Fight Club quotes

View Quote Ok. You are now firing a gun at your imaginary friend near 400 gallons of nitroglycerin!

View Quote [Last words] What's that smell?

View Quote Ah. Flashback humor.

View Quote Just ask, man.

View Quote Is it a problem for you to ask?

View Quote [From theatrical PSA] Did you know that urine is sterile? You can drink it.

View Quote Candystripe a cancer ward, it's not my problem.

View Quote I can hardly believe anything about last night.

View Quote Pre Movie Warning: "If you are reading this, then this warning is for you. Every word you read of this useless fine print is another second off your life. Don't you have other things to do? Is your life so empty that you honestly can't think of a better way to spend these moments? Or are you so impressed with authority that you give respect and credence to all who claim it? Do you read everything you're supposed to read? Do you think everything you're supposed to think? Buy what you're told you should want? Get out of your apartment. Meet a member of the opposite sex. Stop the excessive shopping and masturbation. Quit your job. Start a fight. Prove you're alive. If you don't claim your humanity, you will become a statistic. You have been warned ... Tyler." Taken from split-second "pop-up" warning that appears at the beginning of the DVD

View Quote Chloe: Well, I'm still here, but I don't know for how long. That's as much certainty as anyone can give me. But I've got some good news: I no longer have any fear of death. But I am in a pretty lonely place. No one will have sex with me. I'm so close to the end, and all I want is to get laid for the last time. I have pornographic movies in my apartment, and lubricants and amyl nitrate ...

View Quote Richard Chesler: Is that your blood?
Narrator: Some of it, yeah.

View Quote Narrator: Well, what do you want me to do? You just want me to hit you?
Tyler Durden: C'mon, do me this one favor.
Narrator: Why?
Tyler Durden: Why? I don't know why; I don't know. Never been in a fight. You?
Narrator: No, but that's a good thing.
Tyler Durden: No, it is not. How much can you know about yourself if you've never been in a fight? I don't wanna die without any scars. So come on – hit me, before I lose my nerve.
Narrator: This is crazy.
Tyler Durden: So go crazy. Let 'er rip.
Narrator: I don't know about this.
Tyler Durden: I don't either. Who gives a shit? No one's watching. What do you care?
Narrator: Whoa, wait, this is crazy. You want me to hit you?
Tyler Durden: That's right.
Narrator: What, like in the face?
Tyler Durden: Surprise me.
Narrator: This is so ****ing stupid ...
[He swings and connects with Tyler's head]
Tyler Durden: Mother****er! You hit me in the ear!
Narrator: Well, Jesus, I'm sorry.
Tyler Durden: Ow, Christ ... why the ear, man?
Narrator: Guess I ****ed it up ...
Tyler Durden: No, that was perfect!
[He punches the Narrator in the stomach]

View Quote [One of the Narrator's teeth falls out]
Narrator: ****.
Tyler Durden: Hey, even the Mona Lisa's falling apart.

View Quote Narrator: When people think you're dying, they really, really listen to you, instead of just ...
Marla Singer: ... waiting for their turn to speak?

View Quote Richard Chesler (reading a piece of paper): The first rule of Fight Club is you don't talk about Fight Club?
Narrator (voice-over): I'm half asleep again. I must've left the original in the copy machine.
Richard Chesler: The second rule of Fight Club ... is this yours?
Narrator: Huh?
Richard Chesler: Pretend you're me, make a managerial decision: you find this, what would you do?
Narrator (pauses): Well, I gotta tell you: I'd be very, very careful who you talk to about that, because the person who wrote that ... is dangerous.
[Gets up from the chair]
Narrator (talking slowly): And this button-down, Oxford-cloth psycho might just snap, and then stalk from office to office with an Armalite AR-10 carbine gas-powered semi-automatic weapon, pumping round after round into colleagues and co-workers. This might be someone you've known for years. Someone very, very close to you.
Narrator (voice-over): Tyler's words coming out of my mouth.
[He snatches the piece of paper from Richard's hands]
Narrator (voice-over): And I used to be such a nice guy.
Narrator: Or maybe you shouldn't bring me every little piece of trash you happen to pick up.
[Phone rings]
Narrator (into phone): Compliance and Liability ...?
Marla Singer: My tit's gonna rot off.
Narrator (to Richard Chesler): Would you excuse me? I need to take this.