Judge Haller: Counselor, your clients are charged with first degree murder. How do they plead?
Vinny: [sitting down] Your Honor, my clients...
Judge Haller: Don't talk to me sitting in that chair.
Vinny: But he [points to bailiff] told me to sit here.
Judge Haller: When you're addressed in this court, you'll rise. Speak to me in a clear, intelligible voice.
...
Vinny: My clients...
Judge Haller: What are you wearing?
Vinny: Huh?
Judge Haller: What are you wearing?
Vinny: [wearing a leather jacket] Um, I'm wearing clothes.
[Judge stares ominously]
Vinny: I... I don't get the question.
Judge Haller: When you come into my court looking like you do. You not only insult me, but you insult the integrity of this court.
Vinny: I apologize, sir, but, uh... this is how I dress.
Judge Haller: The next time you appear in my court, you will look lawyerly. And I mean you comb your hair, and wear a suit and tie. And that suit had better be made out of some sort of... cloth. You understand me?
Vinny: Uh yes. Fine, Judge, fine.
...
Vinny: My clients were caught completely by surprise. They thought they were getting arrested for shoplifting a can of tuna.
Judge Haller: What are you telling me? That they plead not guilty?
Vinny: No. I'm just trying to explain.
Judge Haller: I don't want to hear explanations. The state of Alabama has a procedure. And that procedure is to have an arraignment. Are we clear on this?
Vinny: Yes, but there seems to be a great deal of confusion here. You see, my clients...
Judge Haller: Uh, Mr. Gambini?
[Motions for him to approach the bench]
Judge Haller: All I ask from you is a very simple answer to a very simple question. There are only two ways to answer it: guilty or not guilty.
Vinny: But your honor, my clients didn't do anything.
Judge Haller: Once again, the communication process broken down. It appears to me that you want to skip the arraignment process, go directly to trial, skip that, and get a dismissal. Well, I'm not about to revamp the entire judicial process just because you find yourself in the unique position of defending clients who say they didn't do it.
...
Judge Haller: The next words out of your mouth better be "guilty" or "not guilty." I don't want to hear commentary, argument, or opinion. If I hear anything other than "guilty" or "not guilty", you'll be in contempt. I don't even want to hear you clear your throat. Now, how do your clients plead?
Vinny: I think I get the point.
Judge Haller: No, I don't think you do. You're now in contempt of court.
Judge Haller:Would you like to go for two counts.
Vinny: Not guilty.
Judge Haller: Thank you.
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