Allen Bauer quotes

She's really hungry. Explaining why his date (a mermaid in human form) was eating an entire lobster - including the shell.

It just so happens I come from a very long line of married people.

I am not a fish! How many times do I have to tell you people that? Now, will just let me outta here? Please? Huh? People? Said while standing naked in a tank with wires trailing from his body.

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