That's quite a lovely rack you're wearing. Perhaps I could find you some fluffy new slippers made from the heads of innocent and defenseless baby seals!

[meeting Quinn's pet raven, Tinky] Pleasure, Tinky. Corvus corax, common raven, smartest of all birds. Rare in these parts.

Attendant: Peanuts?
Ace Ventura: [looks down] Yes, I have one right here. It's bulky, but I consider it carry-on.
Attendant: [holding bag of peanuts] Peanuts.
Ace Ventura: ...Oh, I see!

[Ace is horrified at being inside a room decorated with the heads and bodies of animals]
Quinn: Something wrong, Mr. Ventura?
Ace Ventura: Of course not. This is a lovely room of death. Take care, now. Bye-bye, then.

The Tiny Warrior: [shrieking in Watchootoo]
Ace Ventura: What did he just say?
Fulton Greenwall: I think he said that she is not a virgin. [looks at Ace]
Ace Ventura: ...They can tell that!?

Guano! Hello? Does "poop" ring a bell? [quotes from a book] "Guano: mines as a source of nitrate, producing 84% of the world's supply in fertilizer, a $1.4 billion industy." THAT'S what this war is all about! You can't legally take possession of the caves as long as the Wachatis inhabit the area... and you want that dooky so bad, you can taste it!

[Watchootoo chief speaks in Watchootoo to Ace]
Ouda: Wachootoo Chief say, "You friend to Watchootoo."
[Ace snorts and the Watchootoo chief speaks again]
Ouda: "But if curse of Shikaka not lifted by tomorrow sun at top of sky, Wachootoo kill all Wachati, and smash your head on a rock."
Ace Ventura: ...Super. Take care now, bye-bye then.

Meeting with sinister types much? A-not 'too much', a 'much too much'.

[sees the hideout of the poachers] Gravy!

[with Greenwall at top of the huge stairs leading to a temple]
Ace Ventura: I'll meet you at the bottom. There's still one more thing I must do before I go...
[close-up of slinky going down huge steps to temple]
Ace Ventura: Isn't this incredible?! It's gonna be some kind of a record!! [singing] Everyone loves a Slinky, you gotta get a Slinky, Slinky, Slinky, go Slinky go!
[Slinky stops on the second to last step]
Ace Ventura: Awwwwww, MAN!! Can you believe it?! It was RIGHT there! Can I do it one more time?
Fulton Greenwall: Forgive me, Mr Ventura, but if we don't hurry now, we might miss the plane.
Ace Ventura: Of course. How selfish of me. Let's do all the things that YOU wanna do.

Don't mind me, Mr Quinn. I'm just a curious little rhino!

Hey, what are ya, HR Shove-N-Stuff?

[catchphrase] All-righty, then.

[after parking] Lll-ii-k'a'gll-ove!

Do I have something in my teeth?