Annie Hall quotes

View Quote They did not take me in the Army. I was, um, interestingly enough, I was, I was 4-P. Yes. In the, in the event of war, I'm a hostage.

View Quote Oh that's OK, we can walk to the curb from here!

View Quote I was thrown out of N.Y.U. my freshman year for cheating on my metaphysics final, you know. I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me. When I was thrown out, my mother, who was an emotionally high-strung woman, locked herself in the bathroom and took an overdose of Mah-Jongg tiles. I was depressed at that time. I was in analysis. I was suicidal as a matter of fact and would have killed myself, but I was in analysis with a strict Freudian, and, if you kill yourself, they make you pay for the sessions you miss.

View Quote What did you do? Grow up in a Norman Rockwell painting? Your Grammy?

View Quote I'm making excellent progress. Pretty soon, when I lie down on his couch, I won't have to wear the lobster bib.

View Quote Darling, I've been killing spiders since I was thirty, OK?

View Quote [to Annie] Don't you have a can of Raid in the house? I told you a thousand times. You should always keep a lot of insect spray. You never know who's gonna crawl over.

View Quote What? Are we driving through plutonium?

View Quote Yeah, you're really popular - I can see. What, you got the plague of something?

View Quote You know, I don't think I could take a mellow evening because I - I don't respond well to mellow. You know what I mean? I have a tendency to - if I get too mellow, I - I ripen and then rot, you know.

View Quote The incredible thing about it is, I'm paying for her analysis and she's making progress, and I'm getting screwed...It's absurd. She's making progress and I'm not making any progress. And her progress is killing my progress.

View Quote Annie: [voiceover] That was fun. I don't think California is bad at all. It's a drag coming home.
Alvy: [voiceover] A lot of beautiful women. It was fun to flirt.
Annie: [voiceover] I have to face facts. I adore Alvy, but our relationship doesn't seem to work anymore.
Alvy: [voiceover] I'll have the usual trouble with Annie in bed tonight. Why do I need this?
Annie: [voiceover] If only I had the nerve to break up but it would really hurt him.
Alvy: [voiceover] If only I didn't feel guilty asking Annie to move out. It would probably wreck her. But I should be honest.
Annie: Alvy? Let's face it. You know something? I don't think our relationship is working.
Alvy: I know. A relationship, I think, is-is like a shark. You know, it has to constantly move forward or it dies, and I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.

View Quote She's a 10, Max, and that's great for you because you're - you're used to two's, aren't you?

View Quote I can't get with any religion that advertises in Popular Mechanics.

View Quote I don't use any major hallucinogenics...Five years ago at a party, I tried to take my pants off over my head.