Rick: Ok, you're here, the bad guys are here, Evy's been kidnapped. Let me guess...
Ardeth Bay: Yes, they once again removed the creature from his grave.
Jonathan: I don't mean to point fingers, but isn't your job to make sure that doesn't happen?

Rick: This is bad Evy.
Evy: We've had bad before.
Rick: This is worse.

Rick: You know, it's not easy, being a dad.
Alex: Yeah. But you do it real good.

[Jonathan and an enemy soldier run into a clearing with stones while fleeing the forrest gremlins]
Jonathan: We're safe, we're safe! See those sacred stones, they can't cross those.
Enemy Soldier: Are you sure?
Jonathan: Of course I am sure!
[A forest gremlin notices them and attacks, spearing the solder in the chest]
Jonathan: [Screams then looks at the solder, shocked] Sorry, my mistake!

[Rick, Evy and the others are being pursued by the mummified soldiers]
Ardeth Bay: Glad to see me now?
Rick: Just like old times, huh?

[on seeing Rick's tattoo]
Ardeth Bay: If I were to say to you that, "I am a stranger traveling from the East, seeking that which is lost"...
Rick: ... Then I would reply that, "I am a stranger traveling from the West, it is I whom you seek." How did you...?
Ardeth Bay: Then it is true. You have the sacred mark.
Rick: What, that? No, that got slapped on me when I was in an orphanage in Cairo.
Ardeth Bay: That mark means you are a protector of man. A warrior for God. A Medjai.
Rick: I'm sorry. You've got the wrong guy.

(after seeing a hieroglyph of a warrior bearing his tattoo and the staff) Ok, NOW I'm a believer!

[about the mummified soldiers] Oh no, not these guys again!

[Jonathan pulls up in a double decker bus] Rick: [Confused] What's the matter with my car?
Jonathan: I was forced to find an alternative means of transportation.
Rick: A DOUBLE-DECKER BUS!?
Jonathan: Well...[points at Alex] It was his idea.
Alex: Was not!
Jonathan: Was to!
Alex: Was NOT!
Rick: Just go!
[Bus pulls away. Mummies give chase, climbing over Rick's car and destroying it in the process] Rick: No, no, not my car! [menacingly] Oh I hate mummies!

[on seeing Rick] YOU!

[to Alex] I hope your parents had a good ride.

Get a room!

Go to hell and take your friends with you!

I say chaps, look at that. Shrunken heads. I'd love to know how they do that. [Everybody looks strangely at Jonathan] Just curious.

If a man does not embrace his past, he has no future.