Walk this way. [pause] No...this way.

My grandfather used to work for your grandfather. Of course, the rates have gone up.

I heard the strangest music from the upstairs kitchen and I just... followed it down. Call it... a hunch. [makes rimshot noise]

It looks dangerous. You go first!

Frau Blücher: I am Frau Blücher. [horses whinny]

Igor: Dr. Frankenstein...
Dr. Frankenstein: "Fronkensteen."
Igor:You're putting me on.
Dr. Frankenstein: No, it's pronounced "Fronkensteen."
Igor: Do you also say "Froaderick"?
Dr. Frankenstein: No..."Frederick."
Igor: Well, why isn't it "Froaderick Fronkensteen"?
Dr. Frankenstein: It isn't; it's "Frederick Fronkensteen."
Igor: I see.
Dr. Frankenstein: You must be Igor.
Igor: No, it's pronounced "eye-gor."
Dr. Frankenstein: But they told me it was "ee-gor."
Igor: Well, they were wrong then, weren't they?

[Howling in the background]
Inga: Werewolf!
Dr. Frankenstein: Werewolf?
Igor: There.
Dr. Frankenstein: What?
Igor: [pointing] There... wolf. There... castle.
Dr. Frankenstein: Why are you talking that way?
Igor: I thought you wanted to.
Dr. Frankenstein: No, I don't want to.
Igor: Suit yourself. I'm easy.

[Frankenstein, Igor and Inga arrive in front of HUGE castle doors with IMMENSE metal door knockers; Igor bangs the door knockers loudly as Frankenstein helps Inga from the carriage]
Dr. Frankenstein: What knockers!
Inga: [blushing, smiling shyly] Oh! Thank you, doctor!

Dr. Frankenstein: [as they are exhuming a body] What a filthy job.
Igor: Could be worse.
Dr. Frankenstein: How?
Igor: Could be raining. [it starts to pour]

[Frederick is perusing a shelf of brains preserved in formaldehyde when Igor, who is standing behind the case with his chin resting on the shelf, begins to sing Just a Gigolo]
Igor:: [sings] I ain't got no body, and nobody cares for me. Yakka tak ta a yakka tak ta ha!
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: [startled] Igor!
Igor: Froedrick!

Dr. Frankenstein: Igor, would you mind telling me whose brain I did put in?
Igor: And you won't be angry?
Dr. Frankenstein: I will NOT be angry.
Igor: Abby... someone.
Dr. Frankenstein: Abby someone. Abby who?
Igor: Abby... Normal.
Dr. Frankenstein: Abby Normal?
Igor: I'm almost sure that was the name.
Dr. Frankenstein: Are you saying that I put an abnormal brain into a seven and a half foot long, fifty-four inch wide GORILLA?!! IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE TELLING ME!!?!?

Dr. Frankenstein: Love is the only thing that can save this poor creature, and I am going to convince him that he is loved even at the cost of my own life. No matter what you hear in there, no matter how cruelly I beg you, no matter how terribly I may scream, do not open this door or you will undo everything I have worked for. Do you understand? Do not open this door.
Inga: Yes, Doctor.
Igor: Nice working with ya.
[Dr. Frankenstein goes into the room with The Monster. The Monster wakes up]
Dr. Frankenstein: Let me out!! LET ME OUT OF HERE!! GET ME THE HELL OUTA HERE!! What's the MATTER with you people?! I was JOKING! Don't you know a joke when you hear one? HA-HA-HA-HA. Jesus Christ, get me out of here!! OPEN THIS GODDAMN DOOR OR I'LL KICK YOUR ROTTEN HEADS IN!!! MOMMY!!!

Dr. Frankenstein: [to The Monster] Hello handsome. You're a good looking fellow, do you know that? People laugh at you, people hate you, but why do they hate you? Because... they are jealous. Look at that boyish face. Look at that sweet smile. Do you wanna talk about physical strength? Do you want to talk about sheer muscle? Do you want to talk about the Olympian ideal? You are a God. And listen to me, you are not evil. You... are... good.
[the Monster starts to cry, and Dr. Frankenstein hugs him]
Dr. Frankenstein: This is a nice boy. This is a good boy. This is a mother's angel. And I want the world to know once and for all, and without any shame, that we love him. I'm going to teach you. I'm going to show you how to walk, how to speak, how to move, how to think. Together, you and I are going to make the greatest single contribution to science since the creation of fire.
Inga: [from outside] Dr. Fronkensteen! Are you all right!
Dr. Frankenstein: MY NAME IS FRANKENSTEIN!

Dr. Frankenstein: My fellow scienti...
Audience: Ssssssssssssssss!
Dr. Frankenstein: ...tists... and neuro-surgeons, ladies and gentlemen. A few short weeks ago coming from a background, believe me, as conservably and traditionaly grounded in scientific fact as any of you, I began an experiment in... incredulous as it may sound... the reanimation of dead tissue.

My grandfather's work was doo-doo! I am not interested in death! The only thing that concerns me is the preservation of LIFE!!!