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Gideon: Goddamn creatures of the night. They never learn

Detective Torres: Don't any of your street demons have real grown-up names?

Albrecht: Oh great! Great! Guy shows up looking like a mime from hell and you lose him, right out in the open. Well, at least he didn't do that 'walking against the wind' shit. I hate that.

Detective Torres: I've got a goddamn vigilante killer out there knocking off scum bags left and right, and you're covering up for somebody.

Albrecht: So many cops, you'd think they were giving away donuts!

Albrecht: You Sarah?
[Sarah nods]
Albrecht: Yeah, look. Your sister-- She's gonna be okay.
Sarah: She's not my sister. Shelly just takes care of me. She's my friend. Her and Eric. You lied to her about Eric.
Albrecht: Look, I had to.
Sarah: And you're lying to me about Shelly. She's gonna die, isn't she?

Albrecht: How do you steer that thing on a wet street?
Sarah: Pure talent.

Tin Tin: Pussies drink last, man
Skank: [Puts gun to Tin Tin's head] **** you Tin Tin
Tin Tin: [Puts a knife to Skank's throat] Hey… shit aint even loaded, man.
Fun Boy: [Puts his gun to Tin Tin's head] This one is.
T-Bird: [Points his gun at all three of them] Which of you motor city mother ****ers wants to bet me this one isn't?

Eric: [After breaking into Gideon's pawn shop] "Suddenly, I heard a tapping, as of someone gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door."
Gideon: What the **** are you talking about?
Eric: You heard me rapping, right?
Gideon: You're trespassing. And you owe me a ****in' new door! [Gideon grabs a gun while Eric glances at the door.]
Eric: I'm looking for something in an engagement ring. Gold.
Gideon: Yeah. You're looking for a coroner, shit-for-brains. [He fires at Eric, who is knocked off balance, but the wound quickly heals.] Oh, shit. Oh, shit on me! Shit on me. SHIT ON ME! [After being knocked over, Gideon grabs a bat to protect himself.]
Eric: [Suddenly hanging from the ceiling] Mr. Gideon. You're not paying attention.

[Looking at a bloody crow outline on the wall]
Detective Torres: What the hell do you call that?
Albrecht: I call it blood, detective. I suppose you'll write it up as... "graffiti."

Albrecht: Police! Don't move - I said don't move!
Eric: I thought the police always said "Freeze."
Albrecht: Well I am the police and I say "don't move" Snow White; you move, you're dead.
Eric: And I say I'm dead; and I move...

T-Bird: I got trouble. One of my crew got himself perished.
Top Dollar: Yeah, and who might that be?
T-Bird: Tin Tin. Somebody stuck his blades in all his major organs in alphabetical order.
Top Dollar: Well Gentlemen, by all means, I think we ought to have an introspective moment of silence for poor old Tin Tin.

Eric: Jesus Christ! Stop me if you've heard this one. Jesus Christ walks into a hotel…
[Funboy shoots him]
Eric: Ow. He hands the innkeeper three nails and he asks…
[Funboy shoots him again]
Funboy: Don't you ever ****ing die?
Eric: “Can you put me up for the night?”

Top Dollar: All the power in the world resides in the eyes, fella. Sometimes they're more useful than the people that bear them.
Gideon: You know, you're directly out of your ****ing mind! You know that!
Top Dollar: Yeah. [Pause] Eyes see. One of the most important things I learned from my sister. [Indicates Myca]
Gideon: Sister? She's supposed to be your sister?
Top Dollar: My father's daughter. That's right. What's the matter, you don't see the resemblance?

T-Bird: What the **** are you supposed to be man
Eric: I'm your passenger [Pause] Drive.

[Two cops are on watch, drinking coffee]
Cop 1: You got that cream stuff? [Cop 2 hands it over.] I hate this. They can't even call it cream legally.
[T-Bird and Eric drive by at 90 MPH]
Cop 2: What in the crap-- [speeds off after T-bird's car]
[Cop 1 screams as the acceleration of the car makes him spill hot coffee all over himself.]

Detective Torres: Who's the cartoon character in the painted face?
Albrecht: Hey, you're the detective. Why don't you tell me?
Detective Torres: Okay. Gideons blows all to hell and you're having a chitchat with some weirdo who winds up in T-Bird's car when it zigs instead of zags. Then you steal one of my case files from homicide, and you're saying this is just a ****ing automobile accident? Come on!
Albrecht: Yeah. Good speech though. I didn't wanna interrupt you. It sounded good. You gotta write that shit down!

Sarah: I knew it was you. Even with the makeup. I remembered your song. You said, “can't rain all the time.” That is from your song, right? [Pause. No answer.] Come on, Eric, I know you're here. I miss you... and Shelly. Get so lonely all by myself. [Pause. Still no answer.] The hell with you. I thought you cared. [She turns to leave and sees Eric's shadow on the wall.]
Eric: Sarah, I do care. [Sarah runs to him and they hug.]

Sarah: When someone's dead, they can't come back, can they?
Albrecht: That's what I thought. Are you referring to anyone in particular?
Sarah: You'll just think I'm nuts.
Albrecht: Yeah, well, then maybe they'll have to lock us both up.
Sarah: You see him too?
Albrecht: I saw somebody. Maybe it was your fairy godfather.
Sarah: [Sadly] Eric didn't come back for me. He can't be my friend any more because, well, I'm alive.
Albrecht: You want a friend to walk you home?
[Sarah nods.]

Top Dollar: Problem is, it's all been done before.
Bad Ass Criminal: That's no reason to quit.
Top Dollar: Wrong. Best reason to quit. Only reason to quit.

Eric: Gentlemen!
Top Dollar: So you're him huh? The avenger. The killer of killers. Like the outfit. Not sure about the face though.
Eric: I just want him.
Top Dollar: Well you can't have him.
Eric: Well, I see you've made your decision… [Eric stands on the table] now let's see you enforce it.
Top Dollar: Aw this is already boring the shit out me, KILL 'IM!
[They all fire. Eric falls backwards off the table.]
Top Dollar: Ooh, that had to hurt.

[Eric throws Skank out the window. He lands on the cop car from the chase scene.]
Cop 2: What in the crap--

Various Police Officers: "Don't move!" "Hold it!" "That's all she wrote!" "Move and we shoot!"
Eric: [raises his hands as if defeated, a tragic expression on his face. He then does a high-stepping grapevine and jumps out the window.]

Myca: He has power, but it is power you can take from him.
Top Dollar: I like him already.
Myca: The crow is his link between the land of the living and the realm of the dead.
Grange: So kill the crow and destroy the man.

Sarah: You're going to say I shouldn't be in the cemetery in the middle of the night, right?
Eric: Safest place in the world to be.
Sarah: That's 'cause everybody's dead. I knew you'd come here.
Eric: It's really late, Sarah.
Sarah: You didn't say goodbye.
Eric: You're just going to have to forgive me for that.

Eric: I can handle it. Don't worry.
Albrecht: I'm not worried. Look, here's the plan. You stay in front, and when they run out of ammo, I'll arrest ‘em.
Eric: That sounds like a great plan. There's just one problem. [He indicates his bleeding shoulder]
Albrecht: Oh, shit. You're bleeding all over the place. I thought, you know, you were invincible.
Eric: [Annoyed] I was. I'm not anymore.
Albrecht: [Sighs] Well, I guess you really will need my help, won't you?

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