WarGames

WarGames quotes

35 total quotes (ID: 621)

David Lightman
Dr. Stephen Falken
General Beringer
Multiple Characters


Goddammit, I'd piss on a spark plug if I thought it'd do any good!


Gentlemen, I wouldn't trust this overgrown pile of microchips any further than I can throw it.

Flush the bombers, get the subs in launch mode. We are at DEFCON 1.

Nigan: He does fit the profile perfectly. He's intelligent, but an under-achiever; alienated from his parents; has few friends. Classic case for recruitment by the Soviets.

Jim Sting [to Malvin]: Remember you told me to tell you when you were acting rudely and insensitively? Remember that? You're doing it right now.

McKittrick: Excuse me, sir. We can't send these men back to the President of the United States with a lot of head-shrinker horseshit!

Mr. Liggett: Alright, Lightman. Maybe you can tell us who first suggested the idea of reproduction without sex.
David: Um, your wife?

Malvin: I can't believe it, Jim. That girl's standing over there listening and you're telling him about our back doors?
Jim Sting: [yelling] Mister Potato Head! MISTER POTATO HEAD!! Back doors are not secrets!
Malvin: Yeah, but Jim, you're giving away all our best tricks!
Jim Sting: They're not tricks.

Mr. Lightman: This corn is raw!
Mrs. Lightman: I know, isn't it wonderful? It's so crisp!
Mr. Lightman: Of course it's crisp! It's raw!
Mrs. Lightman: No, it's terrific! You can just taste the Vitamin A and D in here. It's great!
Mr. Lightman: Could we have pills and cook the corn?

Jennifer: He wasn't very old, was he?
David: Oh, he was pretty old, he was 41.
Jennifer: Wow, that is old.

Joshua: Shall we play a game?
David: Oh!
Jennifer: I think it missed him.
David: Yeah. Weird isn't it? Love to. How about Global Thermonuclear War.
Joshua: Wouldn't you prefer a nice game of chess?
David: Later. Right now lets play Global Thermonuclear War.
Joshua: Fine.

David: What is the primary goal?
Joshua: You should know, Professor. You programmed me.
David: Oh, c'mon. What is the primary goal?
Joshua: To win the game.

David Lightman: Is it a game... or is it real?
Joshua: What's the difference?
David: Oh wow.
Joshua: You are a hard man to reach.

Stephen Falken: Are either of you paleontologists? I'm in desperate need of a paleontologist.
Jennifer: No, we're high school students.
Stephen Falken: Pity.

Stephen Falken: Except, that I never could get Joshua to learn the most important lesson.
David: What's that?
Stephen Falken: Futility. That there's a time when you should just give up.
Jennifer: What kind of a lesson is that?
Stephen Falken: Did you ever play tic-tac-toe?
Jennifer: Yeah, of course.
Stephen Falken: But you don't anymore.
Jennifer: No.
Stephen Falken: Why?
Jennifer: Because it's a boring game. It's always a tie.
Stephen Falken: Exactly. There's no way to win. The game itself is pointless! But back in the war room, they believe you can win a nuclear war.