Night Shift quotes

16 total quotes

Bill Blazejowski
Others

View Quote What if you mix the mayonnaise in the can, WITH the tunafish? Or... hold it! Chuck! I got it! Take LIVE tuna fish, and FEED 'em mayonnaise! Oh this is great. [speaks into tape recorder] Call Starkist!

View Quote Wanna know why I carry this tape recorder? To tape things. See, I'm an idea man, Chuck. I got ideas coming at me all day... I couldn't even fight 'em off if I wanted. Wait a second... hold the phone! Hold the phone! [speaking into tape recorder] Idea to eliminate garbage. Edible paper. You eat it, it's gone! You eat it, it's outta there! No more garbage!

View Quote Chuck: I used to be an investment counselor.
Bill: Yeah? [pause] What's that?
Chuck: It's like a stockbroker.
Bill: So what're you doing babysitting stiffs? What were you... drinker? Big drinker?
Chuck: No!
Bill: Doper! Toothead! Nose candy! Coke!

View Quote Leonard: Oh, that Barney Rubble. What an actor.

View Quote We're all adults here - we can talk about this openly... [writing on chalkboard] PROSTITUTION! But what does that mean really? Sometimes it helps to understand a word if you break it down, so let's do that now shall we? Pros... it doesn't mean anything, you can forget about that... Tit, I think we all know what that means, Tu, two tit and TION of course, from the Latin to shun... to say uh-uh no thank you anyway I don't want it, to push away... it doesn't even belong in this word really.

View Quote Bill: You tellin' me to shut up?
Chuck: I'm telling you to shut up! I will tell your recorder so that you don't forget!
[Chuck picks up tape recorder and turns it on]
Chuck: Hello, this is Chuck to remind Bill to SHUT UP!

View Quote Chuck: As we sit here and idly chat, there are woman, female human beings, rolling around in strange beds with strange men, and we are making money from that.
Bill: Is this a great country, or what?

View Quote Belinda: Bill, Bill, are you all right? Did you break anything, Bill?
Bill: I caught an updraft.
Chuck: Are you ok?
Bill: Yeah, I'm all right, don't worry, I'm all right, fortunately the ground broke my fall.

View Quote So there I was at the Blackjack table with all my wash 'n' dries... did I tell you I had they idea for them first?

View Quote LOVE BROKERS!

View Quote Chuck Lumley: [reads the forms that Lenoard, the day shift guy left] Name of the disceased... something Polish?

View Quote I wash my hands and my feet of you!

View Quote Bill: [Chuck is spitting on himself in the jail cell] Chuck, come on - it looks bad in front of the other guys!
Chuck: So what am I running for, cell president?
Bill: No!... they have that?

View Quote Bill: [picking up photo from desk] Hey Chuck? Who is this? Your wife?
Chuck: Fianc?e.
Bill: Nice frame!

View Quote Chuck: [elevator door opens; Chuck sees Belinda lying on the elevator floor] Oh my God. Did you fall down? Did somebody hit you?
Belinda: Other way round. Somebody hit me and then I fell down.