Meet the Parents

Meet the Parents quotes

43 total quotes (ID: 779)

Gaylord 'Greg' Focker
Jack Byrnes
Pam Byrnes


Jack: Let me ask you a question, Greg. Let's just say you have kids...and you wanna get out of the house, spend a night on the town. So, you hire a baby-sitter, someone you think you can trust. References, work experience-- it all checks out fine. But then how do you really know for certain...that your loved ones are safe with this stranger? I mean, can you ever really trust another human being, Greg?
Greg: Sure, I think so.
Jack: No, the answer is you cannot.


Pam: You are the most adorable, loving, sweetest man in the whole world, and I love you. And very soon my parents are gonna see that...and grow to love you too, okay?
Greg: Okay. Speaking of growing to love you--
Pam: Honey, it's late. Come on.
Greg: I know it's late. But Mr. Winky is still on Chicago time, and we both know there's only one way to make Mr. Winky go away. [Knocking] And there it is.

[About Mr. Jinx, the cat] You tried to milk him, didn't you you sick son of a bitch?

Pam: Jesus, Dad, you ever think of knocking?
Jack: Not in my own den. What are you two doing in here?
Larry: I'd say rounding second base.

Jesus, Focker. It's just a game.

Trust me, Greg, when you start having little Fockers running around, you'll feel the need for this type of security.

[After Greg claims he milked a cat and could milk anything with nipples] I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me?

I'd better get upstairs...and pay a little visit to the shower fairy.

Sorry, folks. Had to pay a little visit to the urinal fairy.

Pam: I love you Dad, but you could be a real jerk sometimes. [storms out of room]
Jack: [to Dina] So what if he passed some test? He's still not good for Pam!
Dina: Well who is, Jack? No one has ever been good enough for your Pam. You only warmed up to Kevin after she broke up with him.

[Greg's forgotten to change his shoes before meeting Pam] That's okay, honey. You know I can't resist a man in nurse's shoes.

[During the cellar interrogation scene] Have you ever watched...pornographic...videos?

[about the lost Jinx] We're supposed to let him wander the streets without food, water or toilet?