you guys in school?
Lawrence: We did what you told us. We stuck it to the Man.
Dewey: Forget about everything I told you. Look, I'm a loser, okay? You listen to my advice, you'll end up like me with nothing.
Freddy: Come on, man, quit goofing around. This is serious business. We're on a mission. One great rock show can change the world. [bus horn honks from outside] Look out the window.
[Dewey looks outside to find the school bus with all the other kids calling for him to come down]
Dewey: No way... That is so punk rock...
Freddy: Front door was open.
Dewey: Why aren't you guys in school?
Lawrence: We did what you told us. We stuck it to the Man.
Dewey: Forget about everything I told you. Look, I'm a loser, okay? You listen to my advice, you'll end up like me with nothing.
Freddy: Come on, man, quit goofing around. This is serious business. We're on a mission. One great rock show can change the world. [bus horn honks from outside] Look out the window.
[Dewey looks outside to find the school bus with all the other kids calling for him to come down]
Dewey: No way... That is so punk rock...
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Freddy: I'm just saying, name two great chick drummers.
Katie: Sheila E? Meg White from The White Stripes?
Freddy: She can't drum!
Katie: She's a better drummer than you. At least she has rhythm.
Mullins: Freddy, where are your sleeves? And what have you done to your hair?
Freddy: It's called punk.
Mullins: Well, it's not school uniform. [pulls Freddy's sleeves back down]
Frankie: Miss Mullins, you're The Man.
Mullins: Thank you, Frankie.
[Frankie and some of the other students giggle behind her back.]
Katie: Sheila E? Meg White from The White Stripes?
Freddy: She can't drum!
Katie: She's a better drummer than you. At least she has rhythm.
Mullins: Freddy, where are your sleeves? And what have you done to your hair?
Freddy: It's called punk.
Mullins: Well, it's not school uniform. [pulls Freddy's sleeves back down]
Frankie: Miss Mullins, you're The Man.
Mullins: Thank you, Frankie.
[Frankie and some of the other students giggle behind her back.]
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Dewey: [to the class on his first day] OK, Teach. Teach. Teach. Alright, look, here’s the deal. I’ve got a hangover. Who knows what that means?
Frankie: Doesn't that mean you’re drunk?
Dewey: No. It means I was drunk yesterday.
Freddy: It means you're an alcoholic.
Dewey: Wrong.
Freddy: You wouldn't come to work unless you were an alcoholic. Dude, you got a disease!
Dewey: Mmm-hmm. What's your name?
Freddy: Freddy Jones.
Dewey: Mmm, Freddy Jones, shut up!
Frankie: Doesn't that mean you’re drunk?
Dewey: No. It means I was drunk yesterday.
Freddy: It means you're an alcoholic.
Dewey: Wrong.
Freddy: You wouldn't come to work unless you were an alcoholic. Dude, you got a disease!
Dewey: Mmm-hmm. What's your name?
Freddy: Freddy Jones.
Dewey: Mmm, Freddy Jones, shut up!
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Mullins: Mr. Schneebly... This is considered the best elementary school in the state and we maintain that reputation by adhering to a strict code of conduct, faculty included.
Dewey: You know what? You don't have to worry about me 'cos i'm tough. If a kid gets outta line, I got no problem, smackin' 'em in the head.
Mullins: No. No, we don't use corporal punishment here.
Dewey: Okay, so just... verbal abuse?
Dewey: You know what? You don't have to worry about me 'cos i'm tough. If a kid gets outta line, I got no problem, smackin' 'em in the head.
Mullins: No. No, we don't use corporal punishment here.
Dewey: Okay, so just... verbal abuse?
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Mullins: [about the teachers] They hate me.
Dewey: No, they don't.
Mullins: Yes, they do, I can see. I wasn't always like this, you know, I wasn't always wound this tight. There was a time where I was fun. I was funny! I was. But you can't be funny and be the principal of a prep school! No, you cannot. Because when it comes to their kids, these parents have no sense of humor. No. And if something goes wrong its my head in the smasher. And these parents will come down on me like a nuclear bomb! I can't make a mistake! I gotta be perfect! And that pressure has turned me into something that I never wanted to be...! [mouths "a bitch"]
Dewey: No, you're not.
Mullins: Yes, I am. I am a big one!
Dewey: No, they don't.
Mullins: Yes, they do, I can see. I wasn't always like this, you know, I wasn't always wound this tight. There was a time where I was fun. I was funny! I was. But you can't be funny and be the principal of a prep school! No, you cannot. Because when it comes to their kids, these parents have no sense of humor. No. And if something goes wrong its my head in the smasher. And these parents will come down on me like a nuclear bomb! I can't make a mistake! I gotta be perfect! And that pressure has turned me into something that I never wanted to be...! [mouths "a bitch"]
Dewey: No, you're not.
Mullins: Yes, I am. I am a big one!
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Dewey: If you wanna rock, you gotta break the rules. You gotta get mad at The Man, and right now I'm The Man. That's right, I'm The Man, and who's got the guts to tell me off? Huh? Who's gonna tell me off?
Freddy: Shut up, Schneebly!
Dewey: That's it, Freddy. That's it! Who can top him?
Alicia: Get outta here, stupid.
Dewey: Yes, Alicia.
Summer: You're a joke. You're the worst teacher I've ever had.
Dewey: Summer, that is great. I like the delivery because I felt your anger.
Summer: Thank you.
Lawrence: You're a fat loser, and you have body odor.
Dewey: All right. All right! Now is everyone nice and ticked off?
Class: Yeah!
Dewey: Good! Time to write a rock song! Now what makes you mad more than anything in the world? Billy?
Billy: You.
Dewey: Billy, we've already told me off. Let's move on.
Billy: You're tacky and I hate you.
Dewey: Okay, you see me after class.
Freddy: Shut up, Schneebly!
Dewey: That's it, Freddy. That's it! Who can top him?
Alicia: Get outta here, stupid.
Dewey: Yes, Alicia.
Summer: You're a joke. You're the worst teacher I've ever had.
Dewey: Summer, that is great. I like the delivery because I felt your anger.
Summer: Thank you.
Lawrence: You're a fat loser, and you have body odor.
Dewey: All right. All right! Now is everyone nice and ticked off?
Class: Yeah!
Dewey: Good! Time to write a rock song! Now what makes you mad more than anything in the world? Billy?
Billy: You.
Dewey: Billy, we've already told me off. Let's move on.
Billy: You're tacky and I hate you.
Dewey: Okay, you see me after class.
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Dewey: OK, we are good to go.
Summer: No, we're not. Freddy took off.
Dewey: What? Where?
Summer: Some guys invited him out to their van.
Dewey: WHAT?! Come on, you guys!
Summer: No, we're not. Freddy took off.
Dewey: What? Where?
Summer: Some guys invited him out to their van.
Dewey: WHAT?! Come on, you guys!
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Freddy: Um, are we going to be goofing off like this every day?
Dewey: Uh, we're not goofing off, we're creating musical fusion.
Freddy: Well, are we going to be creating musical fusion every day?
Dewey: Yeah, get used to it.
[Freddy smiles]
Dewey: Uh, we're not goofing off, we're creating musical fusion.
Freddy: Well, are we going to be creating musical fusion every day?
Dewey: Yeah, get used to it.
[Freddy smiles]
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Summer: What's wrong?
Dewey: 'What's wrong?' Summer, didn't you hear we lost?!
Freddy: Chill out, dude. Rock isn't about getting an A. Sex Pistols never won anything.
Lawrence: Don't let the Man get you down.
Zack: You gotta cheer up, we played a great show.
Dewey: We did, didn't we? It was unbelievable, wasn't it?!
Summer: Yeah.
Dewey: 'What's wrong?' Summer, didn't you hear we lost?!
Freddy: Chill out, dude. Rock isn't about getting an A. Sex Pistols never won anything.
Lawrence: Don't let the Man get you down.
Zack: You gotta cheer up, we played a great show.
Dewey: We did, didn't we? It was unbelievable, wasn't it?!
Summer: Yeah.
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Mullins: In your experience, how does Horace Green compare to the other schools that you’ve taught at?
Dewey: Oh, your school is the best.
Mullins: You're just saying that.
Dewey: I'm not. Do you know that kids at other schools just have fun all the time? They're running around. There's no discipline. They're happy. It's anarchy. This is the best school I have ever teached at. I swear.
Dewey: Oh, your school is the best.
Mullins: You're just saying that.
Dewey: I'm not. Do you know that kids at other schools just have fun all the time? They're running around. There's no discipline. They're happy. It's anarchy. This is the best school I have ever teached at. I swear.
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[Dewey and Mullins arrive at Horace Green for Parents' Night]
Dewey: Okay, I don't think I can go in there.
Mullins: What's wrong?
Dewey: Roz... I'm not a teacher.
Mullins: Oh, Ned, a substitute is a teacher.
Dewey: No, no, I'm not a teacher. I'm a fraud.
Mullins: No! You're not! You're a dedicated, talented teacher, and those parents are gonna love you! Now, just get in there, and tell those parents what you've been teaching their kids.
Dewey: Okay, I don't think I can go in there.
Mullins: What's wrong?
Dewey: Roz... I'm not a teacher.
Mullins: Oh, Ned, a substitute is a teacher.
Dewey: No, no, I'm not a teacher. I'm a fraud.
Mullins: No! You're not! You're a dedicated, talented teacher, and those parents are gonna love you! Now, just get in there, and tell those parents what you've been teaching their kids.
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[The entire class is depressed after learning the truth about Dewey and the Battle of the Bands]
Michelle: So, his name really wasn't Mr. Schneebly?
Freddy: Nah, it was, like, Dewey somethin'...
Marco: What about the project?
Frankie: Wake up, Marco. There was no project.
Zack: He just wanted us to play a show so we could make some money.
Summer: I can't believe we weren't getting graded on any of this.
Freddy: What are you so bummed about? We had a three week vacation. Yeah, it was a waste of time, but it was a lot better than school.
Lawrence: It was not a waste of time.
Freddy: Hate to break it to you, bro, but yeah, that's what it was.
Lawrence: You're an idiot.
Freddy: Hey, shut up!
Lawrence: No, you shut up!
Freddy: Hey, you wanna go?!
Tomika: [stands up in Lawrence's defense] Hey, if you touch him, I'll shove those sticks down your throat, got it?! [Freddy retreats] [to class] Mr. S was cool. We worked too long and hard not to play the show!
Freddy: Okay, so what are we supposed to do?
Alicia: I say we get out of here and play the show.
Michelle: So, his name really wasn't Mr. Schneebly?
Freddy: Nah, it was, like, Dewey somethin'...
Marco: What about the project?
Frankie: Wake up, Marco. There was no project.
Zack: He just wanted us to play a show so we could make some money.
Summer: I can't believe we weren't getting graded on any of this.
Freddy: What are you so bummed about? We had a three week vacation. Yeah, it was a waste of time, but it was a lot better than school.
Lawrence: It was not a waste of time.
Freddy: Hate to break it to you, bro, but yeah, that's what it was.
Lawrence: You're an idiot.
Freddy: Hey, shut up!
Lawrence: No, you shut up!
Freddy: Hey, you wanna go?!
Tomika: [stands up in Lawrence's defense] Hey, if you touch him, I'll shove those sticks down your throat, got it?! [Freddy retreats] [to class] Mr. S was cool. We worked too long and hard not to play the show!
Freddy: Okay, so what are we supposed to do?
Alicia: I say we get out of here and play the show.