Good Morning, Vietnam

Good Morning, Vietnam quotes

71 total quotes (ID: 248)

Adrian Cronauer
Edward Garlick
General Taylor
Lieutenant Hauk
Multiple Characters
Sgt. Major Dickerson


Jimmy Wah: [About Hong Kong] Home of the shiiiny green suit.


Goooooooood morning, Vietnam! Hey, this is not a test! This is rock-'n'-roll! Time to rock it from the Delta to the DMZ! Is that me, or does that sound like an Elvis Presley movie?

Nixon: Therefore, there is no place for neutrality or a neutralist sentiment in South Vietnam. As I leave Vietnam today there is no doubt, certainly, in my mind that the Viet Cong will be defeated and this war will be won. Asia does involve, I think, very appropriately as you have suggested, give and take.
Adrian: Well I-- I really didn't make that suggestion, sir, I'm sorry.
Nixon: The United States has no right to give--
Hauk: Why would Cronauer's voice be on this tape?
Abersold: I don't know, Lieutenant.
Nixon: --territory to the communists.
Adrian: Mr. Nixon, thank you for that concise political commentary, but I think I'd like to delve into something slightly more personal for the men in the field. How would you describe your testicles?
[Hauk turns to the radio in horror]
Nixon: That they're soft, and that they're shallow and they have no purpose.
Hauk: Oh, my God.
Adrian: What are you saying, sir?
Hauk: Oh, my God.
Nixon: That they lack the physical strength.
Adrian: How would you describe your sex life with your wife Pat?
Nixon: It is unexciting sometimes.
Adrian: Well, have you considered, possibly, a sex change. There is an operation that can transform you
Hauk: Please don't do this to me. Please don't do this to me.
Adrian: --into a female Great Dane or possibly a very well hung Chihuahua. Mr. Nixon, while you've been in Vietnam, its rumored that you've smoked marijuana. Are you planning to take some of the marijuana home back to the United States? How would you do that?
Nixon: By plane. By helicopter and also by automobile.

[To Jimmy Wah] James! Nice, shiny green suit. You look like an Oriental leprechaun.

Dreiwitz: What is the appeal of Joey Bishop? I mean, the man's not funny. I know funny, and he's not funny. Don't get me wrong- he seems like a nice guy- but my father's a nice guy and he's not funny either. Joey Bishop. I wish someone would explain this one to me.

Oh, Edward, Edward, you don't understand. I've been on a small Greek island with a lotta women who look like Zorba. I never thought I'd find women attractive ever again, and now that I do you won't even turn the car around? [scoffs] Thanks a lot.

[To Srg. Major Dickerson] You know, you're in more dire need of a blowjob than any white man in history.

It doesn't make a damn whether you play polkas or don't play polkas. Military politics. Nothing personal. The men just like him better than they do you.

Military intelligence? There's a contradiction in terms.

Trinh: I-- I not can do this, Cronow. No. No friend, Cronow. Not good for-- for me. My brother, OK, friends. But Vietnam ladies not friends. Please, OK? Not friends.

It's unbelievable. Five months in Saigon and my best friend turns out to be a VC. THIS WILL NOT LOOK GOOD ON A RESUME!

I understand you're pretty funny as a DJ, and, well comedy is a kind of hobby of mine. Well, actually, it's a little more than just a hobby. Reader's Digest is considering publishing two of my jokes.

Adrian: You could get in trouble for that.
Garlick: I requisitioned for a name change. Trouble is actually my new middle name.

Garlick: Gentlemen! Hey guys, guess who the hell I got in here.
Man 1: Groucho Marx!
Man 2: Senator Dirksen.
Man 3: Curly!
Garlick: Come on. Come on, come on, come on! Guess again.
Adrian: Oh bag it, bag it, Garlick.
Garlick: The fellow I got in here is the gentleman, the one and the only
Adrian: Oh, you're a dead man.
Garlick: The king of the airwaves, Adrian Cronauer.

Dickerson: [Pointing to his rank insignia] What does three up and three down mean to you, Airman?
Adrian: End of an inning?