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Radio Announcer: It's a sunny, woodsy day in Lumberton, so get those chain saws out. This is the mighty W-O-O-D. At the sound of the falling tree, it's 9:30. There's a whole lot of wood out there, so let's get goin'.

Radio Announcer: Logs, logs, logs. Lumberton, USA. At the sound of the falling tree, it's 1:30, and this is the mighty voice of Lumberton, the town where people really know how much wood a woodchuck chucks.

Detective Williams: That's a human ear all right.

Sandy Williams: [to Jeffrey] Are you the one that found the ear?

Jeffrey Beaumont: Frank... is a very sick and dangerous man.

Detective Williams: Well now Jeffrey, you found something which is very interesting to us. Very interesting. I know you must be curious to know more. But I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you now not only not to tell anyone about your find but also not to ask more about the case. One day, when it's all sewed up, I'll let you know all the details. Right now, though, I can't.
Jeffrey: I understand. I'm just real curious like you said.
Detective Williams: I was the same way myself when I was your age. I guess that's what got me into this business.
Jeffrey: It must be great.
Detective Williams: It's horrible too.

Sandy: There are a couple of cases I get mixed up on...but one thing that keeps coming up is this woman singer. She lives in an apartment building that is real close to your house. It's also close to the field where you found the ear.
Jeffrey: It's a strange world, isn't it?
Sandy: Yeah.

Jeffrey: Man, I like Heineken! You like Heineken?
Sandy: Uh- Well, I've never really had a Heineken before.
Jeffrey: You never had a Heineken before?
Sandy: My dad drinks Bud.
Jeffrey: King of beers.

Jeffrey: I used to know a kid who lived there...he had the biggest tongue in the world. [They laugh together]
Sandy: What happened to him?
Jeffrey: I don't know. He moved away. All my old friends are gone.

Jeffrey: There are opportunities in life for gaining knowledge and experience. Sometimes, it's necessary to take a risk. I got to thinking. I'll bet someone could learn alot by getting into that woman's apartment. You know, sneak in, hide, and observe.
Sandy: Sneak into her apartment?
Jeffrey: Yeah.
Sandy: Are you crazy? Jeffrey, she's possibly involved in murder. This is givin' me the creeps.

Sandy: I don't know. I mean, it sounds like a good daydream, but actually doing it is too weird. It's too dangerous.
Jeffrey: Sandy, let's just try the first part. No one will suspect us. Because no one would think two people like us would be crazy enough to do something like this.
Sandy: You have a point there.

Sandy: I don't know if you're a detective or a pervert.
Jeffrey: Well, that's for me to know and you to find out.

Dorothy: Get out of there. Get out! Put your hands up on your head. Do it! Get on your knees. Do it! What are you doing? Who are you? What's your name?
Jeffrey: Jeffrey
Dorothy: Jeffrey what?
Jeffrey: Jeffrey nothing.
Dorothy: Do you sneak into girls' apartments to see them get undressed?
Jeffrey: Never before this.

Dorothy: Hello baby.
Frank: Shut up. It's Daddy you shit-head. Where's my bourbon? Can't you ****in' remember anything? Now it's dark. Spread your legs. Wider. Show it to me. Don't you ****in' look at me!

Frank: Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy.
Dorothy: Mommy loves you.
Frank: Baby wants to ****. Get ready to ****. You ****er's ****er. You ****er. Don't you ****in' look at me!...Baby wants blue velvet...Don't ****in' look at me. Don't ****in' look at me. Don't you look at me. Daddy's coming. Daddy's coming home. Don't you ****in' look at me. Daddy's coming home...Don't you ****in' look at me. [blows out the candle] Now it's dark. Stay alive baby. Do it for Van Gogh.

Dorothy: ...What do you want?
Jeffrey: Nothing. Are you all right?
Dorothy: Yeah. I'm all right...
Jeffrey: I'll go then.
Dorothy: Don? Oh Don.
Jeffrey: No.
Dorothy: Oh Don. Hold me. Hold me. I'm scared. I'm scared. I'm scared. [she hugs him tightly]
Jeffrey: It's OK. It's OK.
Dorothy: Do you like me? Do you like me?
Jeffrey: Yes.
Dorothy: Do you like the way I feel?
Jeffrey: Yes.
Dorothy: See my breast? You can feel it. My nipple. Still hard. You can touch it. You can feel it. Do you like the way I feel?
Jeffrey: Yes.
Dorothy: Feel me. Hit me.
Jeffrey: No. Dorothy no. Stop it.
Dorothy: Hit me! Hit me! Hit me!

Sandy: Well, aren't you going to tell me about it?
Jeffrey: OK. It's a strange world Sandy. Dorothy Vallens is married to a man named Don. They have a son. I think the son and the husband have been kidnapped by a man named Frank. Frank has done this to force Dorothy to do things for him. I think she wants to die. I think Frank cut the ear I found off her husband as a warning for him to stay alive. Frank, is, uh, a very dangerous man.
Sandy: My god. Shouldn't you tell my father?
Jeffrey: No. I can't do that. I can't prove any of this. I found out my information illegally. You could get into a lot of trouble.
Sandy: You saw a lot in one night. It's a strange world.
Jeffrey: Why are there people like Frank? Why is there so much trouble in this world?
Sandy: I don't know. I had a dream. In fact, it was the night I met you. In the dream, there was our world and the world was dark because there weren't any robins, and the robins represented love. And for the longest time, there was just this darkness. And all of a sudden, thousands of robins were set free, and they flew down and brought this Blinding Light of Love. And it seemed like that love would be the only thing that would make any difference. And it did. So I guess it means there is trouble 'til the robins come.
Jeffrey: You're a neat girl.
Sandy: So are you. [laughs] I mean, you're a neat guy.

Dorothy: Why are you here? What do you want?
Jeffrey: I, uh...
Dorothy: I looked for you in my closet tonight. It's crazy. I don't know where you come from, but I like you.
Jeffrey: It's not crazy. I like you too.
Dorothy: I liked being with you last night.
Jeffrey: Same here. [they kiss]
Dorothy: Please be with me. Be with me please.

Jeffrey: See that clock on the wall...Five minutes from now, you're not going to believe what I've told you. Number One. Today, I staked out Frank's place with a camera. Now, there's another man involved in all this. I call him the 'Yellow Man'. You saw his back the other day at Dorothy's apartment. Today, I saw the Yellow Man go into Frank's building, laughing with Frank. Now, the only trouble is, what does that prove?
Sandy: Nothing really, but it's interesting.
Jeffrey: Number Two. I saw the Yellow Man come out and meet up with a well-dressed man carrying an alligator briefcase. They went to this factory building downtown, stood on a staircase and looked off into the distance. Now get this. In the distance, there was a murder - this drug dealer was shot to death and a woman had her legs broken.
Sandy: Jeffrey!
Jeffrey: And these two guys told me that the police would find a huge amount of drugs in the dead dealer's place.
Sandy: I can't believe what you're finding out. Are you gonna continue with this?
Jeffrey: Yeah.
Sandy: Until when? I mean, what are you going to do with this stuff?
Jeffrey: Well, I don't know.
Sandy: You're not going back to her apartment. [Jeffrey nods] Jeffrey why?
Jeffrey: I'm seeing something that was always hidden. I'm involved in a mystery. I'm in the middle of a mystery and it's all secret.
Sandy: You like mysteries that much?
Jeffrey: Yeah. You're a mystery. I like you, very much.
Sandy: Oh yeah?
[He kisses her]
Sandy: Jeffrey. Don't. Please.
Jeffrey: You worry about me really?
Sandy: Yeah. Is that so surprising? Yeah, I worry. A lot. I got you into this.

Dorothy: What do you want to do?
Jeffrey: I'll do anything.
Dorothy: Are you a bad boy?
Jeffrey: What do you mean?
Dorothy: Do you want to do bad things? Anything? Anything?
Jeffrey: What do you want?
Dorothy: I want you to hurt me.
Jeffrey: No, I don't want to hurt you. I told you I want to help you. Dorothy, I know some of what's happening. Frank has your husband and son doesn't he? You've got to do something. Go to the police.
Dorothy: No police!! No police!! Go on, hit me. Hit me!
Jeffrey: No, no.
Dorothy: Get away! Get away from my bedroom!

Jeffrey: I'm sorry, Dorothy. I should go.
Dorothy: Yes. You think I'm crazy don't you? I want you to stay. Don't hate me.
Jeffrey: I don't hate you.
Dorothy: I'm not crazy. I know the difference between right and wrong.
Jeffrey: That's good.
Dorothy: You're my special friend. I still have you inside of me. It helps me. I need you.
Jeffrey: I'll call you.
Dorothy: OK. Soon?
Jeffrey: Um, mm.
Dorothy: Would you lie to me? Are you sure?

Dorothy: [to Frank] Hello baby.
Frank: Who is this ****?
Dorothy: A friend, he's from the neighborhood. We were just talking.
Frank: Oh, you're 'from the neighborhood.'
Jeffrey: Yeah.
Frank: You're a neighbor. Well what's your name neighbor?
Jeffrey: Jeffrey.
Dorothy: He's a good kid, Frank.
Frank: Shut the **** up! [to Jeffrey] Hey, you wanta go for a ride?
Jeffrey: No thanks.
Frank: No thanks. What does that mean?
Jeffrey: I don't want to go.
Frank: Go where?
Jeffrey: On a ride.
Frank: A ride? Hell, that's a good idea. Okay, let's go. Hey, let's go.

Paul: You ever been to pussy heaven?
Jeffrey: Uh, no
Frank: What did he say?
Paul: He says, "Uh, no"

Raymond: He's a pussy, Frank!
Frank: Yeah, but he's our pussy. [Looks at Dorothy] Ain't that right, tits?

Frank: What kinda beer do you like?
Jeffrey: Heineken
Frank: Heineken? **** that shit! **** that Heineken shit! Pabst Blue Ribbon!

Ben: Darling? Darling, could you bring some glasses and we'll have a beer with Frank. Thank you. Please sit down.
Frank: Shit man. How the shit are ya?
Ben: Fine, Frank, fine. How are you?
Frank: ****in' good. I'm real ****in' good.

Frank: Where's the glasses? That beer's gonna get warm. One thing I can't ****in' stand is warm beer. It makes me ****in' puke!
Ben: Darling? Where's the glasses? Here, Frank. Here are the glasses. Here are the glasses.
Frank: Raymond, where's the ****in' beer man?
Raymond: It's right here Frank. You want me to pour it?
Frank: No, I want you to **** it. Shit yes. Pour the ****in' beer.

Ben: To your health.
Frank: Ah, shit, let's drink to something else. Let's drink to ****ing. Yeah, say, "Here's to your ****, Frank."
Ben: If you like, Frank. Here's to your ****.
Frank: Suave, man. You're so ****in' suave. [punches Jeffrey oin the face, forcing him to toast Ben]
Jeffrey: Here's to Ben.
Frank: Be polite!
Jeffrey: Here's to Ben.[more enthusiastically]
Ben: Thank you for the toast. That was a very nice neighbor. Did he hurt your little face? [punches Jeffrey in the stomach] That feel better?

Dorothy: Where are we going Frank?
Frank: I'm takin' your neighbor out to **** the country. ****. What are you looking at?
Jeffrey: Nothing.
Frank: Don't you look at me, ****! [whispering] I shoot when I see the whites of your eyes.

Frank: Nobody ****s with me!
Jeffrey: Well, maybe if you find the right girl.

[Jeffrey comes to the breakfast table with a badly bruised face]
Jeffrey: I don't want to talk about it.
Mrs. Beaumont: But...
Jeffrey: Everything is okay, I just don't want to talk about it.
Aunt Barbara: But sometimes it's good to talk things over Jeffrey. For instance, they say that many marriages are saved by people...
Jeffrey: Now Barbara, I love you but you're gonna get it.

Dorothy: Oh God, they hurt him. Jeffrey, Jeffrey, Jeffrey. Hold me. Hold me. Hold me. Oh God. My secret love.
Mrs. Williams: I called for an ambulance and the police are on their way.
Dorothy: Don't get the police. STOP IT. I LOVE YOU. LOVE ME. He put his disease in me. Tell me it's all right. I opened myself to you. Tell me it's all right, all right.
Jeffrey: Sandy...please. Sandy.
Mrs. Williams: I'll get a coat to put on her.
Sandy: Jeffrey, what's going on here?
Jeffrey: I'll tell you.
Dorothy: They have hurt his head.
Jeffrey: Who, Dorothy?
Dorothy: Don. Help him. Help him. Promise me you'll HELP HIM. He put his disease in me.
Jeffrey: I should go.
Sandy: Go.
Jeffrey: ...Sandy? [She slaps him in the face]

Sandy: [on the phone] You lied to me.
Jeffrey: Sandy please. Forgive me. I love you.
Sandy: I forgive you Jeffrey. I loved you. I love you. And I, I couldn't watch that. Is she OK?
Jeffrey: Yeah, she's OK. Listen, get ahold of your father. Tell him to send the police over to Dorothy's apartment right away. Tell him to hurry. I'm leaving right now.
Sandy: Jeffrey don't.
Jeffrey: I have to. I love you.
Sandy: Oh god. Be careful.
Jeffrey: I will, believe me.
Sandy: [after hanging up] It hurts my dream.

Jeffrey: [into the radio] Williams! Detective Williams.
Detective Williams: Detective Williams here. Is that you Jeffrey?
Jeffrey: Yeah it's me. Listen, I'm hiding in Dorothy Vallens' apartment. Frank is on his way up here in a 'well-dressed man' disguise. I've got no way out of here. [realizes that Frank has a radio] He's gonna be here. [into the radio] Detective Williams. I'm hiding in the back bedroom. Please hurry.

Sandy: Look. [She points to a robin on the kitchen's window ledge]
Jeffrey: Yeah, I saw him outside. Maybe the robins are here.
Aunt Barbara: I don't see how they could do that. I could never eat a bug.
Sandy: [smiling] It's a strange world, isn't it? [Jeffrey nods in agreement]

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