You Don't Mess with the Zohan quotes
6 total quotes
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Michael: Whoa, what are you, bionic?
Zohan: No, no, no, I only like the girls. Thanks anyways.
Zohan: No, no, no, I only like the girls. Thanks anyways.
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Palestinian immigrant: People hate us. They think we're terrorists.
Israeli immigrant: People hate us, too. They think we're you.
Israeli immigrant: People hate us, too. They think we're you.
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Zohan: [to executive] You like to insult people? [kick-punches him]
Executive: Was that your feet? [gets kicked again]
Zohan: Yes, it was the feet. The feet uppercut!
Executive: Was that your feet? [gets kicked again]
Zohan: Yes, it was the feet. The feet uppercut!
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The Phantom (commercial): Everybody's running to Phantom's Chewy Muchentuchen! for the food that heroes eat. Kubeh, sambousek, delicious Muchentuchen! You never know who you meet! You are going to get spoiled. ALLAH!!!!!
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[Salim and his pals go to a medical store to get liquid nitroglycerin to kill Zohan.]
Clerk: So, how can I help you gentlemen?
Salim: [takes out paper from pocket and reads] We wants lee-khwa-heed kny-troha-gesawin!
Clerk: I beg your pardon? [Salim repeats the words] Uh, I think I have some over here [places a box of Neosporin in front of them] There you go. This is the large container.
Salim: This work?
Clerk: Yes, it works fine.
Salim You use?
Oli Ballsack.
Clerk: Yes, from time to time. Sure!
Salim: [smiling at his friends and then whispering to the clerk] We take twelve!
Clerk: So, how can I help you gentlemen?
Salim: [takes out paper from pocket and reads] We wants lee-khwa-heed kny-troha-gesawin!
Clerk: I beg your pardon? [Salim repeats the words] Uh, I think I have some over here [places a box of Neosporin in front of them] There you go. This is the large container.
Salim: This work?
Clerk: Yes, it works fine.
Salim You use?
Oli Ballsack.
Clerk: Yes, from time to time. Sure!
Salim: [smiling at his friends and then whispering to the clerk] We take twelve!
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Buisnessman: Listen, I am really late for a hotel opening downtown, the Wallbridge hotel.
Zohan: I understand sir. I know the neighborhood inside and backwards. We will not let them stop us.
Buisnessman: What?
Zohan: (Whilst screeching the limo round a corner on two wheels) You want some coffee back there?
Zohan: I understand sir. I know the neighborhood inside and backwards. We will not let them stop us.
Buisnessman: What?
Zohan: (Whilst screeching the limo round a corner on two wheels) You want some coffee back there?