Thank You for Smoking

Thank You for Smoking quotes

28 total quotes (ID: 570)

Multiple Characters
Nick Naylor


You know that guy that can get any girl? I'm him … on crack.


Everyone's got a mortgage to pay. [inner monologue] The Yuppie Nuremberg defense.

BR: We don't sell Tic Tacs, for Christ's sake, we sell cigarettes. And they're cool, available, and addictive. The job is almost done for us.

Heather Holloway: My other interviews have pinned you as a mass murderer, blood sucker, pimp, profiteer and my personal favorite, yuppie Mephistopheles.

Doak "The Captain" Boykin: You're family now. Tobacco takes care of its own.

Joey Naylor: It's like you always said, Dad, "If you want an easy job, go work for the Red Cross."

Nick Naylor: Now, what we need is a smoking role model, a real winner.
Jeff Megall: Indiana Jones meets Jerry Maguire.
Nick Naylor: Right, on two packs a day.

Nick Naylor: Jeff, when do you sleep?
Jeff Megall: Sunday.

[Inside the elevator at Entertainment Global Offices (EGO)]
Jack: Do you hear that?
Nick Naylor (pause): No.
Jack: Exactly!

Joey: You're The Sultan of Spin!
Nick: "The Sultan of Spin"?
Joey: Mom subscribes to Newsweek.

Joey: Why did you tell that reporter all your secrets?
Nick: You're too young to understand.
Joey: Mom says it's because you have dependency issues and it was all just a matter of time before you threw it all away on some tramp.
Nick: Well, that's one theory.

[Nick and Heather are introducing themselves to each other]
Heather Holloway: Heather Holloway.
Nick: Nick Naylor. Big Tobacco.
Heather Holloway (holds up tape recorder): Is this kosher?
Nick: Only if I can call you Heather.
Heather Holloway: By all means. So, Mr. Naylor …
Nick (interrupting): Nick.
Heather Holloway: Nick. Let's start with …
Nick: '82 Margaux.
Heather Holloway: Okay. Is it good?
Nick: "Good"? It'll make you believe in God.

Nick: What?
Bobby: I got a call from the paper.
Nick: Really? What they want?
Bobby: They wanted to correct spelling of my name and job title.
Polly: You didn't tell her about us, did you?
Nick: Who? … Heather? No! … I mean, maybe in passing.
Polly: In passing.
Bobby: Oh God, he ****ed her. I tried to warn you …
Polly: Hey, he didn't **** her. You didn't **** her, did you? … When?
Bobby: In passing.
Nick: Look, she's a really nice girl.
Bobby: Oh God, we're really ****ed.