Shifu quotes from Kung Fu Panda (2008)

Shifu

When you focus on Kung Fu... when you concentrate... you stink.

Shifu

That flabby panda is not the Dragon Warrior!

Shifu

You have done well, Panda.

Shifu

I'm not dying, you idiot! Er, I mean, Dragon Warrior... I am simply at peace. Finally.

Shifu

Po, you're alive?... Or we're both dead.

Shifu

Do you want to learn Kung fu?

Shifu

Let's begin.

Shifu

Our only hope is the Dragon Warrior.

Shifu

You cannot leave! A real warrior never quits!

Shifu

The rest of you, evacuate the valley. You must protect the villagers from Tai Lung's rage.

Shifu

You were not meant to be the Dragon Warrior! That was not my fault!

Shifu

That? We use that for training children, and for propping the door open when it's hot. But, if you insist...

Shifu

Dragon Warrior- has taken scroll halfway across China by now... You will never see that scroll, Tai Lung. Never. Never...

Shifu

Zeng! Fly to Chorh-Gom Prison and tell them to double the guards and soldiers, double their weapons, double everything! Tai Lung does not leave that prison!

Shifu

Citizens of the Valley of Peace, it's my great honor to present you, Tigress, Viper, Crane, Monkey and Mantis! The Furious Five!

Shifu

Would whoever is making that flapping sound, quiet down?!

Shifu

Put that down! The only souvenirs we collect here are bloody knuckles and broken bones!

Oogway

There are no accidents.

Shifu

Yes, I know. You said that already. Twice.

Oogway

Well, that was no accident either.

Shifu

Thrice.

Po

Lets just start at zero; Level Zero.

Shifu

Oh no. There is no such thing as Level Zero.

Po

Hey! Maybe I can start on that! (Walks over to the punching bag-like object)

Shifu

That? We use that for training children and propping the door open when it's hot!

Po

Perfect! (Notices the Furious Five watching him with curious expressions) Eh... you just want me to wait until they go back on their own thing or...

Shifu

Never mind them, go on, hit it.

Po

Eh...okay...(Starts doing quick movements with his feet and mumbling to himself)

Shifu

Would you hit it?!

Po

Right....(Taps it, making it wobble)

Shifu

Why don't you try again? A little harder?

Po

Right...(Hits it harder, making it lean back a lot) How's th-- (is hit by it and sent flying into the moving ropes and swinging pendulums, only to be thrusted into Crane's tilting bowl, hitting his head several times until it tips over into the moving arm guard section, where it sets off a chain reaction that causes one to hit him in the groin) Ooooo-hoo-hoo! My tenders...(Slowly starts to move, activating the arms and smacking him into the fire floor area. The camera pans back to Shifu and the Furious Five, and we hear the fire activate and Po screaming. He slumps over next to Shifu, burnt and charred) How did I do?

Shifu

There is now a Level Zero. (Puts out a flame on top of Po's head)

Po

...What? (angrily now) I eat when I'm upset, okay?

Shifu

Oh, no need to explain. I just thought you might be Monkey... He hides his almond cookies on the top shelf. (Pretends to walk off and leans against the wall beside the doorway, hearing a bit of scuffling. When he looks in, Po is 10 feet above the ground, doing a perfect split to keep himself airborne and is currently shoveling Monkey's almond cookies into his face. After a minute, Po sees Shifu)

Po

...Don't tell Monkey...

Tigress

It is said that the Dragon Warrior can survive for months at a time on nothing but the dew of a single Ginko leaf and the energy of the universe.

Po

I guess my body doesn't know it's the Dragon Warrior yet, heh heh. I'mma need a lot more than dew, and, uh, universe juice. (he slurps his noodles, with one hanging over his nose; everyone laughs) What?

Mantis

Oh, nothing, ...Master Shifu. (everyone laughs again.)
Po (impersonating Master Shifu): You will never be the Dragon Warrior unless you lose 500 pounds and brush your teeth. (The Furious Five, except Tigress, laugh) What is that noise you're making? Laughter? I have never heard of it! Work hard, Panda, and maybe someday you will have ears like mine! (he brings two bowls up to his head to mimic ears; the Furious Five laugh, but stop and see Shifu behind Po) Ears. It's not working for ya? I thought they're pretty good...
Monkey (whispering): It's Shifu!

Po

Of course it's Shifu, who do you think I'm doing? (Monkey points to the door. Po looks and sees Shifu.)

Po

Oh, Master Shifu! Uh.... (Slurps the noodle and accidently presses the bowls to his chest so he looks like he has on a bikini bottom top. The Five laugh.)

Shifu

You think this is funny?

Oogway

Look at this tree, Shifu. (Indicates the Peach Tree of Heavenly Wisdom) I cannot make it blossom when it suits me, nor make it bear fruit before its time.

Shifu

But there are things we can control! (Slams a fist into the tree, making several peaches fall around them) I can control where the fruit will fall! (Catches a peach, cuts it in half, takes the pit and slams it into the ground) And I can control where to plant the seed! That is no illusion, Master!

Oogway

Ah, yes. But no matter what you do, that seed will grow to be a peach tree. You may wish for an apple or an orange, but you will get a peach.

Shifu

But a peach cannot defeat Tai Lung!

Oogway

Maybe it can - if you are willing to guide it, to nurture it, to believe in it.

Shifu (calmly): You are free to eat.

Po

AM I !?

Shifu

ARE YOU !? (Chopstick battle begins)

Shifu

Our only hope is the Dragon Warrior.

Tigress

The panda?

Shifu

Yes, the panda!

Tigress

Master, please! [pushes her chair out] Let us stop Tai Lung. This is what you've trained us for!

Shifu

No! It is not your destiny to defeat Tai Lung, it is his! [points at Po, then realizes he's not there] Where'd he go? [cut to where Po is running down the stairs, screaming, only to be stopped by Shifu] You cannot leave! A real warrior never quits!

Po

Watch me! [tries to run down the stairs, but Shifu uses the stick to turn Po around] Come on! How am I supposed to beat Tai Lung? I can't even beat you to the stairs!

Shifu

You will beat him because you are the Dragon Warrior! [pokes Po in his stomach]

Po

Ow! You don't believe that! [Shifu swipes at his hand with Oogway's stick] Ooh! You never believed that! From the first moment I got here, you've been trying to get rid of me! [Shifu knocks him to the ground]

Shifu

Yes! I was! But now I ask you to trust in your master... as I have come to trust in mine.

Po

You're not my master. And I'm not the Dragon Warrior.

Shifu

Then why didn't you quit? You knew I was trying to get rid of you, yet you stayed!

Po

Yeah, I stayed. I stayed because every time you threw a brick on my head or said I smelled, it hurt, but it could never hurt more than I did every day of my life just being me. I stayed because I thought if anyone could change me, could make me... not me, it was you! The greatest kung fu teacher in all of China!

Shifu

But I can change you! I can turn you into the Dragon Warrior! And I will!

Po

Come on! Tai Lung is on his way here right now! And even if it takes him a hundred years to get here, how are you gonna change this into the Dragon Warrior? Huh? How?... How?... How?!?

Shifu

I don't know!! [sighs] I don't know...

Po

That's what I thought.

Po (in awe): No! The legendary Urn of Whispering Warriors; said to contain the souls of the entire Tenshu Army! [pauses before whispering] Hello?

Shifu

Have you finished sight-seeing? [Po gasps]

Po

Sorry, I should've come to see you first.

Shifu

My patience has worn thin.

Po

Oh, well it's not like you were going anywhere.

Shifu

Would you please turn around?

Po

Hey, how's it going?

Shifu

Master, master! I have... it- it's very bad news!!

Oogway

Ah, Shifu. There is just news- there is no good or bad.

Shifu

Master, your vision- your vision was right! Tai Lung has broken out of prison! He's on his way! (pause)

Oogway

That is bad news. If you do not believe that the Dragon Warrior can stop him.

Po

No, Master, I didn't die... I defeated Tai Lung!

Shifu

You did? (Po nods and smiles.) Wow...It is just as Oogway...foretold... You are the Dragon Warrior. You have brought peace... to this valley... And... and to me... Thank you... Thank you... Po... Thank you... Thank you... [Slowly lays his head down, as if dead]

Po

No! Master! No, no, no! Don't die Shifu! Please!
Shifu (angrily): I'm not dying, you idiot! - Er, I mean, Dragon Warrior... I am simply at peace... Finally.

Po

...Wanna get something to eat?

Shifu

Yeah.

Shifu

When you focus on kung fu, when you concentrate... you stink. [Po frowns] But perhaps that is my fault. I cannot train you the way I have trained the Five. I now see that the way to get through to you is with this. [pulls out a bowl of dumplings]

Po

Oh great, 'cause I am hungry!

Shifu

Good. When you have been trained, you may eat. Let's begin.

Shifu

But a peach cannot defeat Tai Lung!

Oogway

Maybe it can. If you are willing to guide it, to nurture it, to believe in it.

Shifu

But how? How?! I need your help, Master.

Oogway

No. You just need to believe. Promise me Shifu. Promise me you will believe.

Shifu

I...I will...try.

Oogway

Good. (Looks around at the peach tree petals floating around him.) My time has come. (Hands Shifu his staff.) You must continue your journey, without me.

Shifu

Well done, students...if you were trying to disappoint me. [points his flute at the Five, all bowing respectfully as he mentions their name] Tigress, you need more ferocity! Monkey, greater speed! Crane, height! Viper, subtlety! Mantis...!

Zeng

Master Shifu.

Shifu

What?!

Zeng

It's Master Oogway. He wants to see you.

Oogway

I have had a vision: Tai Lung will return.

Shifu

That is impossible! He is in prison!

Shifu

But who? Who is worthy to be trusted with the secret to limitless power? To become...the Dragon Warrior?

Oogway

I don't know.

Shifu

Focus.

Po

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Shifu

Read it, Po and fulfill your destiny. Read it and become the Dragon Warrior.

Po

Whoa, it's impossible to open. Okay, come on baby, come on now. Thank you. I probably loosened it up for you, though. Okay, here goes. [starts unrolling the scroll, and once he's finished, he screams in terror, startling the Five] ... It's blank.

Shifu

What?

Po

Here, look.

Shifu

No, I forbid to look upon...! [stops himself; looks at the scroll] Blank. I don't...I don't understand.

Po

Okay. So, like, Oogway was just a crazy old turtle, after all.

Shifu

No. Oogway was wiser than us all.

Po

Oh, come on! Face it, he picked me by accident. Of course I'm not the Dragon Warrior. [sits on the floor; disappointed] Who am I kidding?

Tigress

But who will stop Tai Lung?

Crane

He'll destroy everything and everyone.

Shifu

No. Evacuate the valley. You must protect the villagers from Tai Lung's rage.

Tigress

What about you, Master?

Shifu

I will fight him.

Po

What?

Shifu

I can hold him off long enough for everyone to escape.

Po

But, Shifu, he'll kill you.

Shifu

Then I will finally have paid for my mistake. Listen to me, all of you. It is time for you to continue your journey without me. I am very proud to have been your master. [salutes Po and The Five and they salute in return]