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Mean Machine

Mean Machine quotes

38 total quotes

Danny Meehan
Doc
Massive
Mr Burton




View Quote It's funny, but when you're in that football world, you just don't realise what it means to people. You only find out how disappointed they are, when you let them down. I was 16 when I signed pro forms. Thought I was the business. Didn't take long for standards to start slipping. Cars, booze, bad tips for slow horses... You think you can handle it, then bang, very soon it's handling you. Before I was picking up trophies, I was 425 grand down to men nasty enough... well, even they would have put the wind up Mr Sykes. But they did give me two choices - a wheelchair for life, or a deliberate penalty against the Germans. It's not as if I've prospered. Look where I've ended up.
View Quote Sykes: What money?
Danny Meehan: You're a betting man. We'll make a deal. Let your lads play. Win or lose, you call the result. Bet accordingly.
Sykes: Back to your fixing the match routine, right? Now listen, it's like this - I'd never take a bet against England, and I wouldn't bet the screws against the cons. Capisce?
Danny Meehan: Then we can play to win. Would you think about it?
Sykes: Yes, I'll think about it. But right now, I'm thinking you're polluting my air. Now go away.
View Quote It's called sunlight, Meehan. Think of it as a privilege which can be withdrawn.
View Quote [When asked to be breathalised by the cops] No need, officer. I'm absolutely drunk.
View Quote [Danny Meehan is about to take a free kick in front of a wall - the ball is kicked straight to Mr Ratchett's private part]
Bob Likely: Ooh! Right in his carrots and onions!
Bob Carter: No nookie for Mr Ratchett.
Bob Likely: No nookie for Mrs Ratchett neither.
View Quote Most of the guys in here have nothing. Never had to start with. But you, you had everything they ever dreamed of. And you threw it all away.
View Quote [After learning Mr Ratchett has been kicked twice in the same area]
Bob Carter: Just goes to show lightning can strike twice.
Bob Likely: Abso-****ing-lutely, Bob.
View Quote [Referring to a clipboard Massive is holding]
Danny Meehan: What's that?
Massive: I'm your manager.
Danny Meehan: Since when?
Trojan: Look, don't bother giving me no orders, yeah?
Massive: Look, stop bitching, bitch.
View Quote I just wanna keep my head down, do my twelve months and I'm going home.
View Quote Only does your nut in if you don't think you should be here. Look at me, sweet old man? A bit bumbly, full of jail-block wisdom, cornerstone of the jail, put in with the foundations, right? Right. I didn't get to be the oldest con for breaking windows. Villains spend their lives shitting themselves that other criminals are going to see to them. So they get their retaliation first as twice as nasty. A bloke was coming after me, so I, um, I went around to his digs and lobbed grenade in the window. Left over after the war, you know, army surplus. I didn't know, but he had his little baby and his little girl in there with him. The house went up like a firecracker. No one came out. He'd barricaded the door with furniture in case I came around. By the time they got in, the screaming stopped. Thirteen months old, learning to walk apparently. Nothing I can do is ever going to make up for that, is it?
View Quote Some of the boys have a crap in the night, wrap it and airmail it out the window.
View Quote [Prison guard to Secretary]:Hayter: I wouldn't get too close, Miss.
[Secretary to Danny]
Tracey: Why? You're not dangerous. Are you, Mr footballer?
[Meehan to Secretary]
Danny Meehan: Only if you've got the ball, Miss.
View Quote I'm in here for drunken assault.
View Quote You're becoming a sentimental old fart.
View Quote It's ironic