The Devil's Advocate quotes

View Quote John Milton: You were right about one thing. I have been watching. Couldn't help myself. Watching, waiting, holding my breath. But I'm no puppeteer Kevin, I don't make things happen. Doesn't work like that.
Kevin Lomax: What did you do to Mary Anne?
John Milton: Free will, It's like butterfly wings. One touch and it never gets off the ground. I only set the stage. You pull your own strings
Kevin Lomax: What did you do to Mary Anne?
John Milton: A gun? In here?
Kevin Lomax: Goddammit what did you do to my wife!
John Milton: Well, on a scale of one to ten -ten being the most depraved act of sexual theatre known to man, one being your average Friday night run-through at the Lomaxes' household.... I'd say, not to be immodest, Mary Ann and I got it on at about.... seven.
Kevin Lomax: **** you! (shoots his gun at him)
John Milton: Whoa! Got me! Damn! Yeah! .... Come on! Step on up son! Come on that's good! Yea, you got to hold on to that anger, you got to hold on to that fury. That's the last thing to go, that's the final hiding place, it's the final fig leaf.
Kevin Lomax: Who are you?
John Milton: Who am I? Who are you? Never lost a case. Why? Cause you're so ****in' good. Yeah? But why?
Kevin Lomax: Cause you're my father.
John Milton: I'm a little more than that, Kevin. Awfully hot in that courtroom wasn't it? What's the game plan Kevin? It was a nice run, Kevin. Had to close out some day. Nobody wins them all.
Kevin Lomax: What are you?
John Milton: Aww, I have so many names
Kevin Lomax: Satan?
John Milton: .... Call me Dad.
Kevin Lomax: Mary Anne, she knew it. She knew it so you destroyed her.
John Milton: You blaming me for Mary Anne? Oh I hope you're kidding. Come on, Mary Anne in New York? You could have saved her anytime you wanted. All she wanted was love. Hey, you were too ****ing busy. Face it, you started lookin' for a better deal than her the minute you got here.
Kevin Lomax: You don't know that, you don't know what we had.
John Milton: Hey, I'm on your side
Kevin Lomax: You're a liar!
John Milton: Wait Kevin, there's nothing out there for ya. Don't be such a ****ing chump; stop deluding yourself. I told you to take care of your wife. I told you the world would understand. What did you do? [imitates Kevin's voice] "Ya know what scares me John, I leave the case, she gets better, and then I hate her for it." Remember?
Kevin Lomax: It was a test! Your test!
John Milton: Who told you to pull out all the stops on Mr. Gettys?
Kevin Lomax: You set me up!
John Milton: And Moyez, the direction you took. Popes, Swamis, Snake Handlers all feeding from the same trough. Whose ideas were those?
Kevin Lomax: It's entrapment- you set me up!
John Milton: And Cullen! Knowing he was guilty! Seeing those pictures! What did you do? You put that lying bitch on the stand (laughs)
Kevin Lomax: You PLAYED me!
John Milton: What did I say to you? WHAT WERE MY WORDS TO YOU? Maybe it was your time to lose. You didn't think so.
Kevin Lomax: Lose? I don't lose! I win! I win! I'm a lawyer, that's my job, that's what I do!
John Milton: I rest my case. Vanity is definitely my favorite sin. Self-love, it's so basic. It's look like you didn't care for Mary Ann, Kevin. You're involved with someone else: Yourself.
Kevin Lomax: You're right. I did it all. I let her go.
John Milton: Don't be too hard on yourself, Kevin. You wanted something more.
Kevin Lomax: I let her go and I'm just going to keep moving.
John Milton: You cannot keep on punishing yourself, Kevin. It's awesome how far you've come. I didn't make it easy. Not for you.... [Christabella Andreoli appears] or your sister. Half-sister, to be exact.

View Quote John Milton: [Chanting in Latin] Diaboli virtus in lumbas est. Diaboli virtus in lumbas est. [continues the chant in English] The virtue of the devil is in his loins.

View Quote Behold I send you out as sheep amidst the wolves.

View Quote Alice Lomax: Let me tell you about New York.
Kevin Lomax: Let me guess.
Alice Lomax: Fallen, fallen, is Babylon the great. It has become a dwelling place of demons." Revelation 18. Wouldn't hurt you to look it over.
Kevin Lomax: Couldn't forget it if I tried.
Alice Lomax: Oh, really? And what happened to Babylon?

View Quote I nursed him through two divorces, a cocaine rehab, and a pregnant receptionist. God's creature, right? God's special creature. I've warned him, Kevin. I've warned him every step of the way. Watching him bounce around like a ****ing game. Like a wind-up toy. Like pounds of self-serving greed on wheels. The next thousand years is right around the corner. Eddie Barzoon... take a good look because he's the poster child for the next millennium. These people, it's no mystery where they come from. You sharpen the human appetite to the point where it can split atoms with its desire. You build egos the size of cathedrals. Fiber-optically connect the world to every eager impulse. Grease even the dullest dreams with these dollar-green gold-plated fantasies until every human becomes an aspiring emperor, becomes his own god. Where can you go from there? As we're scrambling from one deal to the next, who's got his eye on the planet? As the air thickens, the water sours, even bees honey takes on the metallic taste of radioactivity... and it just keeps coming, faster and faster. There's no chance to think, to prepare; it's buy futures, sell futures.. when there is no future. We got a runaway train, boy. We got a billion Eddie Barzoons all jogging into the future. Every one of them is getting ready to fist**** God's ex-planet, lick their fingers clean, as they reach out toward their pristine, cybernetic keyboards to tote up their ****ing billable hours. And then it hits home. You got to pay your own way, Eddie. It's a little late in the game to buy out now. Your belly's too full, your dick is sore your eyes are bloodshot and you're screaming for someone to help. But guess what, there's no one there! You're all alone, Eddie, 'CAUSE YOU'RE GOD'S SPECIAL LITTLE CREATURE. (Calming down). Maybe it's true. Maybe God threw the dice once too often. Maybe He let us all down.

View Quote Let me give you a little inside information about God. God likes to watch. He's a prankster. Think about it. He gives man instincts. He gives you this extraordinary gift, and then what does He do, I swear for His own amusement, his own private, cosmic gag reel, He sets the rules in opposition. It's the goof of all time. Look but don't touch. Touch, but don't taste. Taste, don't swallow. Ahaha. And while you're jumpin' from one foot to the next, what is he doing? He's laughin' His sick, ****in' ass off. He's a tight-ass. He's a sadist. He's an absentee landlord. Worship that? Never.

View Quote I'm the hand up Mona Lisa's skirt. I'm a surprise, Kevin. They don't see me coming: that's what you're missing.

View Quote Kevin Lomax: "Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven", is that it?
John Milton: Why not? I'm here on the ground with my nose in it since the whole thing began. I've nurtured every sensation man's been inspired to have. I cared about what he wanted and I never judged him. Why? Because I never rejected him, in spite of all his imperfections. I'm a fan of man. I'm a humanist. Maybe the last humanist.

View Quote Kevin Lomax: Why the law? Cut the shit, Dad! Why the lawyers? Why the law?
John Milton: Because the law, my boy, puts us into everything. It's the ultimate backstage pass. It's the new priesthood, baby. Did you know there are more students in law school than lawyers walking the Earth?

View Quote John Milton: It's your wife, man. She's sick, she needs you; she's got to come first. Ah, wait a minute, wait a minute. You mean the possibility of leaving this case has never even entered you mind?
Kevin Lomax: You know what scares me? I quit the case, she gets better.... and I hate her for it. I don't want to resent her, John, I've got a winner here. I've got to nail this ****er down, do it fast, and put it behind me. Just get it done. Then- Then- put all my energy into her.
John Milton: I stand corrected.

View Quote Kevin Lomax: What about love?
John Milton: Overrated. Biochemically no different than eating large quantities of chocolate.

View Quote [In Milton's Penthouse...]
Kevin Lomax: [quietly] Is there more to it?
Eddie Barzoon: Just this room.
Kevin Lomax: And a bedroom?
Eddie Barzoon: No bedroom.
Kevin Lomax: Where does he sleep?
Eddie Barzoon: Who said he sleeps?
Kevin Lomax: Where does he ****?
John Milton: [coming up to them] Everywhere.

View Quote Don't get too ****y my boy. No matter how good you are don't ever let them see you coming. That's the gaffe my friend. You gotta keep yourself small. Innocuous. Be the little guy. You know, the nerd... the leper... shit-kickin' serf. Look at me. [He stops and pauses.] Underestimated from day one. You'd never think I was a master of the universe, now would ya?

View Quote A woman's shoulders are the front lines of her mystique, and her neck, if she's alive, has all the mystery of a border town. A no-man's land in that battle between the mind and the body.

View Quote Kevin Lomax: Lose? I don't lose! I win! I'm a lawyer, that's my job, that's what I do!
John Milton: I rest my case.