Mr. Pink quotes

I'm very sorry the government taxes their tips, that's ****ed up. That ain't my fault. It would seem to me that waitresses are one of the many groups the government ****s in the ass on a regular basis. Look, if you show me a piece of paper that says the government shouldn't do that, I'll sign it, put it to a vote, I'll vote for it, but what I won't do is play ball. And this non-college bullshit you're givin' me, I got two words for that: learn to ****in' type, 'cause if you're expecting me to help out with the rent you're in for a big ****in' surprise.

[rubs his middle finger and thumb against each other] You know what this is? It's the world's smallest violin, playing just for the waitresses.

Where's the commode in this dungeon? I gotta take a squirt.

Somebody's shoved a red-hot poker up our ass, and I want to know whose name is on the handle!

I don't wanna kill anybody. But if I gotta get out that door, and you're standing in my way, one way or the other, you're gettin' outta my way.

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