Multiple Characters quotes

Mr. Morgan: [after reading a Shakespearean sonnet] Now. I know Shakespeare's a dead white guy, but he knows his shit, so we can overlook that. I want you all to write your own version of this sonnet. [Kat raises her hand in the background] Yes, Ms. "I Have An Opinion About Everything?"

Geek: [When asked if he would go out on a date with Kat] Maybe. If we were the last two human beings alive. And there were no sheep. [smiles creepily] Are there sheep?

Bogie Lowenstien: That must be Nigel with the brie.

Joey Donner: [after she punches him in the face] Shit Bianca! I'm shooting a nose-spray ad tomorrow!

Bianca: Yup, see, there's a difference between "like" and "love." Because I like my Skechers, but I love my Prada backpack.
Chastity: But...I love my Skechers.
Bianca: That's because you don't have a Prada backpack!
Chastity: Ohhh...

Chastity: I know you can be overwhelmed and you can be underwhelmed. But can you ever just be whelmed?
Bianca: I think you can in Europe.

Dr. Stratford: Hello, Katarina. Make anyone cry today?
Kat: Sadly, no... but it's only 4:30.

Kat: You're so patronising.
Patrick: Leave it to you to use big words when you're smashed.
Kat: I don't think so.
Patrick: Okay...
Kat: Why are you doing this?
Patrick: I told you. You may have a concussion.
Kat: You don't care if I never wake up.
Patrick: Sure I do.
Kat: Why?
Patrick: Because, well then, I'd have to start taking out girls who actually like me.
Kat: Like you could find one.
Patrick: Ooh, see that, there? Who needs affection when I have blind hatred?

Patrick: So what's your excuse?
Kat: For?
Patrick: Acting the way we do.
Kat: I don't like to do what people expect. Why should I live up to other people's expectations instead of my own?
Patrick: So you disappoint them from the start and then you're covered, right?
Kat: Something like that...
Patrick: Then you screwed up.
Kat: How?
Patrick: You never disappointed me.

Cameron: So far she's not going for my guy. She's not a -
Bianca: K.D. Lang fan? No. I found a picture of Jared Leto in her drawer once, so I'm pretty sure she's not harboring same sex tendencies.

Bianca Stratford: What planet did you come from? Planet Loser?
Kat Stratford: As opposed to Planet Look-at-Me, Look-at-Me?
Walter Stratford: (claps) Ok, here's how we solve this one: Old rule out, new rule: Bianca can date...when she does (points at Kat)
Bianca Stratford: But she´s a mutant! What if she never dates?!
Walter Stratford: Then you'll never date...Oh I like that! And I'll get to sleep at night, the deep slumber of a father whose daughters aren't out being impregnated
Walter Stratford: (his beeper sounds) We'll continue this conversation later

Walter Stratford: Shoulda used the window.
Bianca: Hi Daddy!
Walter Stratford: Hi... where're we going?
Bianca: Well, if you must know... a small study group of friends.
Walter Stratford: Otherwise known as an orgy?!?!
Chastity: Mr. Stratford, it's just a party.
Walter Stratford: And hell is just a sauna.

Walter Stratford: This morning I delivered a set of twins to a fifteen-year-old girl, and you know what she said to me?
Bianca: "I'm a crack-whore who should have made my sleazy boyfriend wear a condom"?
Walter Stratford: Close.. but no. she said, "I should have listened to my father."
Bianca: She did not!
Walter Stratford: Well, that's what she would have said if she wasn't so doped up.

Bianca: Can we for two seconds forget the fact that you are severely unhinged and discuss my need for a night of teenage normalcy?
Walter Stratford: What's normal? Those damn Dawson's River kids, sleeping in each other's beds and whatnot?

Patrick: Someone still has her panties in a twist.
Kat: Don't think for one minute that you had any effect whatsoever on my panties.
Patrick: Well then, what did I have an effect on?
Kat: Other than my upchuck reflex, nothing.

Ms. Perky: People perceive you as somewhat...
Kat: Tempestuous?
Ms. Perky: "Heinous bitch" is the term used most often.

Patrick: Not a big talker, are you?
Kat: Depends on the subject. My fenders don't exactly whip me into a verbal frenzy.

Cameron: She never wanted me. She wanted Joey the whole time.
Patrick: Cameron, do you like the girl?
Cameron: Yeah...
Patrick: Yeah, and is she worth all this trouble?
Cameron: Well, I thought she was, but you know...
Patrick: Well, she is or she isn't. See, first of all, Joey is not half the man you are. Secondly, don't let anyone, ever, make you feel like you don't deserve what you want. Go for it.

Ms. Perky: So, I hear you've been terrorizing Mr. Morgan's class... again.
Kat: Expressing my opinion is not a terrorist action.
Ms. Perky: The way you expressed your opinion to Bobby Ridgeway? By the way, his testicle retrieval operation went quite well, in case you're interested.
Kat: I still maintain that he kicked himself in the balls.

Joey: Mr. Morgan, do you think you could get Kat to take her Midol before she comes to class?
Mr. Morgan: Someday, you gonna get bitch-slapped, and I'm not gonna do a thing to stop it.

Cameron: Wow, is this what a bar looks like?
Michael: [Cameron reaches into a jar on the bar] Don't touch anything! You may get hepatitis.
Patrick: So, what have ya got for me?
Michael: A little insight into a very complicated girl....Uhh, excuse me, just one question before we start. Should you be drinking alcohol when you don't have a liver?
Michael: [Cameron and Patrick look confused] Nevermind.
Cameron: All right, first thing, Kat hates smokers.
Patrick: So you're telling me I'm a... non-smoker.
Michael: Yes... well, just for now.
Cameron: And, umm, here's another problem. Bianca said that Kat likes... pretty guys.
Patrick: Are you telling me I'm not a pretty guy?
Michael: H--... he's very pretty. He's a gorgeous guy.
Cameron: Yeah... I... I... just wasn't sure.
Cameron: All right, here's this... Likes Thai food, feminist prose and angry girl music of the indie rock persuasion. Here's a list of CDs she has in her room...
Patrick: So, I'm supposed to buy her some noodles and a book and sit around listening to chicks who can't play their instruments, right?
Michael: Have you ever been to Club Skunk?
Cameron: Her favorite band's playing there tomorrow night.
Patrick: I can't be seen at Club Skunk. All right?
Cameron: But she'll be there, she's got tickets.
Michael: Just assail your ears for one night.
Cameron: She has a pair of black underwear... If that helps.
Michael: [laughing cooly] Couldn't hurt, right?

Kat: You're not surrounded by your usual cloud of smoke.
Patrick: I know, I quit. Apparently they're bad for you.
Kat: You think?!

Ms. Perky: Patrick Verona. I see we're making our visits a weekly ritual.
Patrick: Only so we can have these moments together. Should I, uh, hit the lights?
Ms. Perky: Oh, very clever, kangaroo boy. Says here you exposed yourself in the cafeteria?
Patrick: I was joking with the lunch lady. It was a bratwurst.
Ms. Perky: Bratwurst? Aren't we the optimist? Next time, keep it in your pouch, okay? Now scoot!

Michael: Sweet love, renew thy force.
Patrick: Don't say shit like that to me. People can hear you.

Walter Stratford: Where is your sister going?
Kat Stratford: She's meeting some bikers. Big ones. Full of sperm.
Walter Stratford: Funny.

Mr. Morgan: I know how difficult it must be to overcome all those years of upper middle-class suburban oppression. Must be tough. But the next time you storm the PTA crusading for better... lunch meat, or whatever you white girls complain about, ask them WHY they can't buy a book written by a black man!
White Rastas: That's right mon!
Mr. Morgan: Don't even get me started on you two!
White Rastas: No problem mon!

Joey: [holding up headshots] Which one do you like better?
Bianca: Hmm, I think I like the white shirt better.
Joey: Yeah, it's more...
Bianca: Pensive?
Joey: Damn, I was going for thoughtful.

Patrick: Well maybe you're not afraid of me but I'm sure you've thought about me naked.
Kat: [sarcastically] Am I that transparent? I want you, I need' you, oh baby, oh baby.

Michael: Okay I talked to her, I got the scoop.
Cameron: What'd she say?
Michael: "Hates him with the fire of a thousand suns." That's a direct quote.
Patrick: Thanks Michael. That's very comforting of you.

Cameron: We are screwed
Michael: Hey, I don't want to hear that defeatist attitude. I want to hear you upbeat.
Cameron: [Cheerfully] We're screwed!
Michael: There you go

Kat: I just need to lie down somewhere
Patrick: Uh, uh. You lie down and you'll go to sleep
Kat: Sleep is good
Patrick: Yeah. Not if you have a concussion.

[Bianca is about to go to the prom with Cameron]
Walter Stratford: What are you wearing?
Bianca: A prom dress.
Walter Stratford: I seem to be hearing that word a lot lately.
Bianca: Well, bye.
Walter Stratford: Stop. Turn. Explain.
Bianca: Well, you know how you said I could date if Kat dated? Well she found this guy which is kinda perfect for her, which is actually kinda perfect for me because Cameron asked me to go to the prom, and I really really really want to go, and I seem to comply to the rule and it's previous stipulations of course!
Cameron: [about to shake Walter's hand] Nice to meet you
[Bianca grabs Cameron's hand before he can shake it]
Bianca: [laughs] Lets go!
Walter Stratford: I know every cop in town Bucko!

Kat: You can't just buy me a guitar every time you screw up, you know.
Patrick: Yeah I know. But then you know there's always drums, and bass, and maybe even one day a tambourine.

Kat Stratford: (after crashing Joey's car) Whoops!
(Cut to The Stratford's house)
Walter Stratford: Whoops?! My insurance does not cover PMS!
Kat Stratford: Well the tell them I had a siezure

Walter Stratford: Bianca still lets me play a few innings, you had me on the bench for years. And when you go to Sarah Lawrence I won't even be able to watch the game.
Kat: (incredulously) When I go?
Walter Stratford: Oh God, don't tell me you changed your mind...I already sent them a check.
(The hug)

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