[While Col. Mustard and Wadsworth are discussing whether or not there's anybody else in the house] Please! Don't you think we should get that man out of the house before he finds out what's been going on here?

[in an alternate ending] I hated her... so... much, It--it..the f--, it--flame...flames...flames on the side of my face, breathing, breath... heaving, breaths... heaving...

[in an alternate ending] I'm going home to sleep with my wife.

I work for U.N.O., the United Nations Organization. I work for a special branch, the World Health Organization. [U NO WHO]

[After being paired with Mrs. Peacock] It's you and me, honey bunch.

Husbands should be like Kleenex: soft, strong, and disposable.

[About her late husband] It's a matter of life after death. Now that he's dead, I have a life.

Life after death is as improbable as sex after marriage.

He was always a rather stupidly optimistic man. I’m afraid it came as a great shock to him when he died.

Communism was just a red herring.

Why would he want to kill you in public?

Oh, I'm being blackmailed all right, it's just that I did what I'm being blackmailed for.

Well, someone's got to break the ice, and it might as well be me. I mean, I'm used to being a hostess, it's part of my husband's work. And it's always difficult when a group of new friends meet together for the first time, to get acquainted. So I'm perfectly prepared to start the ball rolling. I mean, I, I have absolutely no idea what we're doing here. Or what I'm doing here, or what this place is about, but I am determined to enjoy myself. And I'm very intrigued, and oh my this soup is delicious, isn't it?

Whoever it is better go away or they'll be killed!

Take your hands off me! I'm a senator's wife!