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Fletch Lives

Fletch Lives quotes

45 total quotes

Fletch Lives




View Quote "I was on my gazebo, on the roof, making some repairs, and I was struck by lightning...and I've had migraine headaches and blurred vision ever since then but praise the Lord that was my lucky day because ever since then, I've had the healing power. Amen, God bless you. Thank you very much. Good night. Yes? What happened? Yes?
View Quote (narrating) All I needed now was a computer. And a ten year old kid to teach me how to use it.
View Quote Becky was a good girl and didn't need to be spanked... dammit.
View Quote It takes a big man to admit when he's wrong. I am NOT a big man.
View Quote (narrating) The Reverend Farnsworth was Becky's father, but I wasn't going to hold that against her. If I was going to hold anything against her, it wouldn't be her father.
View Quote (narrating) Figuring out that the guy who dropped my watch in the swamp was the same guy who stole it at the morgue didn't take Sherlock Holmes... Larry Holmes could've figured that one out.
View Quote I borrowed your toothbrush. I would have used your razor but it looks like you've been doing some gardening with it.
View Quote What can I do to y- for you?
View Quote I believe Louisana is the Pelican State.
View Quote They multiply by masturbation.
View Quote I've been foolishly squandering my salary on food and heat.
View Quote S****! S****! S****! Go back to where you're from!
View Quote These walls are deplaning at an alarming rate!
View Quote You shouldn't wear so much eye shadow. It makes you look slutty.
View Quote (narrating) The morgue proved to be a dead end. But I guess it is for most people.