True Lies

True Lies quotes

66 total quotes (ID: 715)

Albert Gibson
Faisil
Harry Tasker
Helen Tasker
Juno Skinner
Simon
Spencer Trilby


Albert Gibson: Care to tango?
Faisil: Yes, I would.
Harry Tasker: Assholes.


Harry Tasker: Helen is having an affair.
Albert Gibson: Welcome to the club!

Men want this for only one thing, pussy right.

[Simon is attempting to have sex with Helen.]
Helen Tasker: No, I can't. I can't!
[Simon is still persuing.]
Simon: If not for me, Helen, do it for your country!

Hey because it's you

I have to lie to women to get laid. And I don't score much. I got a really small dick, it's pathetic.

Helen Tasker: Have you ever killed anyone?
Harry Tasker: Yeah, but they were all bad.

Party Guard: Can I see your invitation?
Harry Tasker: Sure, here's my invitation. [blows shed sky-high]

[about Harry's daughter]
Albert Gibson: Do you think she's still a virgin.
Harry Tasker: Don't be ridiculous, she's only - what is she now?
Albert Gibson: She's fourteen!
Harry Tasker: She's fourteen years old!
Albert Gibson: Yeah, and her little hormones are going off like a car alarm.

So far, this is not blowing my skirt up, gentlemen.

Kids - 10 seconds of joy, 30 years of misery.

Sweet Jesus, Harry, you surely screwed the pooch last night, didn't you?

So your life's in the crapper. So your wife is banging a used car salesman - it's humiliating, I know. But goddamnit, Harry, take it like a man!

Samir: Is there anything you'd like to tell me before we start?
Harry Tasker: Yeah: I'm going to kill you pretty soon.

It's a scale really, with a perfect mission at one end and a total pooch screw at the other, and we're right about in the middle.