Napoleon Dynamite

Napoleon Dynamite quotes

79 total quotes (ID: 411)

Kip
Napoleon Dynamite
Rex
Uncle Rico


Don: Hey, Napoleon. What did you do last summer again?
Napoleon: I told you! I spent it with my uncle in Alaska hunting wolverines!
Don: Did you shoot any?
Napoleon: Yes, like 50 of 'em! They kept trying to attack my cousins, what the heck would you do in a situation like that?
Don: What kind of gun did you use?
Napoleon: A frickin' twelve-gauge, what do you think?


Uncle Rico: So, what do you think?
Kip: It's pretty cool, I guess.
Uncle Rico: Ohhhh, man, I wish I could go back in time. I'd take state.
Napoleon: This is pretty much the worst video ever made.
Kip: Napoleon, like anyone can even know that.
Uncle Rico: You know what, Napoleon? You can leave.
Napoleon: You guys are retarded!

Man I wish I could go back in time... I'd take state.

Kip: So how long are we talking about working?
Uncle Rico: What,are you already losing your steam?
Kip: No, I just... I have a chat room meeting at four. I gotta be back here by then.
Uncle Rico: All right, you just start a little earlier, that's all. Or else work afterwards. How long is the chat room?
Kip: Jeez, sometimes up to 3 or 4 hours maybe... maybe not...
Uncle Rico: You pay the bills for that? Does that cost money every time you're on, like for minutes on the phone?
Kip: Yeah, grandma's still paying per minute. She gets kinda pissed at me sometimes cause I'm on there so long.
Uncle Rico: I bet she does. I'll tell you something, I'd be throwing you out the window.

[Whispering while typing] I love the way your sandy hair floats in the air... To me it's like a lullaby... I'm just flying by...Oh so high... like a kite... tied to a stake.

Deb: And here we have some boondoggle keychains. A must-have for this season's fashion.
Napoleon: I already made, like, infinity of those at scout camp.
Deb: Well, is anyone else here? I'm trying to earn money for college.
Kip: [in the background] Your mom goes to college!
[Deb shoves the case into Napoleon's hands and runs away]

Uncle Rico: What about your girlfriend?
Kip: Well, things are getting pretty serious right now. I mean, we chat online for, like, two hours everyday so I guess you could say things are gettin' pretty serious.

Napoleon: Why do you got your hood on like that?
Pedro: Well, when I came home from school, my head started to get really hot. So I drank some cold water, but it didn't do nothing. So I laid in the bathtub for a while, but then I realized that it was my hair that was making my head so hot. So I went in the kitchen, and I shaved it all off and I don't want no one to see.

Napoleon: Well, what is there to eat?
Grandma: Knock it off, Napoleon! Make yourself a dang quesadilla!
Napoleon: Fine!

At Rex Kwon Do, we use the buddy system. No more flying solo! You need somebody watching your back AT ALL TIMES! Second off, you're gonna learn to discipline your image. You think I got where I am today because I dressed like Peter Pan over here? [gestures toward Napoleon]

Pedro: Do you think people will vote for me?
Napoleon: Heck yes! I'd vote for you.
Pedro: Like what are my skills?
Napoleon: Well, you have a sweet bike, and you're really good at hooking up with chicks. Plus you're,like, the only guy at school who has a mustache.
Pedro: That's true.

Just break the wrist, and then walk away. Break the wrist; walk away.

Lafawnduh is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I'm 100% positive she's my soul mate. Don't worry Napoleon, I'm sure there's a babe out there for you too. Peace out.

Napoleon, you know we can't afford the fun pack! What, do you think money grows on trees in this family? Take it back! And get some Pampers for you and your brother while you're at it.

Grab my arm. The other arm. MY other arm!