Don't Be A Menace To South Central While Drinking Your Juice In The Hood quotes

View Quote Ashtray's cellmate: If you hit a man, in time his wounds will heal. If you steal from a man, you can replace what you've stolen. But always cross in the green, never in between. Because the honorable Elijah Muhammed Ali floats like a butterfly and stings like a bee. And always remember my brother, one fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish, knick knack, paddy whack, give a dog a bone, two thousand, zero, zero, party, oops! Out of time, my bacon smellin' fine.

View Quote Preacher: And that's what God expects from His sheep, here at the Greater Ebenezer New Revival Tree of Life Institutional Double Rock on the Side of the Road to Jericho Missionary Baptist Church of Zion! And I said Mount Cavalry! Huh! Y'all gonna help me!

View Quote Ashtray: We didn't even do nothing.
Officer Self Hatred: What? You think you tough?
[pulls gun on Ashtray]
Officer Self Hatred: You ain't so tough now, little ***ga. I hate your black bas****, you *stink*! I hate your black skin. I hate your black pants. I hate black pepper. I hate black keys on a piano. I hate my gums, because they're black. I hate Whoopi Goldberg's *lips*. I hate the back of Forrest Whittaker's neck. Huh? Most of all, I hate that black-ass Wesley Snipes.

View Quote Loc Dog: I told her I don't want to be on welfare my whole life, you know what i'm sayin'. Hey for real n***a I got bigger and better plans, you know what i'm sayin'. Figured I'd get me a job at the post office, you know, maybe at a bank. You know what I'm saying."
Ashtray: "That's all good, man."
Loc Dog: "Work real hard. Work my way up to manager."
Ashtray: "We need more black people like this."
Loc Dog: "You know what I'm saying? Learn the system a little bit. Then I'll rob that [pulls out a pistol an ****s it] mother****er blind. Break all yallselves.

View Quote My name is Dashiki. That's Swahili for "doggy-style."

View Quote [while filling out job application] Name: Loc Dog, baby. Height: Six-deuce! Age: 19. Father's name: mmm... I dunno. Sex: hell yeah, ****! Salary desired: 3 million dollars! Cash!

View Quote Ashtray: Oooh, girl, you so tight!
Dashiki: Wrong hole, fool!

View Quote [Loc Dog shoots a hole though his bedroom door as Ashtray approaches] Trey, is that you? Hey **** you better start announcing yourself before you get smoked up in here, ****. Damn. You know that chronic make me paranoid, baby. Come here you old fool dog mark ass trick, give me some love.

View Quote Loc Dog: How much for this candy bar?
Korean Woman: Das five dala!
Loc Dog: Five dollars? Damn! I better get some sucky-sucky with that!

View Quote Loc Dog: Either they don't know, don't show, or don't care about being a menace to South Central while drinking your juice in the hood. That's what it's all about. That's what it's all about.
Mailman: The **** is he talking 'bout?

View Quote Ashtray: Hey, Preach, what up n***a?
Preach: Y'all need to stop using the word n***a. You see, it's terms like the word n***athat the white man uses to take away the self esteem of another race.
Ashtray: Word.
Preach: Oh yeah, remind me to pick my laundry up from that c***k mother****er up the street.

View Quote "The Dog" don't bite... unless ya ask.

View Quote Preach: I'm just tryin' to do to white girls what the white man's been doin' to us for 400 years.
Crazy Legs: Yeah, what's that?
Preach: **** 'em.

View Quote Dashiki: Now kids, what do we say to a man that Mommy just met?
Kids: Are you my daddy?

View Quote [during job interview] Recruiter: Well, I see your hobbies include "drinkin', smokin' weed, and all kinds of ill shit."