Kung Fu Panda

Kung Fu Panda quotes

81 total quotes (ID: 326)

Master Tigress
Oogway
Po
Shifu
Tai Lung


Tigress: It is said that the Dragon Warrior can survive for months at a time on nothing but the dew of a single Ginko leaf and the energy of the universe.
Po: I guess my body doesn't know it's the Dragon Warrior yet, heh heh. I'mma need a lot more than dew, and, uh, universe juice. (he slurps his noodles, with one hanging over his nose; everyone laughs) What?
Mantis: Oh, nothing, ...Master Shifu. (everyone laughs again.)
Po (impersonating Master Shifu): You will never be the Dragon Warrior unless you lose 500 pounds and brush your teeth. (The Furious Five, except Tigress, laugh) What is that noise you're making? Laughter? I have never heard of it! Work hard, Panda, and maybe someday you will have ears like mine! (he brings two bowls up to his head to mimic ears; the Furious Five laugh, but stop and see Shifu behind Po) Ears. It's not working for ya? I thought they're pretty good...
Monkey (whispering): It's Shifu!
Po: Of course it's Shifu, who do you think I'm doing? (Monkey points to the door. Po looks and sees Shifu.)
Po: Oh, Master Shifu! Uh.... (Slurps the noodle and accidently presses the bowls to his chest so he looks like he has on a bikini bottom top. The Five laugh.)
Shifu: (Agrily) You think this is funny?


Po: Lets just start at zero; Level Zero.
Shifu: Oh no. There is no such thing as Level Zero.
Po: Hey! Maybe I can start on that! (Walks over to the punching bag-like object)
Shifu: That? We use that for training children and propping the door open when it's hot!
Po: Perfect! (Notices the Furious Five watching him with curious expressions) Eh... you just want me to wait until they go back on their own thing or...
Shifu: Never mind them, go on, hit it.
Po: Eh...okay...(Starts doing quick movements with his feet and mumbling to himself)
Shifu: Would you hit it?!
Po: Right....(Taps it, making it wobble)
Shifu: Why don't you try again? A little harder?
Po: Right...(Hits it harder, making it lean back a lot) How's th-- (is hit by it and sent flying into the moving ropes and swinging pendulums, only to be thrusted into Crane's tilting bowl, hitting his head several times until it tips over into the moving arm guard section, where it sets off a chain reaction that causes one to hit him in the groin) Ooooo-hoo-hoo! My tenders...(Slowly starts to move, activating the arms and smacking him into the fire floor area. The camera pans back to Shifu and the Furious Five, and we hear the fire activate and Po screaming. He slumps over next to Shifu, burnt and charred) How did I do?
Shifu: There is now a Level Zero. (Puts out a flame on top of Po's head)

Oogway: Look at this tree, Shifu. (Indicates the Peach Tree of Heavenly Wisdom) I cannot make it blossom when it suits me, nor make it bear fruit before its time.
Shifu: But there are things we can control! (Slams a fist into the tree, making several peaches fall around them) I can control where the fruit will fall! (Catches a peach, cuts it in half, takes the pit and slams it into the ground) And I can control where to plant the seed! That is no illusion, Master!
Oogway: Ah, yes. But no matter what you do, that seed will grow to be a peach tree. You may wish for an apple or an orange, but you will get a peach.
Shifu: But a peach cannot defeat Tai Lung!
Oogway: Maybe it can - if you are willing to guide it, to nurture it, to believe in it.

(Po had grabbed some rubble from a plate Tigress just broke)
Shifu: Put that down! The only souvenirs we collect here are bloody knuckles and broken bones!

Shifu: Our only hope is the Dragon Warrior.
Tigress: The panda?
Shifu: Yes, the panda!
Tigress: Master, please! [pushes her chair out] Let us stop Tai Lung. This is what you've trained us for!
Shifu: No! It is not your destiny to defeat Tai Lung, it is his! [points at Po, then realizes he's not there] Where'd he go? [cut to where Po is running down the stairs, screaming, only to be stopped by Shifu] You cannot leave! A real warrior never quits!
Po: Watch me! [tries to run down the stairs, but Shifu uses the stick to turn Po around] Come on! How am I supposed to beat Tai Lung? I can't even beat you to the stairs!
Shifu: You will beat him because you are the Dragon Warrior! [pokes Po in his stomach]
Po: Ow! You don't believe that! [Shifu swipes at his hand with Oogway's stick] Ooh! You never believed that! From the first moment I got here, you've been trying to get rid of me! [Shifu knocks him to the ground]
Shifu: Yes! I was! But now I ask you to trust in your master... as I have come to trust in mine.
Po: You're not my master. And I'm not the Dragon Warrior.
Shifu: Then why didn't you quit? You knew I was trying to get rid of you, yet you stayed!
Po: Yeah, I stayed. I stayed because every time you threw a brick on my head or said I smelled, it hurt, but it could never hurt more than I did every day of my life just being me. I stayed because I thought if anyone could change me, could make me... not me, it was you! The greatest kung fu teacher in all of China!
Shifu: But I can change you! I can turn you into the Dragon Warrior! And I will!
Po: Come on! Tai Lung is on his way here right now! And even if it takes him a hundred years to get here, how are you gonna change this into the Dragon Warrior? Huh? How?... How?... How?!?
Shifu: I don't know!! [sighs] I don't know...
Po: [sighs and frowns sadly] That's what I thought.

Po: [After defeating Tai Lung] No, Master, I didn't die... I defeated Tai Lung!
Shifu: You did? (Po nods and smiles.) Wow...It is just as Oogway...foretold... You are the Dragon Warrior. You have brought peace... to this valley... And... and to me... Thank you... Thank you... Po... Thank you... Thank you... [Slowly lays his head down, as if dead]
Po: No! Master! No, no, no! Don't die Shifu! Please!
Shifu (angrily): I'm not dying, you idiot! - Er, I mean, Dragon Warrior... I am simply at peace... Finally.

Oogway: [walking towards Po] I see you have found the Sacred Peach Tree of Heavenly Wisdom!
Po: [Po turns around with a lot of peaches stuffed in his mouth] Oh! Is that what this is? I'm so sorry! I just thought it was a regular peach tree!

(Shifu walks in to see Po in the kitchen, having just punched through a clear stone cupboard and is currently eating its contents) Po: (Sees Shifu and stops; Shifu looks around the kitchen) ...What? (angrily now) I eat when I'm upset, okay?
Shifu: (Getting inspiration) Oh, no need to explain. I just thought you might be Monkey... He hides his almond cookies on the top shelf. (Pretends to walk off and leans against the wall beside the doorway, hearing a bit of scuffling. When he looks in, Po is 10 feet above the ground, doing a perfect split to keep himself airborne and is currently shoveling Monkey's almond cookies into his face. After a minute, Po sees Shifu)
Po: (with cookies in his mouth) ...Don't tell Monkey...

There is a saying. Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why we call it the present.

Po (in awe): No! The legendary Urn of Whispering Warriors; said to contain the souls of the entire Tenshu Army! [pauses before whispering] Hello?
Shifu: Have you finished sight-seeing? [Po gasps]
Po:(Thinks the urn is talking to him) Sorry, I should've come to see you first.
Shifu: My patience has worn thin.
Po: Oh, well it's not like you were going anywhere.
Shifu: Would you please turn around?
Po: [Turns to the left a bit] Hey, how's it going?

(To Zeng) I'm glad Shifu sent you. I was beginning to think I'd been forgotten. Fly back there and tell them the real Dragon Warrior...is coming home.

Shifu: When you focus on kung fu, when you concentrate... you stink. [Po frowns] But perhaps that is my fault. I cannot train you the way I have trained the Five. I now see that the way to get through to you is with this. [pulls out a bowl of dumplings]
Po: Oh great, 'cause I am hungry!
Shifu: [laughs] Good. When you have been trained, you may eat. Let's begin.
Shifu: But a peach cannot defeat Tai Lung!
Oogway: Maybe it can. If you are willing to guide it, to nurture it, to believe in it.
Shifu: But how? How?! I need your help, Master.
Oogway: No. You just need to believe. Promise me Shifu. Promise me you will believe.
Shifu: I...I will...try.
Oogway: Good. (Looks around at the peach tree petals floating around him.) My time has come. (Hands Shifu his staff.) You must continue your journey, without me.

(Performing Wuxi Finger Hold) You know what's the hardest part of this? The hardest part, is cleaning up afterwards.

(smugly) Oh, you know this hold?

Oogway: There are no accidents.
Shifu: [Sighs] Yes, I know. You said that already. Twice.
Oogway: Well, that was no accident either.
Shifu: Thrice.