All the President's Men quotes

View Quote Hi, I'm Bob Woodward of the Washington Post--and--what's that?--you've never heard of me?--I can't help that--you don't believe I'm with the Post?--what do you want me to do, Madam, shout "extra--extra"?

View Quote Segretti: I'm a lawyer, and I'll probably go to jail, and be disbarred, and what did I do that was so awful? None of it was my idea, Carl--I didn't go looking for the job.
Bernstein: Chapin did contact you then?
Segretti: Sure--off the record.
Bernstein: On the orders of Haldeman?
Segretti: I don't know anything about Haldeman, except, Dwight's frightened of him--everybody's frightened of him--Christ, I wish I'd never gotten messed around with this--all I wanna do is sit in the sun; sit, swim, see some girls.
Bernstein: It gets interesting if it was Haldeman, because our word is that when Chapin says something, he's gotten the OK from Haldeman, and when Haldeman says something, he's gotten the OK from the President.
Segretti: Can't help you.
Benrstein: At USC, you had a word for this--screwing up the opposition you all did it at college and called it rat****ing. [Segretti smiles and nods] Ever wonder if Nixon might turn out to be the biggest rat****er of them all?

View Quote The head of security for the reelection of a Republican President got caught bugging the national offices of the Democrats? What the hell does that mean?

View Quote Woodward: This should take only a minute, Mr. Dahlberg, but we're doing a follow-up on the break-in...and I was kind of curious about your check.
Dahlberg: Check?
Woodward: The twenty-five thousand dollar one....The one with your name on it...In Bernard Barker's Florida account...Bernard Barker, the Watergate burglar.
Dahlberg: You're definitely doing a story?
Woodward: Yes, sir.
Dahlberg: I'm a proper citizen, I'm a decent man, I don't do anything that isn't decent or proper. [pause] I know I shouldn't tell you this...That twenty-five thousand dollars is money I collected for Nixon in this year's campaign.
Woodward: I see. And how do you think it reached Miami?
dahlberg: I don't know; I really don't. The last time I saw it was when I was in Washington. I gave it to the Finance department of the Committee to Re-Elect the President. How it got to that burglar, your guess is as good as mine.

View Quote National editor: Let me tell what happened when I was having lunch today at the Sans Souci.
Rosenfeld: Correction--when you were drinking your lunch at the bar of the Sans Souci.
National editor: This White House guy, a good one, a pro, came up and asked what is this Watergate compulsion with you guys and I said, well, we think it's important and he said, if it's so goddamn important, who the hell are Woodward and Bernstein?
Rosenfeld: Ask him what he's really saying--he means take the story away from Woodstein and give it to his people at the National Desk.
National editor: Well, I've got some pretty experienced fellas sitting around, wouldn't you say so?
Rosenfeld: Absolutely--and that's all they do, sit sit sit--every once in a while, they call up a Senator, some reporting.
National editor: Well, what if your boys get it wrong?
Bradlee: Then it's our asses, isn't it?
Simons: And we'll all have to go to work for a living.

View Quote [about Martha Mitchell] I just don't get it; a CREEP secretary being scared, that's one thing. But what does the wife of one of the most powerful men in America have to be afraid of?

View Quote Sloan: Try and understand this. I'm a decent Republican. I believe in Richard Nixon. I worked in the White House four years--so did my wife. What happened on June 17 I don't think the President knew anything about. Some of his men I'm not so sure of.
Bernstein: Do you think the truth will come out at the trial?
Sloan: That's another of the things I'm not so sure of.
Bernstein: Because people at the Committee were told to lie to the prosecutors?
Sloan: We were never told flat out "Don't talk." But the message was clear.
Bernstein: To cover up?
Sloan: Well, they sure didn't ask us to come forward and tell the truth.
Woodward: Does "they" mean the White House?
Sloan: As opposed to the Committee? The Committee's not an independent operation. Everything is cleared with the White House. I don't think that the FBI or the prosecutors understand that.

View Quote [to Ben Bradlee] Benjy, we got a present for you. Above the fold on page one for sure. It may not change our lives one way or the other. Just a good, solid piece of American Journalism that The New York Times doesn't have.

View Quote It's like they taught us at Harvard: few things are as gratifying to the soul as having another man's nuts in a vise.

View Quote CREEP financed the Watergate break-in, Jesus Christ.

View Quote As a rough rule of thumb, as far as I can throw Bronco Nagurski, that's how much I trust John Mitchell...

View Quote Simons: Anything?
Rosenfeld: Woodward's onto a new wrinkle with the break-in thing--absolute page one stuff--
Simons: In other words, you got nothing, you're thumbsucking.
Rosenfeld: [shrugs] Could develop.

View Quote Librarian: Library.
Bernstein: Hi. Carl Bernstein of the Washington Post. I was just wondering if you remember the names of any of the books that Howard Hunt checked out on Senator Kennedy.
Librarian: I think I do remember, he took out a whole bunch of material. Let me just go see.
Bernstein: What do you think?
Woodward: Hunt doesn't seem like your ordinary consultant.
Bernstein: Maybe a political operative of some sort.
Woodward: A spy, you mean?
Bernstein: It makes sense; Hunt worked for the C.I.A. and the White House was paranoid about Teddy Kennedy.
Librarian: Mr. Bernstein?
Bernstein: Yes, ma'am.
Librarian: What I said before? I was wrong. The truth is, I don't have a card that Mr. Hunt took out any Kennedy material. I remember getting that material out for somebody, but it wasn't Mr. Hunt. The truth is, I've never had any requests at all from Mr. Hunt. [pause] The truth is, I don't know Mr. Hunt.

View Quote [to Wodward] I can't sell hints to Simons-- you called everyone you know? Call someone you don't know.

View Quote Rosenfeld: Where's that cheery face we've come to know and love?
Woodward: You call me in on my day off because some idiots have broken into local Democratic Headquarters--tell me, Harry, why should I be smiling?
Rosenfeld: As usual, that keen mind of yours has pegged the situation perfectly. Except (a) it wasn't local Democratic Headquarters, it was National Democratic Headquarters--and (b) these weren't just any idiots, these were special idiots, seeing as when they were arrested at 2:30 this morning, they were all wearing business suits and Playtex gloves and were carrying--a walkie-talkie, forty rolls of film, cameras, lock picks, pen-sized tear gas guns, plus various bugging devices. Not to mention over two thousand dollars, mostly in sequenced hundred dollar bills.