Trading Places quotes

37 total quotes

Billy Ray Valentine
Louis Winthorp III
Others

View Quote Beeks: Hey. Back off! I'll rip out your eyes and piss on your brain.

View Quote [while acting blind and legless] Hey, baby, what's happening? How are ya doing? Once you have a man with no legs, you never go back, baby. I know what you're thinkin'. You seen "Porgy and Bess"? [the woman begins to walk away] We can make it, baby! Me and you!... You BITCH!

View Quote [after demonstrating some fake karate moves while in jail] That's called the "quart of blood" technique. You do that, a quart of blood will drop out of a man's body.

View Quote [watching cops subduing an unruly suspect] May I suggest using your night stick officer?

View Quote When I was growing up, if we wanted a Jacuzzi, we had to fart in the tub.

View Quote Hey that's the motherf- I mean... that's the gentleman that had me busted.

View Quote [[to Penelope, as he is leaving jail] Those men wanted to have sex with me!

View Quote I had the most absurd nightmare. I was poor and no one liked me. I lost my job, I lost my house, Penelope hated me and it was all because of this terrible, awful Negro.

View Quote He was wearing my Harvard tie. Can you believe it? My Harvard tie. Like oh, sure he went to Harvard.

View Quote Ophelia: [noticing Louis watch her undress] By the way, food and rent aren't the only things around here that cost money. You sleep on the couch.

View Quote Officer Reynolds: [to Louis] Strip, you little shit, before I tear you a new asshole!

View Quote Corrupt Cop: [Takes some PCP out of a baggie and tastes it] That's PCP! Phenycyclidine. Angel dust! You ever seen what this stuff does to kids? You're looking at 5 to 10 mandatory... Louis!

View Quote Bunny: And she stepped on the ball.

View Quote Even Bigger Black Guy: It ain't cool being no jive turkey so close to Thanksgiving.

View Quote Harvey: Monkey? MONKEY! I'm a ****ing gorilla, you clown!