Simon Birch quotes

36 total quotes

Adult Joe Wenteworth (Narrator)

View Quote [Joe and Simon arrive at their grandmother's home for dinner.]
Grandmother Wenteworth: That child is positively unnatural.
Hilde: Most peculiar.
Grandmother Wenteworth: And his voice, like--
Hilde: A mouse.
Grandmother Wenteworth: More than one. Like mice.
Hilde: Strangled mice.
Grandmother Wenteworth: [laughing] Strangled mice. Very good, Hilde.

View Quote [At the birth scene of Simon Birch.] Simon Birch was the smallest delivery ever recorded in the history of Gravestown Memorial Hospital.

View Quote [At the nativity play]
Bully: IM GONNAH KICK YOUR ASS, YOU LITTLE PERVE!
Joe Wentworth:[in pain after being hit in the ball from Marjorie] Hey pick on someone your own size! [Pointing at bully]
Bully: OKAY! [And punches Joe Wentworth!!]

View Quote [At the nativity play]
Marjorie: Simon, are you okay? Simon, what is it?
Simon Birch: Boobs! [Reaches out to grab Marjorie]

View Quote [At nativity play]
Marjorie: Get off me! [saying to Joe Wentworth]
Joe Wentworth: Im trying to help!
Marjorie:[kicks Joe in the balls]

View Quote [At the nativity play]
Random Kid:YOU GO SIMON!
Joe Wentworth: HOLY SHIT!