MASH quotes

44 total quotes

Col. Blake
Duke
Hawkeye

Hot Lips
Multiple Characters
Painless
Trapper John

View Quote Take care of the squirrels.

View Quote Baby we're gonna see some stitching like you never saw before.

View Quote Ever since the dark days before Pearl Harbor, I have been proud to wear this uniform.

View Quote [In the middle of sex] Oh, Frank, strangle me!

View Quote It's a good thing you have a nice body, nurse, otherwise they'd get rid of you quick.

View Quote [Proudly] I like to think of the army as my home!

View Quote [During football game] All right bud, your ****ing head is coming right off!

View Quote If a man isn't a man anymore... what's he got left that he should be living for?

View Quote Let's give him a sexy scar, huh? Fantastic

View Quote How do ya like them apples, Charlie?

View Quote Frank, were you on this religious kick at home, or did you crack up over here?

View Quote [While making out]
Lt. Dish: I made a vow to myself that while I was gone, I was going to be-- I was going to be faithful to my husband.
Hawkeye: Those are the vows you make when you're with somebody.

View Quote [Referring to Major Houlihan]
Trapper John: Well, what's the matter with her today?
Hawkeye: Oh, I don't know. I think it's one of those ladies' things.
Trapper John: It's not like her to act like this. She's a bitch. Look at my new flannel-- I think she's going to have a nervous breakdown.
Hawkeye: She can't even get out of the door.

View Quote Alright men, we're not here to sell lemonade, we're here to practice!