Sheldon Mopes/Smoochy quotes

When my brothers and I played cowboys and Indians, I was always the Chinese railroad worker.

[singing] He slams the door, He stomps his feet, He sends me to bed with zilch to eat. But my step-dad's not mean, he's just adjusting.

Captain Kangaroo, like Jesus Christ, was someone you could really believe in. With those guys, it wasn't about the bells and whistles and the rickety-rackety; it was all about the work. Especially Jesus.

Now I'm not pointing any fingers, Lord knows you start pointing fingers and someone's gonna get poked. And I want you both to know that its not my intention to try and...poke either of you.

You can't change the world but you can make a dent.

Someone toss me a beach towel because my head is swimming.

Don't talk to me like that. I am not your puppet.

Let's face it. Big junkies come from little junkies. We gotta nip this in the bud, Burke!

There are a lot of kids and a lot of junkies out there who are counting on me.

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