The Simpsons Movie

The Simpsons Movie quotes

86 total quotes (ID: 540)

Bart
Homer
Lisa
Marge
Multiple Characters


Agnes Skinner: [after Bart skateboards past her in the nude] Don't look where I'm pointing!


Chief Wiggum: [After seeing the Simpson family (along with their house) disappear down the sinkhole] Well... they're China's problem now.

Chief Wiggum [chasing the nude Bart] Stop in the name of American squeamishness!

Government Employee: Hey, everybody, I found one! THE GOVERNMENT ACTUALLY FOUND SOMEONE WE'RE LOOKING FOR!!! YEAH, BABY, YEAH!!!

Grampa: [Witnessing his own prophecy coming true] That crazy old man in church was right!

Lou: [To Bart, after he skateboards in the nude] Listen, kid, no one likes wearing clothes in public. But, you know, it's the law!

Moe Szyslak: [After Lisa reveals that she put polluted water from Lake Springfield in everyone's drinking glasses] This is why we should hate kids!

Mr. Burns: So... you want some of my electricity, do you? Well, for once the rich white man is in control! I have two buttons behind this desk: one will supply your town with power, the other releases the hounds. Reach me. Make me your brother.

Nelson Muntz: [as some students from Springfield Elementary prepare to use bows to fire arrows at the Simpsons] I'm using a red arrow, so I know who I kill!

Ralph Wiggum: [after Bart goes past him in the nude on his skateboard] I like men now!

Ticker: Watch Are You Smarter Than a Celebrity? Wednesdays on FOX. That's right, we even advertise shows during movies now.

Tom Hanks: This is Tom Hanks saying if you see me in person, please leave me be.

Chief Wiggum: Come on, Bomb-Disarming Robot, you're our only hope!
Bomb-Disarming Robot: Red wire... blue wire... black is usually the ground... ehh... so much pressure... PRESSURE!!!! [grabs Wiggum's pistol and shoots himself in the head]
Wiggum: He'd been talking about it, but I never took him seriously!

Colin: I'm Colin.
Lisa: I haven't seen you at school.
Colin: Just moved from Ireland. My dad's a musician.
Lisa: Is he--
Colin: He's not Bono.
Lisa: I just thought, because you're Irish and you care about...
Colin: [Sternly] He's not Bono.
Lisa: Do you play?
Colin: Just piano, guitar, trumpet, drums, and bass.
Lisa: [thinking] He's pure gold! For once in your life, be cool!
Colin: So, is your name as pretty as your face?
[Completly embarressed and flattered, Lisa bursts into shrieks of laughter and falls to the ground.]
Colin: You okay there? [Lisa continues heavily and wheezily giggling.]

EPA Soldier: I'm afraid we lost them, sir.
Russ Cargill: Dammit!!!
[Cargill throws his binoculars at the EPA soldier, who cowers in fear. The binoculars bounce back off the dome and hit Cargill in the face.]
Russ Cargill: Well then you find 'em, and you get 'em back in the dome! And to make sure nobody else gets out, I want roving death squads around the perimeter 24-7! I want 10,000 tough guys, and I want 10,000 soft guys to make the tough guys look tougher! And here's how I want them arranged: tough, soft, tough, tough, soft, tough, soft, soft, tough, tough, soft, soft, tough, soft.
[pause]
EPA Soldier: Sir, I'm afraid you've gone mad with power.
Russ Cargill: Of course I have. Have you ever tried going mad without power? It's boring, no one listens to you!