Meet the Parents

Meet the Parents quotes

43 total quotes (ID: 779)

Gaylord 'Greg' Focker
Jack Byrnes
Pam Byrnes


Pam: Greg, sweetie, how you doing?
Greg: Oh, just fine, considering I desecrated your grandma's remains, found out you were engaged and had your father ask me to milk him. At least back then he was still talking to me. I can't believe you didn't tell me you were that close.
Pam: Who, Daddy and me?
Greg: No, Kevin and you.
Pam: Do we have to know everything about each other's pasts? You never told me about your cat-milking days in Motown.
Greg': That was a long time ago, Pam.
Pam: Yeah, okay, well, so was this. Kevin's and my connection was more physical than anything else.
Greg: Physical? Like what? Like you worked out together?
Pam: No, no, it was nothing, nothing. It was a stupid sexual thing.
Greg: Mm-hmm. I'm gonna go throw up now.


[About Mr. Jinx, the cat] You tried to milk him, didn't you you sick son of a bitch?

Pam: You are the most adorable, loving, sweetest man in the whole world, and I love you. And very soon my parents are gonna see that...and grow to love you too, okay?
Greg: Okay. Speaking of growing to love you--
Pam: Honey, it's late. Come on.
Greg: I know it's late. But Mr. Winky is still on Chicago time, and we both know there's only one way to make Mr. Winky go away. [Knocking] And there it is.

Pam: Jesus, Dad, you ever think of knocking?
Jack: Not in my own den. What are you two doing in here?
Larry: I'd say rounding second base.

Jesus, Focker. It's just a game.

Trust me, Greg, when you start having little Fockers running around, you'll feel the need for this type of security.

[After Greg claims he milked a cat and could milk anything with nipples] I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me?

I'd better get upstairs...and pay a little visit to the shower fairy.

Pam: I love you Dad, but you could be a real jerk sometimes. [storms out of room]
Jack: [to Dina] So what if he passed some test? He's still not good for Pam!
Dina: Well who is, Jack? No one has ever been good enough for your Pam. You only warmed up to Kevin after she broke up with him.

Sorry, folks. Had to pay a little visit to the urinal fairy.

[Greg's forgotten to change his shoes before meeting Pam] That's okay, honey. You know I can't resist a man in nurse's shoes.

[During the cellar interrogation scene] Have you ever watched...pornographic...videos?

[about the lost Jinx] We're supposed to let him wander the streets without food, water or toilet?