Stripes quotes

View Quote Psycho: My name's Francis Sawyer... but everyone calls me Psycho. Any of you guys call me Francis... I'll kill ya.
Leon: Ooooooh.
Psycho: You just made the list, buddy. Also, I don't like no one touching my stuff. So just keep your meathooks off. If I catch any of you guys in my stuff... I'll kill ya. And I don't like nobody touching me. Any of you homos touch me... I'll kill ya.
Sergeant Hulka: Lighten up, Francis. We're all in this together. One of these men may save your life one of these days, you understand that?
'Winger: Then again maybe one of us won't.

View Quote Sergeant Hulka: Okay, Mr. Push-ups, let's hear your story.
John Winger: Chicks dig me, because I rarely wear underwear and when I do it's usually something unusual. But now I know why I have always lost women to guys like you. I mean, it's not just the uniform. It's the stories that you tell. So much fun and imagination.
[points to the soldier next to him]
John Winger: Lee Harvey, you are a madman. When you stole that cow, and your friend tried to make it with the cow. I want to party with you, cowboy. But the two of us together? Forget it! I'm gonna go out on a limb here. I'm gonna volunteer my leadership to this platoon. An army without leaders is like a foot without a big toe. And Sergeant Hulka isn't always gonna be here to be that big toe for us. I think that we owe a big round of applause to our newest, bestest buddy, and big toe... Sergeant Hulka.
[the soldiers start clapping]
Sergeant Hulka: Well, okay, hotshot. We're gonna see what kind of soldier you are.

View Quote General Barnicke: Where the hell have you been, soldier?
John Winger: Traaaaaaaining, sir!
Soldiers: Training, sir!
General Barnicke: What kind of training, son?
John Winger: Aaaaaaarmy training, sir!
Soldiers: Army training, sir!
[laughter]
General Barnicke: Where's your drill sergeant, men?
John Winger: Blown up, sir!
Capt. Stillman: Uhh, yes, sir, these are Sgt. Hulka's men. He was injured during basic training.
General Barnicke: I soo. So am I to understand you men completed your training on your own?
John Winger: Tha's the fact, Jack!
Soldiers: That's the fact, Jack!
General Barnicke: Captain, these are exactly the kind of go-getters I want on my EM-50 project.
Capt. Stillman: But, sir . . .
General Barnicke: Don't "But" me, Captain. I want them on the plane. Tonight!
John Winger: Gentlemen, it's party time...battalion style!

View Quote John Winger: C'mon, it's Czechoslovakia. We zip in, we pick 'em up, we zip right out again. We're not going to Moscow. It's Czechoslovakia. It's like we're going into Wisconsin.
Russell Ziskey: Well, I got the shit kicked out of me in Wisconsin once. Forget it.

View Quote Capt. Stillman: It looks like a fine group of men, Sergeant.
Ox: I sure hope this is the mess hall! (to Stillman, observing his Captain insignia): How's it goin', Eisenhower?!
Sgt. Hulka: Yes, sir, a fine group of men.
Russell Ziskey: [teaching an English class to foreigners] Okay, I know you're anxious to jump right in and start speaking English, but there's a couple of things I need to know first, because I've never done this before. So, how many of you would say you speak English fairly well, but with some difficulties?
[pause]
Russell Ziskey: A little English?
[a man raises his hand]
Russell Ziskey: Yes? You speak some English?
Man: Son of bitch. Shit.
Class: [in unison] Son of bitch. Shit.

View Quote Captain Stillman: Well, explain yourselves.
Dewey Oxburger: We were going to the Bingo parlour...at the YMCA. Well, one thing led to another, and the instructions got all fouled up and...
Captain Stillman: Shut up.
Dewey Oxburger: Okay, Sir.
Captain Stillman: You men are a disgrace! Maybe a few days in the stockade will help you change your rotten attitudes.
Cruiser: But um, we're supposed to graduate tomorrow, sir.
Captain Stillman: That's even better. Tomorrow you're going to be on parade in front of General Barnicke. And when he sees what total **** ups you really are, I will personally recommend that the whole platoon will repeat the entire course of basic training.

View Quote Sergeant Hulka: We got a full day ahead of us. We're gonna start out with a five-mile run.
[Soldiers groan]
John Winger: I know that I'm speaking for the entire platoon when I say this run should be postponed until this platoon is better rested.
Sergeant Hulka: Well, I'll tell you what, soldier. Let's make it ten miles.

View Quote Captain Stillman: All right, soldier, let's see how you fire that mortar.
Soldier with Mortar: What coordinates, sir?
Captain Stillman: [annoyed] Coordinates?
Soldier with Mortar: Yes, sir, they determine where the mortar's...
Captain Stillman: Soldier, the army has spent a lot of money teaching you to fire that thing. Now set it and fire it.
Soldier with Mortar: Sir, we don't know where the shell's gonna...
Captain Stillman: Soldier. The only way to learn anything is to do it. Now fire the weapon.

View Quote My doctor says I've been swallowing a lot of aggression, along with a lot of pizzas.

View Quote Y'know, one day, Tito Puente will be dead, and you'll say, "Oh, I've been listening to him for years, and I think he's fabulous."

View Quote Recruiter: Now, are either of you homosexuals?
John Winger: You mean like flaming?
Recruiter: Well, it's a standard question we have to ask.
Russell Ziskey: No, we're not homosexual, but we are willing to learn.
John Winger: Yeah . . . Would they send us someplace special?

View Quote Well, my name's Dewey Oxburger. My friends call me Ox. I dont know if you've noticed, but I got a slight weight problem.

View Quote Cruiser: I joined the army 'cause my father and my brother were in the army. I figured I better join before I got drafted.
Sergeant Hulka: Son, there ain't no draft no more.
Cruiser: There was one?

View Quote I've always been kind of a pacifist. When I was a kid, my father told me, "Never hit anyone in anger, unless you're absolutely sure you can get away with it." I don't know what kind of soldier I'm gonna make, but I want you guys to know that if we ever get into really heavy combat... I'll be right behind you guys. Every step of the way.

View Quote Louise Cooper: It's called 'Force Field' and you try to get as close as you can without touching.
Russell Ziskey: Oh, I think I'm good at this.
Louise Cooper: We'll see.
[Louise lays down, Russell hovers over her, then kisses her.]
Louise Cooper: You broke my force field.
Russell Ziskey: Yeah, you win. [kisses her]