Multiple Characters quotes

Scott Donlan: She looks like a ****tail waitress on an oil rig.

Scott Donlan: [upon seeing Christy & Sherri Ann passionately reveal their love for each other on live television] Rhapsody has two mommies.

Gerry Fleck: Don't water the plants, they're plastic!

Sherri Ann Cabot: Leslie and I have an amazing relationship and it's very physical, he still pushes all my buttons. People say 'oh but he's so much older than you' and you know what, I'm the one having to push him away. We have so much in common, we both love soup and snow peas, we love the outdoors, and talking and not talking. We could not talk or talk forever and still find things to not talk about.

Dr. Theodore W. Millbank III: And really, I think what we're talking about is standards, basically; very, very specific, rigid, you could say, but in this world where would we be without them, I think. And notice where we are.

Hamilton Swan: [when Beatrice goes to lick his face] Don't!... not the lips...

Hamilton Swan: Don't look at the fat ass losers or freaks, look at me!

Harlan Pepper: I used to be able to name every nut that there was. And it used to drive my mother crazy, because she used to say, "Harlan Pepper, if you don't stop naming nuts," and the joke was that we lived in Pine Nut, and I think that's what put it in my mind at that point. So she would hear me in the other room, and she'd just start yelling. I'd say, "Peanut. Hazelnut. Cashew nut. Macadamia nut." That was the one that would send her into going crazy. She'd say, "Would you stop naming nuts!" And Hubert used to be able to make the sound, he couldn't talk, but he'd go "rrrawr rrawr" and that sounded like Macadamia nut. Pine nut, which is a nut, but it's also the name of a town. Pistachio nut. Red pistachio nut. Natural, all natural white pistachio nut.

Christy Cummings: It worked for my family... you know, until my mom committed suicide in '81.

Christy Cummings: We started this magazine, 'American Bitch'. It's a focus on the issues of the lesbian pure bred dog owner.

Fay Berman: [yelling at her husband who is trying to coax their son down from the roof] Don't look him in the eye! It challenges him! He doesn't like that!

Hamilton Swan: Honey, I'm thinking of switching to the mock turtleneck?
Meg Swan: Is that not breathing?
Hamilton Swan: Well, it's breathing now, but it'll be hot down there. I could go with the lambswool, but then again, you'll see a lot of khaki down there and this merlot looks good with the gray.

Buck Laughlin: Tell me, do you know the difference between a rectal thermometer and a tongue depressor?
Nurse: Uh, no.
Buck Laughlin: Remind me never to come to you for a physical!

Hotel Manager: We have you down for a queen.
Scott Donlan: What are you suggesting... my dear man?

Stefan Vanderhoof: [at the butcher] Now, Tyrone would like some of those beef kidneys so we'll have a half pound of those.
Scott Donlan: No, not the kidneys, it's the membranes, I don't wanna have to pull those things off.
Stefan Vanderhoof: [rolls eyes] I'll take care of the membranes.
Scott Donlan: [to the butcher] I mean, Randy, you could pull the membrane off.
Stefan Vanderhoof: Will you stop it? So, we'll have a half pound of the kidneys, a half pound of the salmon.
Scott Donlan: And do me a favor, will you? Just get out of those meat sticks; I just wanna hold it.

Gerry Fleck: [after Scott introduces himself as Mary and shows them the pants he hand-stitched] Well you must be very "proud Mary".
Scott Donlan: Oh my goodness. Who are you all of a sudden?
Stefan Vanderhoof: Good baby boomer gag.
Cookie Fleck: Who's that in the burgundy jacket? Mr Hip.

Gerry Fleck: [On why he can't dance] I can't dance, I can't dance, I've got two left feet!
Cookie Fleck: I thought he was kidding.
Gerry Fleck: But I wasn't. I was born with two left feet.

Gerry Fleck: She had dozens of boyfriends.
Cookie Fleck': Hundreds.
Gerry Fleck: Hundreds?
Cookie Fleck: Yeah, hundreds.
Gerry Fleck: Well, I did not know that.

Buck Laughlin: Am I nuts? Something's wrong with his feet.
Trevor Beckwith: I never thought I'd find myself saying this, but you're right.
Buck Laughlin: He's got two left feet.

Gerry Fleck: [talking about Scott's leather trousers] Do you appreciate the amount of work that went into this?
Scott Donlan: I ought to, I did it myself. I did it, I did it myself. I bored him to death, talked about it non-stop.
Stefan Vanderhoof: Well that is six months, six months working with leather and red thread. How much fun was he to be with?

Stefan Vanderhoof: [talking about the first time he saw Scott showing a dog] They had the same prance, the same rhythm, it was like they were two members of the same body.
Scott Donlan: I knew a guy who had two members on the same body, dated him for about a half hour, got so exhausted. I'm sorry, go on, you were telling a story?

  »   More Quotes from
  »   Back to the