Annie Hall

Annie Hall quotes

85 total quotes (ID: 674)

Alvy Singer
Annie Hall
Multiple Characters

Alvy: Adult education is such junk. The professors are so phony. How can you do it?
Annie: I don't care what you say about David. He's a perfectly fine teacher. And what are you doing following me around for anyway? I think we'd better call this relationship quits.

Annie and I broke up. And I still can't get my mind around that. You know, I keep sifting the pieces of the relationship through my mind, and examining my life and trying to figure out where did the screwup come, you know. A year ago, we were in love, you know.

Why don't you get William F. Buckley to kill the spider?...Are you going with a right-wing rock 'n roll star?

I'm making excellent progress. Pretty soon, when I lie down on his couch, I won't have to wear the lobster bib.

They did not take me in the Army. I was, um, interestingly enough, I was, I was 4-P. Yes. In the, in the event of war, I'm a hostage.

I hope to become the balding virile type, you know, as opposed to, say, the distinguished gray, unless I'm neither of those two. Unless I'm one of those guys with saliva dribbling out of his mouth who wanders into a cafeteria with a shopping bag screaming about socialism.

My Grammy never gave gifts, you know. She was too busy getting raped by Cossacks.

[to Annie] You're a wonderful tennis player...You're the worst driver I've ever seen in my life...and I love what you're wearing.

I was thrown out of N.Y.U. my freshman year for cheating on my metaphysics final, you know. I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me. When I was thrown out, my mother, who was an emotionally high-strung woman, locked herself in the bathroom and took an overdose of Mah-Jongg tiles. I was depressed at that time. I was in analysis. I was suicidal as a matter of fact and would have killed myself, but I was in analysis with a strict Freudian, and, if you kill yourself, they make you pay for the sessions you miss.

Man in theatre line: We saw the Fellini film last Tuesday. It was not one of his best. It lacks a cohesive structure. You know, you get the feeling that he's not absolutely sure what it is he wants to say. 'Course, I've always felt he was essentially a - a technical film maker. Granted, La Strada was a great film. Great in its use of negative imagery more than anything else. But that simple, cohesive core...
Alvy: I'm gonna have a stroke...What I wouldn't give for a large sock full of manure...He's screaming his opinions in my ear.
Man in theatre line: ...Like all that Juliet of the Spirits or Satyricon... I found it incredibly...indulgent. You know, he really is. He's one of the most indulgent filmmakers. He really is...
Alvy: Key word is indulgent.

Yeah, why not? Because we're just going to go home later, right, and there's gonna be all that tension, you know, we never kissed before. And I'll never know when to make the right move or anything. So we'll kiss now and get it over with, and then we'll go eat. OK? We'll digest our food better.

[to Annie] Don't you have a can of Raid in the house? I told you a thousand times. You should always keep a lot of insect spray. You never know who's gonna crawl over.

Darling, I've been killing spiders since I was thirty, OK?

Oh that's OK, we can walk to the curb from here!

What did you do? Grow up in a Norman Rockwell painting? Your Grammy?