Peeper: I think Victoria just told me her Secret.
Blind deacon: [after sensing Nicky's presence] You make the Lord very nervous.
Cardinal: In today's gospel, the Lord tells us how we should live if we wish to obtain the splendor of heaven...or something like that. Jesus this, Moses that, Abraham hit me with a wiffle ball bat.
Basketball audience member: Now that was some straight up David Copperfield shit!
Townie: You can do it, Nicky! Kick him in his hairy balls!
Todd: [after hearing Mr. Beefy singing in his sleep] That is the most horrifying thing I have ever seen.
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