Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory

Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory quotes

76 total quotes (ID: 711)

Multiple Characters
Oompa Loompas
Sam Beauregarde
Veruca Salt
Willy Wonka

Mr. Turkentine: Charlie Bucket, how many did you open?
Charlie Bucket: Two.
Mr. Turkentine: That's easy. Two hundred is twice one hundred--
Charlie Bucket: Not two-hundred, just two.
Mr. Turkentine: TWO?! What do you mean you only opened two?!
Charlie Bucket: I don't care very much for chocolate.
Mr. Turkentine: WELL I CAN'T FIGURE OUT JUST TWO!! So let's pretend you opened TWO HUNDRED! Now, if you opened two hundred Wonka bars, apart from getting dreadfully sick, you would have used up twenty percent of one thousand, which is fifteen percent half over again, ten percent...

Willy Wonka: The strawberries taste like strawberries. The snozzberries taste like snozzberries!
Veruca Salt: Snozzberries? Who ever heard of a snozzberry?
[Wonka grabs Veruca's jaw]
Willy Wonka: We are the music makers... and we are the dreamers of dreams.

Mr. Salt: What is this Wonka, some kind of fun house?
Willy Wonka: Why? Having fun?

Charlie Bucket: What was that we just went through?
Willy Wonka: Hsawaknow.
Mrs. Teevee: Is that Japanese?
Willy Wonka: No, that's Wonkawash spelled backwards.

Interviewer: So you like the killing [on television]
Mike Teevee: That's what life's all about! But my dad won't let me have a real gun yet, will you, pop?
Mr. Teevee: Not 'till you're twelve, son.

Charlie Bucket: Mr. Wonka, what's gonna happen to the other kids? Augustus, Veruca?
Willy Wonka: My dear boy, I promise you they'll be quite all right. When they leave here, they'll be completely restored to their normal, terrible old selves. But maybe they'll be a little bit wiser for the wear. Anyway, don't worry about them.
Grandpa Joe: Er...what do we do now, Mr. Wonka?
Willy Wonka: Yes, well...I hope you've enjoyed yourselves, excuse me for not showing you out, you'll find the way, I'm terribly busy. Whole day wasted. Good-bye to you both, Goodbye. [quickly disappears into his office]
Charlie: What happened? Did we do something wrong?
Grandpa Joe: I don't know, Charlie... but I'm gonna find out.

Grandpa Joe: Mr. Wonka?
Willy Wonka: I am extraordinarily busy, sir.
Grandpa Joe: I just wanted to ask about the chocolate, the lifetime supply of chocolate, for Charlie. When does he get it?
Willy Wonka: He doesn't.
Grandpa Joe: Why not?
Willy Wonka: Because he broke the rules.
Grandpa Joe: What rules? We didn't see any rules! Did we, Charlie?
Willy Wonka: Wrong, sir! WRONG! Under section 37B of the contract signed by him, it states quite clearly that all offers shall become null and void IF - and you can read it for yourself in this photostatic copy! - "I, the undersigned, shall forfeit all rights, privileges, and licenses herein and herein contained," et cetera, et cetera..."Fax mentis incendium gloria cultum,"[the torch of the mind lights the path to glory] et cetera, et cetera..."MEMO BIS PUNITOR DELICATUM"!! [I remember the spoiled punisher twice] It's ALL there! Black and white, clear as crystal! You STOLE Fizzy-Lifting Drinks! You BUMPED into the ceiling, which now has to be washed and sterilized, so you get... NOTHING!!! YOU LOSE!! GOOD DAY, SIR!!!
Grandpa Joe: You're a crook. You're a cheat and a swindler! That's what you are! How can you do a thing like this?! Build up a little boy's hopes, and then smash all his dreams to pieces?! (furiously) YOU'RE AN INHUMAN MONSTER!!
Willy Wonka: I SAID "GOOD DAY!!!"
(he goes on about his work)

Grandpa Joe: Come on, Charlie, let's get out of here. I'll get even with him if it's the last thing I ever do. If Slugworth wants a Gobstopper, he'll get one.

A small step for mankind, but a giant leap for us. [Misinterpretation of Neil Armstrong's famous quote upon being the first man to walk on the moon.]

Where is fancy bred? In the heart or in the head? [From The Merchant of Venice.]

[as the Wonkamobile sprays foam everywhere] "Martha! Martha! Du entschwandest, Und mein Glück nahmst du mit dir; Gib mir wieder, was du fandest, Oder teile es mit mir." [From Friedrich von Flotow's opera Martha. Translation: "Martha! Martha! You have vanished, and you take my joy with you; Show me what you have found, or split it with me."]

Is it my soul that calls upon my name? [A quote from Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare.]

[Referring to the soda-powered Wonkamobile] A thing of beauty is a joy forever. [Quoting John Keats.]

All I ask is a tall ship and a star to sail her by. [From "Sea Fever" by John Masefield.]

[softly singing, then shouting, on the famous boat ride] There's no earthly way of knowing which direction we are going. There's no knowing where we're rowing, or which way the river's flowing. Is it raining? is it snowing? is a hurricane a-blowing? Not a speck of light is showing, so the danger must be growing, AND THEY'RE CERTAINLY NOT SHOWING ANY SIGNS THAT THEY ARE SLOWING!!!