Raising Arizona quotes

26 total quotes

H.I. McDunnough
Multiple Characters
Nathan Arizona Sr.

View Quote Moses: An' when they was no meat we ate fowl. An'when they was no fowl we ate crawdad. An' when they was no crawdad to be foun', we ate San'.
HI: You ate what?
MOSES: (nodding): We ate San'.
HI: You ate sand?!
MOSES: Dass right . . .

View Quote FBI Investigator: Is it true your name was originally 'Nathan Huffines'?
Nathan: Yeah, what of it?
FBI Investigator: Why did you change it?
Nathan: Would you buy furniture from a place called 'Unpainted Huffines'?

View Quote I said, "Healthy white baby? Five years? What else you got?" Said they got two Koreans and a negra born with his heart on the outside. It's a crazy world.

View Quote And the doc went on to explain that this woman, who looked as fertile as the Tennessee Valley, could bear no young. Her insides were a rocky place where my seed could find no purchase.

View Quote Doctor: Why do you say you feel "trapped" in a man's body.
Convict: Well, sometimes I get them menstrual cramps real hard.

View Quote And if a frog had wings he wouldn't bump his ass a-hoppin'.

View Quote I don't know what his damn jammies looked like... they had Yodas and shit on them.

View Quote Teller: Now, what's it gonna be young feller? You want I should freeze or get down on the ground? 'Cause if'n I freeze, I can't rightly drop. And if'n I drop, I'm gonna be in motion.

View Quote Dot: That there's for his orthodonture and his college. You soak his thumb in iodine and you might get by without the orthodonture, but it won't knock a thing off the college.

View Quote Old man in pickup truck: Son, you got a panty on your head.

View Quote I tried to stand up and fly straight, but it wasn't easy with that sumbitch Reagan in the White House. I dunno. They say he's a decent man, so maybe his advisors are confused.

View Quote H.I., you're young and you got your health, what you want with a job?

View Quote H.I. McDunnough: (to the cashier) I'll be taking these Huggies and whatever cash ya got.
Edwina 'Ed' McDunnough: That sum'bitch. That son of a bitch! You son of a bitch!
H.I. McDunnough: And make it quick, I'm in dutch with the wife.

View Quote (to Smalls) GIVE ME THAT BABY YOU WARTHOG FROM HELL!

View Quote Dot: Reilly, You take that diaper off your head and put it back on your sister.