Christmas Story, A

Christmas Story, A quotes

36 total quotes (ID: 694)

Mr. Parker
Mrs. Parker
Multiple Characters
Narrator (Ralphie as an adult)


Randy: I can't get up! Ralphie, I can't get up!!


Now, I had heard that word at least ten times a day from my old man. He worked in profanity the way other artists might work in oils or clay. It was his true medium; a master.

My old man's spare tires were only actually tires in the academic sense. They were round and had once been made of rubber.

Oh, life is like that. Sometimes, at the height of our revelries, when our joy is at it's zenith, when all is most right with the world, the most unthinkable disasters decend upon us.

That son of a bitch would freeze up in the middle of summer on the equator!

In our world, you were either a bully, a toady, or one of the nameless rabble of victims!

Randy: I can't put my arms down!

We plunged into the cornucopia quivering with desire and the ecstasy of unbridled avarice.

Some men are Baptists, others Catholics; my father was an Oldsmobile man.

Was there no end to this conspiracy of irrational prejudice against Red Ryder and his Peacemaker?!?!

SONS O'BITCHES! BUMPUSSES!!!

NADDAFINGA!! (Not a finger!!)

That is... The ugliest lamp I have ever seen in my entire LIFE!

Aha aha, it's a clinkerrrrrrr!!! That blasted, stupid furnace. Dadgummit! [Goes down stairs; falling sound is heard] Damn skates! [Coughs] Who the hell turned it all the way down?! AGAIN?!!!

Let's face it, most of us are scoffers. But moments before zero hour, it did not pay to take chances.