Napoleon Dynamite

Napoleon Dynamite quotes

79 total quotes (ID: 411)

Napoleon Dynamite
Uncle Rico

Napoleon: [entering convenience store] Hey, how's it goin'? Those egg rolls are looking pretty good. I might get me some later, I don't have any money right now. You know, I think I'm just gonna get me one of them lotto tickets. My wife says I gotta stop but I'm just feeling real positive today and I wanted to try out my luck and —
Cashier: I think you'd better get back to class. I don't sell lotto tickets to minors.
Napoleon: I'm just gonna go get my ID. [bumps into cooler]
Napoleon: [outside, to Pedro] Gosh! They wouldn't sell me one. I don't look old enough. Dang!
Pedro: Do you think I look old enough?
Pedro: [in store] Un lotto ticket, por favor.
[the Cashier looks at Pedro's mustache, then sells him a ticket.]
Napoleon: [outside, scratching ticket] Yes! Three spuds! You picked a good one! That's ten dollars! Yes!

Napoleon: Are you guys are, like, Pedro's cousins with all the sweet hook-ups?
Cholo #1: Si món. [translates from Spanish to "Heck yeah"]

Napoleon: [drinks a glass of milk] The defect in that one is bleach.
FFA Judge No. 1: That's right.
Napoleon: Yessssss.
Napoleon: [drinks second glass of milk] This tastes like the cow got into an onion patch.
FFA Judge No. 2: Correct.
Napoleon: Yessssss.

Nunchaku skills... bowhunting skills... computer hacking skills... Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills!

That one looks like a medieval warrior.

I caught you a delicious bass.

Do the chickens have large talons?

Pedro offers you his protection.

Yeah, hold on... I forgot to put in the crystals.

Yeah, there's like a butt-load of gangs at this school. This one gang kept wanting me to join 'cause I'm pretty good with a bo staff.

[To Deb] I see you're drinking 1%. Is that 'cause you think you're fat? Because you're not. You could be drinking whole if you wanted to. Well, I have all your equipment in my locker. You should probably come get it cause I can't fit my nunchakus in there anymore.

[While hitting a tetherball repeatedly] YES! YES! YES!

[To Trisha over the phone] It took me, like, 3 hours to finish the shading on your upper lip. It's pretty much the best drawing I've ever done.

Are you guys having a killer time?

[To Deb] I like your sleeves... they're real big.