"Dirty Steve" Stephens: Did you guys see the size of that chicken?

"Dirty Steve" Stevens: He ain't all there, is he?

Charley Bowdre: Did you know pigs is as smart as dogs? It's true. I knew this guy in El Capitan who taught his pig to bark at strangers.

Charley Bowdre: Hey, you ain't no regulator, boy. You just stay here with the pork. They're smarter than you anyway; you might learn something.

Charley Bowdre: I'm not a pistoleer or a knifesmith like that greaser Chavez Chavez over there. I'm a pugilist.

Charley Bowdre: It ain't easy having pals.

Chavez: Mexican-Indian, you son of a bitch.

Richard Brewer: Papers can't do anything right.

"Dirty Steve" Stephens: Damn good riding with you, Chavez.
Chavez: Many nights, my friend... Many nights I've put a blade to your throat while you were sleeping. Glad I never killed you, Steve. You're all right...

"Dirty Steve" Stephens: There are people who will never secede...
John Tunstall: Succeed.
"Dirty Steve" Stephens: Who will never succeed anywhere.
Richard Brewer: There's a whole roomful right here.

Alex McSween: I'm not leaving my house.
William H. Bonney: Alex, if you stay they're gonna kill you. And then I'm gonna have to to go around and kill all the guys who killed you. That's a lot of killing.

Charley Bowdre: Hey, Chavez, how come they ain't killing us?
"Dirty Steve" Stephens: Because we're in the spirit world, asshole. They can't see us.

John Tunstall: Congratulations, Charles. You and Steven will be doing the dirty crockery alone this evening.
Charley Bowdre: Sorry, John. It just struck me funny.
John Tunstall: And to William, both of you.
Charley Bowdre: Apologies, Billy. We was just hacking on you.
"Dirty Steve" Stephens: Yeah, we was just hacking on you.
Richard Brewer: Rumor has it you killed a man, Billy. You don't seem like the killing sort.
"Dirty Steve" Stephens: Yeah, Billy. What'd you kill him for?
William H. Bonney: He was hacking on me.

Murphy: WELL. The belted earl has spoken. All I see are hired thieves.
John Tunstill: These boys are promising young men acquiring an education.
Murphy: Well, I've had you pegged as the type that likes... educatin' young boys.

Richard Brewer: Lord, forgive us for our wrongdoings, for our misguidance by heathen religions. Thank you for keeping us alive. Lord, be with us in doing the right thing. Our Father, who art in Heaven, hallow be thy name.
William H. Bonney: Please, Dick. It's getting cold. [He and Dick both pull guns on each other] I could've killed you, Dick. I could've killed you, but I don't want to kill you. I want to eat.